The august heat
flows through her veins
his love and deceit
wash away with rain
The passion is lit
the wax gets colder
but not the wick
her weeps get bolder

i’m sorry that i held your hand. it wasn’t mine to hold.

i’m sorry if i hurt you when you knocked me out stone cold.

i’m sorry that i never told you thanks for all you’ve done.

you used to mean the world to me. you left. that world just spun.

we used to talk for hours about the future, here and now.

i used to look to you when i just didn’t know how

to deal with life eternal and face what i had become,

and the next day loomed before me, and my head just ached and swum.

i think you’d hate this poem cause the rhyming’s too cliche

for your post modern point of view that defines the words you say.

i think you’d like the idea of me missing you to death.

cause you’d like the way those memories catch my throat and steal my breath

i don’t hate myself anymore - that day did finally come.

i still wish you’d been with me when i got off that plane in rome.

i wish that you could see me now as i emerge from deep inside.

you could if you wanted to, but who am i kidding? you’ve just got too much pride.

so just sit there, ponder abstract things, think thoughts deep and profound.

pray to the universe. one day it just might come around.

i think of you now and again and wonder why on earth

i wasted so much time asking you what i was worth.

i think of you and sigh, and then i smile because i know

we’ll be at a stoplight one day and you’ll look out your car window

and see me in my car singing with my head held high

and you’ll think of who i used to be. and for the first time

in such a long time,

you’ll cry.

Blistered Heart
Written by:
Jessy Andrews
5-3-2010
1:34 PM CST
Poem 8

This pain is loud and very much alive.
I wish I could say I know not where it comes from.
But, I can’t. It’s made itself quite obvious.
I wish it would just let me go numb.

I know what it is. It’s the rock hard fist of reality.
Reminding me that it was me that made a decision.
One that needs to be followed through all the way.
Giving me absolute reason and leaving me with nothing to say.

Is my world falling apart?
Or is it just following the rhythm of this blistered heart?
I don’t like having to make tough decisions.
But, neither does anybody else that I’m aware of.

The Universe tells me the time to move on has come.
It tells me I’ll have the support that I’ll need.
So why must I still bleed?
Hardships said to be coming my way.

Only is it me that sees them only as an illusion.
A reflection of growing into the future self.
For a being that lives in the sunlight of the Now.
A reflection such as that is hard to swallow.

But it is the way of making this being more secure.
Secure in finally being my own person.
It is to the stars that I pray.
Pray for the strength to face this new vision that’s not so far away.

My time has come. My time is here.
To fulfill my own prophecy.
The one I’ve ran from. The one that has fed into my fear.
Burying myself so deep into the darkest of my shadow.

A claim to the energies of something chaotic.
No I must embrace them.
May the flame again rise in me.
Revitalizing this heart so blistered.

ÓMinistries of the Chaotic Publishing Inc.