Gritty, ***** earth
I would make a space
Defined edges and lines
A plant for every place

I would water it daily
Returning from a run
On the way to fetch the mail
Soaking up the sun

Divots in dirt
Turn to flowers in earth
And fruit within weeks
But for all that it's worth

I'd tend to this land
Nurture it with time
All to see you
Pluck fruit fresh from the vine

When the room was clear and stage was dark
I felt a pang inside my heart
As I looked to where you used to be
I sighed a familiar sigh

The sigh that knows your name
But does not need to utter the syllables
Because even if it is not said
It knows that I sigh for you
I cry for you
I'd lie for you
But I hide from you
Every song I sing, I sing for you
Every love song, in soprano
Serenades in smoky rooms
With low voices whispering in your ear
Soothing you into a trance
If you come closer, you can hear
My yearning voice for you
You can almost feel
My light touch across you dance

I compare stories of every love 
I have ever heard
To our tale, in my mind
Like a kindergartner trying to cut out a picture
Based on a pattern held with stubby hands
I line the edges up just right and see what fits into us

Oh, I look around and hope you are there
To notice me
To think of me
To dream as I do
As if I were the only girl you had ever loved
The only girl you are capable of loving
The only girl you want
But what can I give you?

I've waited a long time
And I'm pretty sure I'd wait again
Because I'm your fool
A jester 
That's performing only for your applause
For you to admire from the first row
To clap your hands and shout "Bravo!"

I hated her
I used to
The way she silently scribbled of you
On used napkins with borrowed pens
Loving someone who would never return
It stung but she craved it
The rhymes helped with the burn

I hated the way that she cared
The way she held on
The way she was scared
Her lingering devotion
Hands tangled in wrought
Loved the way that she wrote
Hate the way that she thought

Now, I want to be her
Again, I always will be her
The one that documents asides
Of you, in the margins of my notebook
Of your curly thick locks
As they go from midnight to cloudy
As laugh lines settle
Into our seasoned smiles
As crow's feet form
On our twinkling eyes
I'll forever write of how you bewitch me

Oh and if we were the co-authors of this dear life,
What a beautiful ballad, together, we'd write!
And if it were left onto our hands
The world could then see the depth of our plans

But it is written by a maker more clever than we
Twists and turns in the works make us hold on to see
For He knows much better than you would or I
For our wants are decided, our needs are supplied

Something inside of me broke
I didn't feel the snap
Until the reaction spread
Like a cold pack
Hit against red brick

I lost myself
Inhaling and exhaling
Rapidly increasing
Accelerating
I couldn't stop
Sobbing
Trying to recapture
Composure
Clawing at the wall
Doubled over
Wide eyed

How long it had been
Sitting there alone
Terrified that you heard me
From the other end of the phone

Trapped in a screen
You set the scene
Se-er of constellations
Dreamer of dreams

Midnight confessions
Starstruck impressions
You tell the tale
You make your digressions

Roads turn to fork
Thumbtack on cork
I fear that you'll only
Live in your work

Sometimes it doesn't feel
Like you see me
When towards you I am walking
Just a beautiful voice
Sofly talking
A brassy Charlie Brown tone
You can't pick up the phone
Double texts make it look like I'm stalking

And sometimes it feels
Like I don't exist, I have gone
When you forget that I do
My mind's sketch I have drawn
My thoughts race on and on
Hard to remember I'm wrong
That you care, I get scared
You'll forget me for long

Or even worse to me
You'll never see my true self
Treat me like an antique
Place me high on a shelf
Go on living your life
I am there without touch
Occupied space
Overlooked much