I read somewhere once that,
The most upsetting thing is
when you realize that you've spent every single day with someone,
seeing them every moment of the day
before you go to sleep and even when you wake up
just to have all that thrown away over someone who doesn't even matter.
It hurts when you loose someone you care about
but I think
it hurts even more when you loose that person you care about who,
was not only your everything but also your best friend.

I never meant to pierce with your heart with a spear of hurt.
I wanted to pierce your heart with a sword so that I may obtain your trust and love.
I want to spend each moment of the day with you until I fall asleep
And I want to be the one you lay your head next to.

Because when you wake up…
I want to be the first thing you think about.
I want the letters of my name run across your mind.
When you wake up…
I want you to be assured that each day meant something,
That each day and second mattered.
When you wake up…
I want to be right there and see each centimeter of your eye open.
I want to lie next to so close till I can count each specific eye lash upon each one of your eye lids.
When you wake up…
I want to know that I finished first place at the finish line of your dreams.
When you wake up…
I want to be intimate, not physically, but mentally until our lusts become desired love.
I want our mental copulation to be wrapped in undefined love.

When I look into your eyes I want to see that I am embedded in your mind and you in mine.
I want you to fall asleep the night before and know that I’m here to stay
And when you wake up…
You take a breathe open your eyes, and see me laying in your bed.

i wish with all my heart that

you will never know the word
                                                    fat

that you will never know the sting of insecurity like sunburn on your skin
that you will never feel the need to be anymore than you already
are
because you will be as brilliant as all of the constellations spun into one

i
wish with all my heart that
you will never meet the same boys your mother did

that you will never feel the hot-sloshing cocktail of heartbreak, guilt, and *****
in your stomach.
that
you will never know the stain of a broken society
or the fear of a failing planet

that you will never feel the same bitter hate that your mother does
and that instead of fire you will breathe
peace, but your words will scorch those who dare hurt you
because your mother is too full of fire for you to be completely free of it.