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Katerina Oct 2013
She cries, she weeps every night in her sleep. You scream, you go why can't you just leave?
Leave me. Leave her. Leave them. Leave them so young to wonder what they did to push you away. Leave her to think about how if she was different, you would have stayed. Leave me. Give up on me. I don't care if you leave me. I've been left before. I've been given up on my entire life.
But how dare you stay and not try. Try and make everything right. Try and make it better. Even if it will be in vain. Fix it. Or at least try. What will sitting here screaming, yelling, and being angry do? They wont understand like I do. So leave. But you better know before you go, that I hate your very soul. And I will hate you everything You put her through. Everything you put them through. Just leave. Leave us already.
Katerina Oct 2013
I try hard. I try really hard. But obviously not hard enough. People see my smile and think, oh she is happy. The world sees my smile and thinks, oh she has a smile, let’s destroy it. But no one understands, that all my pain, my years of torture, all my scars, are hidden behind that smile. When you try to destroy my smile, you’re not just taking my smile. You’re taking another piece of my soul as you walk away laughing with your friends or satisfied with yourself. Do you know how bad it hurts? Well obviously you don’t, because if you did, you wouldn’t do it to anyone else. Why? Why do you try so hard to break what’s already been broken? Not fractured, not cracked, not bent, but broken. Why do you hate me? What did I ever do to you? I’ve avoided you. I didn’t say anything to you. I haven’t in my life. So why me? Does it make you feel better? When you see me crying, and you act like you care, is that part of your game? You can’t be two people. Do you not like me because I don’t worship you like everybody else? Because I’m honest and don’t just tell you what you want to hear? Well then I’m sorry. I’m sorry for being me. But I truly feel sorry for you. You’re so neglected and shamed of who you are that you need to take it out on me to get approval from you friends. I’d be your friend, even after the way you treated me. Because I know what it feels like. What it’s like to be forgotten, neglected, broken, lost, and tossed out.
Katerina Oct 2013
You stare at the heart in your hand as it beats. But you don't understand. You don't understand that it beats for you. So you stare, trying to comprehend. Trying to understand why this thing in your hand is so fragile, so weak. The reason is that it has been ripped out, stomped on, and broken. Yet I simply try to repair it and keep moving. Because if I didn't keep moving, i'd be stuck. Stuck reliving the terrible memories i try to push aside. You look at the heart i've placed in your hands, starting to see all the damage you never knew was there. Now understanding the reason you see it now, is that I'm trusting you with my secrets. Trusting you with my past. Trusting you with my heart. Please, don't betray my trust. Please don't add another ache to the heart i have given you. Beacuse, I'm not sure how much i can take. Until it will be too late.

— The End —