Inside my body feels like chaos.
There seems to be no sense to what is happening.
I am aware on a conscious level that something is going on inside my mind and soul,
but I cannot access it.
It's as if the things that torment me are lurking in the dark,
purposefully causing me pain,
luring me into the darkness,
tempting me with the idea that discovery is possible,
all the while knowing that they will not reveal themselves to me.
Rather they slowly ****** me into their realm of darkness
and begin to trick my mind that the darkness is the only truth that exists.

Darkness is a strange thing really.
On the surface it doesn’t seem very appealing.
It is something that holds fear and danger
and torments many people when presented in an external explicit way.
When presented in an internal way,
this fear and danger does not,
however,
seem to send off the same kind of alarm bells that one would normally hear.
It would, in fact, appear as if the mind is somewhat
intrigued
by the shadows within itself
that drift around like smoke in a breeze.
It is as if this intrigue
is enough to safeguard against the potentially sinister depths of a tormented soul.

I am not immune from this
as I too find myself perpetually drawn into the dark crevices of my mind.
I can only hope
that my fragile heart
remembers that it was not always shattered by darkness
– but rather
that it is held together by the Light that exists at the core of my divinely given being.