i could never be alone,

but that's why i'm so terrified.

spiraling self-doubt under skylight.

to remember your face,

under every star my eyes could count.

i could never be alone,

but i changed when my mom died.

i can't handle the dark,

i can't inhale the air.

i can't take this place anymore.

but morbid curiosity keeps me livin',

and i've absorbed so much pain,

i've swallowed what terrifies me.

but i could never do it twice.

like a ghost, it pulls your head back,

breaks each peaceful lull it ever had,

like a marionette,

painfully obeying the lines,

without a voice to answer the crimes.

your brain, fairly weathered,

tying stones to your legs,

so that you might feel better,

but there is nothing quite soothing,

like your life turned into letters.

i won't miss your dumb hair,

i dont care about your nails,

i'd rather read books,

and dream about rails.

every seat you can't fit,

that i fake my upset,

but your soul is the point,

and your face is a mess.

recklessly leaving, windows opening,

sickly sounds, of doors are shutting,

infinitely holding on to corners,

hoping hard times are behind them,

and a whole new life behind quitting.

you've caught an uncomfortable man,

where nothing you do will oblige,

he'll predominantly be fine,

with a tall, glass of red wine.

and a wife made of air,

with an approval from peers,

let him loose and unwind.

with a mom pushing daisies,

raising hell in my folks, like a crazy,

feeling age in my bones,

spewing words on a screen,

holding on to world,

falling down in a drain,

crawling abominably,

fading somewhere happily.

whatever keeps you here,

healing despair,

i reach and you hear,

when i reach, you won't hear.

but whatever keeps you here.

i can fly while i text,

but the second we meet,

your life is swiped left,

the face of your screen is pressed,

but whatever keeps you here.

give up, in hopes you wont,

making a house out of foam,

filled with razorblades,

but you're only made of bones,

i hope you hold on to your phone,

and whatever keeps you here.

i belong in the covers,

friends won't see me yet,

im unwell adjacent,

some code adjacent,

break me from here.

i belong to each other,

im broken and lost.

swallow scabs and begin again.

don't let them get me,

im forever a place for them.