Late evenings get me blue.
I swear I'm always thinking about you
and things you said that weren't true.
It was never new
how you'd make me feel so low.
So when you didnt show,
I didn't care anymore. Even though,
I missed you until my heart popped
and my heartbeat had stopped.
Then I woke eventually,
where you spoke nonchalantly.
And sometimes you need my love.
Sometimes you'd rather shove
Me away until I push you away for days,
you get me in a haze,
I love you, I care, don't go
I'm not ready to be on my own

K.K.

Why am I afraid of you?
It's not for me to choose-
you are not someone I want to lose.

K.K.

An athlete who's good on his feet
A teenager who got into bed with her
A son with a father who thought he didn't matter.

I look into his eyes
and see the look I despise.
His face says nothing,
but he's searching for something.

He doesn't know it, but he wants to feel content.

He hasn't spent much time trying to heal the right way.
He's losing himself day by day.

I've tried to open him up, but all I got
was his hand gripped onto mine. I fought
for him to stay. I pleaded.
The only thing he's ever needed
was to accept his father's absence.
He hasn't been the same since.

I hope and I yearn
that one day he'll learn
to open up to love.
When push comes to shove,
even though he hurt me,
he deserves to be loved. For he
never got the chance
for a true romance.

K.K.

I used to not understand why you would put a drug in your body-
but, then I looked at your past.
Your pain, how it burned.
Your mother gone.
Your family... None.
I don't think it is okay,
but I can understand.

Things are better today.
You moved away.
Your sad eyes swallow your smile.
I can only pray that I never see
you depart from me.

K.K.

The clouds wrapped the sky into a gray earth. Pounds of my heartbeats scattered, matching the rhythm of the thunder. "Protective" laced your being. I drowned in what was once a puddle of your affection. As the rolling thunder spoke, your soothing caress spoke louder. I was content. He was special. A man who was masked by masculinity. I saw through his frame. Yet he joked and told tales, he yearned to feel a certain touch.
    
     It was early in the afternoon one day in a house my father could not afford. My father buckles me in my car seat. Irritated, as any other toddler, I kicked and screamed. I had a constant desire to know where my mother was. Unaware, I was on a new journey without her. Settling in the curiosity, I fell asleep in my car seat. I dreamt a sweet dream of being back home with my parents.
   At my age, I am now aware that my mother had left me. My father had dropped me off at my grandparents. They became my guardians, and I loved them. Restless nights haunted my toddler soul and bones. I cried myself to sleep in my grandfather's arms, rocking in a rocking chair. I dreamt a sweet dream of being back home with my parents.

     He was around the age of thirteen. Embezzled in basketball and video games, he was happy. The parents divorced years prior. Yet, his mother and father occupied him with gifts and gave attention.
   It was a weekend in the month of February, his birthday weekend. He was due to visit with his father. He was disappointed to acknowledge his father's car to never show up. His mother smiled, sadly. "He will come next weekend, sweetheart." Next weekend turned into the next month. The next month turned into the next year. The next year turned into five years, where he had finally returned..

     We swallowed abandonment to have never been digested. I twirled in the absence of my mother's departure. He caught the hurt by the neck and turned it inwards.
  He understood my grief, I understood his resentment. The mutual pain outlined the shape of us.  He nurtures my softly vacant heart, while I paint him pictures of new perspectives.

You have proceeded
You took everything from me
My sanity, hope, and happiness
You took my lungs
and I did not notice
because I was still infatuated
with loosing you
than loosing an ***** to help me breathe

K.K.

I want to possess a caress.
The nocturnal itch of *******
is tempting me to become insane.
Imagery of ligaments locked
is the focus of my brain.
May my sorrow only be gone
if I swing and dip into his hips?
No, it must not be so-
Men burnt these eyes of mine
with ugly cries.
I won't let you get your way tonight.

K.K.

My intuition spoke.
Separation was my vision.
I saw what is today, your departure.
I always knew the happy would not prolong.
It vibrated through the cracks of starvation from affection.
I tugged your leg as a child,
you tugged my heart a new beat.
I live in your silence.
How could you have done such a thing as to depart from me?

Love is not to be a confirmed code. Lust may embody what you think as love.
Neither is it to be defined.
Love is found in chemistry.
Maybe it's just the way his muscles undergo the act of holding not only her body, but her soul.
Or maybe, a man falls for a woman by simply her lips curled into a smile.
Our brains go wild, and we know when we know.

hesitance to accept my ever growing crush for a certain soul matured into a welcoming pain.
oh god, did I love her. she was the sun, loved by all, whom warmed beings that were once accumulated with glacial hearts. her laugh thawed my dispirit, her presence shaded light to a once overcast sight. it was forbidden to pursue her, the world said. yet, I clung to each touch of her lips which illustrated romance all over my skin. my heart stops beating when she leaves and continues the rhythm of a soft hymn the moment her body is pressed against mine again. tonight, i am missing her like a chopped thumb, a missing petal to a white rose, a winter without snow. a fresh heartbreak is on the way, I'm aware your love is intangible. For ****'s sake, in the meantime, kiss my skin...