Crushed, broken, thrown aside,
My heart gets tossed around with the tide.
The push and pull of what others want,
My own emotions I cannot flaunt.
I must stay strong for those who deserve,
My mind must stay clear, not swerve.
Bottled up, building and growing,
My anger and hurt I am stowing.

Crushed, broken, thrown around,
My soul is trapped and earthly bound.
Wanting and longing but holding back,
My life will always have something to lack.
For the ones I love I must not fall,
Myself I must push away all.

Crushed, broken, thrown  about,
My mind screams and I hear it shout.
Trying to speak but no words come,
My lips just become numb.

Crushed, broken, thrown far and long,
And yet, my facade still stays strong.

Forgive me if I like something,
Forgive me if it makes me happier,
Forgive me if it makes me feel a little special,
And I'm sorry I'm just not good enough for you.

Fading, fading, into black,
The dark envelopes my mind.
Stars turn misty and clarity is lost,
As I fall into the world of dreams.
Nothing can hurt me here,
Everything is calm and perfect.

Suddenly the evil rips through,
The smooth reflection of perfect dreams.
This world is invaded, disturbed, torn apart,
And I awake,
To yet another nightmare...

My santuary is has fallen down.
I need another way out,
Another way to become numb.
Somewhere where the hurt can't find me.

I need somewhere to hide,
Can I not help myself?
I just want my world of dreams again.

But that world is gone,
Nothing is left.

And I pray I'm not alone.

Strong, big, and there,
He made his presence known,
As he strode through the great plains,
That elephant's greatness shone.

Small, hidden and quiet,
She was generally inconspicuous,
As she ran along the dusty ground,
That mouse chose to make a fuss.

She didn't like his attitude,
The way he was so vain.
He didn't like how she challenged him,
And thought she was a pain.

But the mouse showed him up,
Oh she put him in his place!
And the elephant for a while,
Refused to show his face.

So the elephant learned his lesson,
And does his best to steer clear,
For the mouse knows,
That in him she installed fear.

My body is shutting down,
And I don't really care.
The bruises and cuts are hidden,
And my hunger doesn't show.
Crazy thoughts carry through my head,
But they are for only me.
Tears always dry,
Only I can feel them on my face,
I can't sleep most nights,
And the depressions wont leave.
So maybe If I just give up,
I won't have to endure through this anymore.

Up, down, left, right,
Happy, sad, loving, fight.
All around on a roller coaster,
My heart rages on.

Yes, no,
Maybe so.
Chasing ideas around and around,
My head erupts.

Wet to dry,
Rough then shine.
The scars have faded,
But the memories on my wrist remain.

I hate my body for fighting itself,
I hate myself for being this way.
I wish I wasnt broken,
And maybe I'm not but darling, whos to say?

She knew her rights,
She recited her veiws.
They crushed her down,
And she didn't understand.
She thought to herself,
"Why say how I feel,
If all I get is hated?"

There once was a girl in pain.
She sat in the pouring rain.
Away washed the flood,
All of her blood,
But still she sat in the rain...

L is how your name starts,
It's the begining of the emotions I feel.
I want to have an L time with you,
Rather than a short one.
Its funny how I can relate your name,
To practically everything,
You're my little light,
My L...

Who do you see me as?
Yesterday I was the girl in black,
Today I am an acquaintance,
Tomorrow maybe I'll be a friend.
Or perhaps you'll never know,
Who I really am.

I miss the way you hold me, and when you whisper in my ear.
I miss the way you kiss me, and chase away my fears.
I miss your deep blue eyes, how they gaze into my soul.
I miss seeing you from day to day,
And darling its taking its toll...

My soul is chained and,
I'm trapped.
****** to misery and fear,
Until a savior comes along,
And for a while I am free,
However I now fear to be alone...

The surface appears flat and smooth,
Perfect and untouched,
Silver and shiny.
I look and smile,
My life appears so good.
Then I see the tiny flaw.
And I just have to pick it all apart.

The purple stands strong,
My small but mighty rebellion.
I won't let anyone bully me,
Out of that which I love.
It is mine,
And you can't change me.

The blood has dried with the tears but forever remain the scars,
My imperfections on my wrist of love and anger,
I hate myself for what I've done but can't deny the pleasure.
Why can't I seem to save myself from what I've become?
And if would you still love me if you knew everything?

Moonlight filters through leaves,
Midnight hangs over my head.
The stars twinkle with soft light,
As I lay trying to sleep in my bed.

**** the insomnia that entraps me,
Making me stay up each night.
Just trying to get a peaceful sleep,
Oh, it is a fight.

Curse the nightmares that wake me up,
Leaving me gasping for a air.
The horrors that cloud my mind,
Play games that just arent fair.

They say,
To die is not the end, but rather another beginning.
And this,
is such a tempting prospect.

They say,
To die is a great adventure,
And I,
Do like to explore.

They say,
No one truly dies,
And I,
Fear there may be no release...

What would you see,
If you took a long walk,
Through my twisted mind?

Horrors and demons would jump,
And scare you from the shadows,
to chase you through the darkness.

However you might get the chance,
To see the little island of light,
Where happiness and dreams run rampant.

So there is a possibility that you might see,
Two different halves when walking,
Through my twisted mind.

Old tendencies creep,
back into my head.
Like old memories,
They dance around.
Old temptations float,
around in my brain.
Teasing and taunting,
Telling me to begin.
Old desires attack,
my heart.
And I fight,
Resisting what I once wanted.

Your eyes bring me sunshine,
Brightening my life.
Your smile warms my heart,
Scaring away my blues.
I love your arms around me,
Making me feel secure.
Your lips caress my skin,
And I feel alive.
Your voice gives me hope,
For my future of better days.

Your warm arms around me as I bury myself in your skin,
We hold eachother and smile, our young love in blossom.
My body aches and cries, how I long to have you with me,
But however hard we try, darling, together we cannot be free.

Your smell intoxicates me as I long to have you closer,
We try to break the laws of physics and inhabit one space.
My heart cries out for you and I cannot hide
But my secrets in you, my dear, I cannot confide.

Your deep, bright eyes envelope me and I just can't resist,
We gaze into eachother, forgetting the world around.
My spirit for you to keep as long as you love me so,
But take care of it love, for it is wild and fragile also.

Your voice whispers in my ear, sending shivers down my spine,
We share some words with meaning few and far between.
My mind is sharp and clear now that you've cleared my pain,
But be careful, dearest, for loss of it would bring red rain.