Dear Prozac,
Thank you for saving my life.
Maybe one day, I will be a good wife.
Ill witted me, now singing softly.
Dear Xanax,
Thank you, for now I can breath.
Too much, and I can’t talk .
Just enough, I can barely walk.
Dear Adderall,
My favorite of the bunch,
For you always keep me up.
Grinding you in a powder,
To feel your mighty ******!
Dear Vyvanse,
Always necessary and prescribed,
When you can never eat,
Who needs bulimia nervosa?
The daily calories are in my mimosa
Dear Ambient,
Thank you for the sleep.
All the others make me wide-eyed.
With you, I feel the day, complete.
No longer I will be, a zombie.

How does it feel?
To be a girl,
And to bleed,
Whenever we create

Something beautiful.

The dunce cap
Fills the void;
Where the crown should be.

Life grew
And fed, from these *******
Now ripped apart,
Pieces of shame.

Judas’s Cradle,
Destroyed our flesh.
Left us humiliated,
Like Lady Godiva

Hours of ******
From impalement
In spite of Eve
Whom bit the apple.

Hot irons,
Through vitality’s tunnel
To fallow the holy book,
The Malleus Maleficarum.

Confession induced stoning
Drowning, burning
Just to be whipped like animals
For social bonding.

The battles of power
With the entertainment of ****,
Still two Hundred years of
Forced sterilization.




A pear of anguish,
For the miscarriages
A coffin,
For the son.

Who can be civil?
When survival
Even today,
Is about exploitation.

A dowry for obstetric fistula,
In Pakistan.
Under the union of god’s will,
Of course.

The ****** test
Out lives the Bison,
Only still being bred
For the hunt

Mutilation for those,
In Southern Sahara.
Huge abscesses,
To cover the curse.

The breaking wheel

Air whispers sweetly on my bare skin.
My breath feels deep with heat,
Repeating drum beats.
It’s bitter sweet.
How you always taste good to me.
Like summer heat’s salted kiss on my knees
Always feeling that swift breeze.
Watching you at ocean’s feet,
My closeted disposition, at your disposal
To feel, whenever you leave.
Will I be Ophelia today?
Week in my watery castle.
Or will I pretend like Joan of Arc,
As a woman to fight in battle?
At least sometimes, you will return to me
For your beloved pacific sea
Only to stay, until the tides change.
Then it will be,
My turn to leave.

The rich textures of the city
Dark tree shadows and the red brick rust

The bleak primaries of Venice
The sun sparked high contrast to the sidewalk grey

I was faded like the snow on the mountains,
A daily view on a clear day
I was not as high as the clouds
They were invisible as I floated away
Away, away, away,.


Everything was illuminated in the flashbulb of the disco ball
Later that night,
All alone and all complete
With the sound of utter tyrant,
Beating through my brains
Proving the physics of sound waves.

Last thing that he said was
“Thanks for loving me”
That’s all I wanted
Nothing deep
Just a condescending mirror
Of what my life could be

Bathtubs don’t work for quantum suicide
But every time I take one,
A part of me dies

What was nice under the crescent aglow?
Drunk on stars, or the moon lit show…

Ash of night, cradled what was once mine,
The repertoire of ever-syncing- jawlines.
Puissant is the chalice, its exaltation shined so bright,
Bestowed liberation underneath the chatoyant light,

The open windows left  niveous  fogs-
Breathed -stained –air,  against crystal *****.


Alive and one, under the entire earthly tempo,
Together left her organic imprints of art nouveau.
Beneath the warmth and petrichor ground,
The Lord and Lady commence to be crowned.
...Tree roots sink as veins of gods.
The serpent whispers his mellifluous facade...


The sharp shove of love’s first arrow
Lover’s spit, a seed for cupid’s bucolic furrow.
Scripture of Solomon’s *** temple of doom
All within the nicotine-stained-blue-infrared-bedroom,

Velvet allure, bellies of vigor,
The cold point, the pulled trigger.
Dance of Thelma, ancient cults of non-lovers
Feasting north, under the Horned God’s antlers.
The concoction of the widow’s deviated lust
Skins alive, the excited wolf-mans’ husk…

The gun’s mouth ex hailed bullets of smoke
Piercing hot wounds became tender lilts in up word strokes.
Still, they brought, perforating ice knives through the chest
Catching fades perpetually, just until two came abreast.
The shadow dalliance and hair pulls leave those weary,
The anise flower seeds sanction the suffering query.

