i woke up this morning ******* from the night
before about something petty
my ***** itched from sweating all night
forgot to turn the heater off
passed out drunk, didn’t really forget

work called me in early
so i missed my morning ******* and ****
coffee was cold; who am i kidding the coffee was old

******* in korea with more threats, government bans
something else, electric is due and i’m tired as ****

work sent me home early
said i stunk from last night, who are they kidding
i’m still drunk

bomb went off in boston, who ******* knows who
did it, bunch of ******* wack jobs living in this country,
gun lovers, gun haters, baby lovers, baby haters, *** lovers,
*** haters, very few lovers of love but even they fight at
night when the shower runs out of hot water

all i know is my ***** are blue and stink with pain

a seed
that’s all it takes
just a seed
and some dirt
and some water
and eventually
a tree will
grow where,
once, nothing was

a seed

a seed
that’s all it takes
just a seed
and some death
and some tears
and eventually
fear will
grow where
once, nothing was

she showed me her heart that
day, freezing rain slapping
the roof relentlessly while
i picked through her defenses

as she showed me her heart
i showed her mine

one was beautiful
one was mine.

i hated king kong bundy
for so long
as a kid
for beating up
and hurting
hulk hogan

then i learned it
was fake
and i had
wasted all
this hate
on
nothing

fast
forward

i hated rachel
for so long
as a man
for beating up
and hurting
my heart

then i learned it
was fake
and i had
wasted all
this hate
on
nothing

fast
forward

it got better
i learned how to feel
i understood
what was real

I think of you late at night, as I do blood courses through my veins, and my brain turns fuzzy, and my temperature rises, and i feel the familiar call of lust on my tongue.
I want you. Badly. Nothing, will stop me.
And though you and me have died a thousand deaths in our inescapable clutches from the other,
I still stalk you, like you are my prey.
I am desperate.
I am dying.
I am inculpable of my actions.
Each time i capture you, you burn me, you scald me, you tear me, you rip me, you score your name on my chest 17 times with a razor-blade until, now....?
It is just an open wound. For i know you will return.
I am not proud of this. You are of great shame to me.
And You, You come to me, You want me so badly but can't let yourself, and you die a thousand deaths in your mental battles, trying not to want me, and it weakens you each time, the love-me-yes, love-me-nots....
You hold out your hands to me, and I claw my nails into you.
You pull away, You have won, this time.
I have lost today
But i don't feel any pain, just a sweet faint trickle of a  memory, of you being here.
You are my drug, and i am addicted,
and it hurts,
but man,
you feel too **** good.

Men who look like ferris wheels
every color representing different aspects of their personality

The first three words don't have to be beautiful
they just have to make sense
like connecting dots on paper

men who love with their fists
and hate with their mouths
who once were boys taking things apart
like remote controls their own fathers used to beat     Obedience into their small bodies.  Left them with a fury tattooed across their hearts
Just to give them the challenge of putting themselves back together

They buy their wive's flowers after
a four day bruise isn't so glaringly purple anymore
not so accusing-
kiss her broken ribs
and tell their children midnight stories

children trained as mood detectors
human robots
know when to shutup
speak when you are spoken to*

Men who speak like cutting boards
Every slice of the knives in their toungues leave
hollow aching missing parts
just to teach their children that not all
things can be put together once taken apart

whose daughter glues together the parts of old telephones
to spite the missing pieces
so every welt he beats into her bones
she sings herself unbroken
until she stands robust and imperfect
there are holes in her armour
but she holds it together

with her fathers fists.