Selective hearing
and meaningless phrases,
Controlling degrees
of each minute detail,
Praise with obsession,
shamelessly stab –
Just give this some ease,
and throw me away.

Swollen eye sockets,
all work and no sleep,
Ten seconds of rest
before dawn comes again,
Egotistical nature
slashing inspiration -
See ya, I quit,
I only do wrong.

Bag my head,
and cut only a slit for my lungs to breathe.
Maybe purposely blinding myself
will ****** the sights that remind me.

You think I don't know
what it's like to hate someone
but miss them with everything inside of you
and realize that you don't actually hate them at all?
You think I don't understand the concept
of a contradicted soul?
But, you see,
the difference between me and you
is that the person I miss is worth so much more
than I think he'll ever understand,
and, if I had to,
I'd spend the rest of my life convincing him so.
But that will never happen,
since I'm not really here.

She looked at me,
so matter-of-fact-ly,
and the words came tumbling out with ease –
that if I don’t have a man in my life by age 30,
my life will surely be miserable. –
What has this world done to us?
Where is our independence?
These are the saddest words I’ve ever heard a child utter,
not because they are true,
but because she believes they are.

I don't want you to tell me I'm hot.
I just want you to care.

I don't want you to talk about my body.
I just want you to see inside.

I don't want to hear about her.
I just want to be comfortable again.

I don't want you to take advantage.
I just want you to miss me.

In this free fall
floating around me
is nothing but what has been
and what could be.
A thousand words I never said
are enticing whispers in my ear.
Too many screamers crying,
“You are worthless!”
But my soul bears a strong shield.
They can’t get to my heart anymore;
I know my worth.
The lies swirl in the mist around me,
a cloudy gaze of nevermore.
And I’m just comfortable in this free fall
to a place I don’t know.
So wherever this takes me,
can it please be adventurous?
I need some of that in my life,
a spontaneous mix of alive and thrilling.
So, when I land,
let’s just run.
Never stop and don’t look back
unless I run head on to past.
What am I supposed to face right now?
Where are you taking me?
I ache for the moment I land on two feet
and dash to the day of knowledge.

What is this place
that I can't seem to breathe,
like all natural reflexes in my body
undo themselves,
leaving me shivering?
It is fearsomely familiar.
Is my heart still pumping?
How am I still standing?
Have I met you before?
Can you see me?