What was once so beautiful at night?
Forgotten, as I turned red-haired-heathen in morning’s sight

So I take my hot bath, inure in my offing.
Emollient paean of the porcelain,
...which is my skin
See you, my ethereal being,
In short time spring will be fleeting

On Hands and knees, got stung by a bee
It landed on my wrist,  and then it fled
The sting didn’t hurt at all
In between the pretty leaves of fall
Yet ,Another walk in the park ,
Another sit under the tree
When I found the brother to the bee
It landed on me, and then, it fled
It left its sting inside me
I got back up and walked again
When the sting penetrated and began
Weak in the knees and on my hands
All because of the bee
The children waved tiny hands as the mothers turned their heads
That’s when I started to bleed
The hospital screamed in late night terror
It was all because of my pitiless error
Of walking in the park
Sitting under a tree
And letting my wrist get stung by a bee

Because of you, everything I touch,
Bleeds and turns to dust
I want to **** you first,
Because a broken blade singes, feels good with a ******

Against my wrist.

Your German tongue, I can't bare
Not a single word without a snare
Your Aryan sly,
Your black gutted soul.

Go away, I say
Go away,

You come as swiftly as you stay,
You bruited, withered man
I tried to burry you in the sand
With the Pacific ocean, we found sacred

Ah, to crush your brittle skull with my fair hands

The empty vessel that lies,
My brother's fears, my mother's tears
My sister's sorrow
Her disposition that fallows

Go away, I say
Go away, you shadow of a man

Your skin is already cankered
Your hair thin and gray
Spitting tobacco out the window
Passing by your old church


Your God you hold so sacred,
Hates what he sees naked.
How ironic,
As you fill your stomach, with gin and tonics


Your only son,  drenched in your malice
His confused identity, at your callus
Your worst fear, your biggest secret
I see what you left behind, in his tender cries

Your drunk is merely a symptom.

My mother's wisdom
Trying to gather strength to circulate the essence
Of her household kingdom,
Yet, destroyed at the presence

You left her, pavement scratched.

Busted blood vessels, continuous contusions
Led to the comfort of capsules
Trying to mend the thrash
Laying in front of her children on the hard, wooden floors

You demon of destruction
With death in your demise,

How your lover's family feels
As you dragged her heals
Into her watery grave
For you, it's not a worry; you think your God will save

Now it is time.
Take your pride,
The evil you hide.
As your golden ticket to hell

Alas, you’re dead
No fragmented memories shrouding my brain
No more drugs, no more pain
FREE, of the demented ways

I am the murderer now

As his shadow,
Wraps around my shadow.
Pitter-patter from my insides,
Spread vibrations on the walls.

In this mass continuity of space and earth combine,
I find my self-indulging within our time.

“Please don’t leave me,
You are my home.”

Chemical scent,
limbs silly
and bent.

“It’s only him, and every bit of
me “

Dripping down lustfully on my tongue
Like a sponge,
Absorbing all other compulsions, 

If Satan is god,
We will all prosper. 

Lingering in a broken nail.



And then...

I feel his bones,


Dangling, cold.

The mountains of lies,

staring up at open skies.

Vast, vibrant, in his eyes

So wide.

The secret keeper,

He is.

Bearer of all that is ,

All of me is his.

The secret keeper,

He is.

I just want to feel something again
To swim in your sin--
--Soured  little ginger bread house
Milk rips, pouring out your mouth
Suffice these shaking knees
Baby, Please ?

I love you so much it hurts

Drunk on star anise
You’re like a painting
I fail to complete.

My little boy
I wish I could corrupt
An innocent soul
Like you.


Stay with me
Lay with me
Be with me
My sweet boy

Circle around like
Dust and feathers
From the pillows
We meshed together

I want you to be the flower,
In the glass case;
No beauties can touch.
When you wither
I’ll just throw you away.

You have so much of me
And I of you, entangled in my grasp;
Still, I loathe your faults

All of the revulsion,
Fails to meet my
****** compulsions
Until I can chain you down
And have O gain revenge.

An angel high like you,
Falling in the mess I made

Will I ever be worthy,
Of your frothy tongue
Speaking those lovely sounds
Out of your chaste mouth?

You corrupted me
With your teeth

The bitterness
Once tasted sweet

Scissors to sharpen
They reopen my ****

Another whiplash
It cut so fast

Emptiness I found you
How bleak you are

Broke glass from the ceiling
To carve your smile

The demon's wife
Looks good
In white
Because she's always made to
Wear black

"Do you want to play a game”?
Said he,
On the verge of deceit

"Is it the one where you pretend to love me?"
Said she
Like a feral cat in heat

The milky sounds of his drunken slurs,
Only prove such love is fake.

With all the layers of paint
To hide the broken face
Yet enough to crack and peel away
To the raw layer of flesh,
Infested, Infected.

My mother did use to say,
"Nothing that fades is ever great".

I could of stayed, but I left at the new morning.
Grey skies blended in with the dock water and concrete building.  As I floated, staring up until it faded away in my ambient high.
The water suspended me in a warm blanket, as every hair drifted in slow motion . The universe cradled me at a stand still and finally this ***** of flesh pulled me down, down, down to my murky bottomless pit. In a womb of chlorine;  I left the world the same way I entered it, weightless, suffocated.

Things you said
Running through my head
It was a lie
At the end

Just another lie
I wanted to be true
I still loved you
At the end