Ticking time bombs
   tick tick tick away

Bombs here,
Bombs there,
and everywhere

Below me,
Above me
Beside me
In me

Tick tick tick away
In my cold shriveled heart
Tick tick tick away

Waiting for that moment to burst
Explode

And all that is in me
And all that is around me
Will be destroyed with that
Tick tick tick boom

Life
Long
So nervous

Terrified

Want to cry
But I don't cry

Heart pounding
Beat
Beat beat
Beat

Sharp, rip, tear
Serrated knife
In
Slowly out
Inch by slow inch

He's here
She's here
She doesn't understand
He does
What the hell am I doing here?!
Putting myself through this sick
perverted
soap opera

I don't know if I like him
I am so incredibly scare that I'm going to hate him

So unintentional
But I already feel myself connecting

And preparing

Preparing to pull away once again

To love and love again,
with the eyes watching,
staring

Childhood secrets and imaginary pleasures
criticized for naivety by those
who have displaced the memories of a
long forgotten past

Who's insecurities double by the cynical
jealousy built up after
innocence has been torn to shreds

Seductive and approachable
this tree,
this swing
We all believe,
as children,
in that tire swings indestructibility

But
as it ages
and the rope withers from the weight
and frays like a spiders gossamer web
we witness the growth of a sad time

One slow piece at a time unravel
from lie after lie

Love lost several times

Everything holding the rope together
realizing that the end end is near

The tire snaps off and lays
in rest
among the dead and dying foliage
Abandoned,
years pass
and that old tire becomes caked
in dust and mud and
forgotten times

But
that rope still hangs there
swaying with the shifting moments of life
Waiting
waiting to be useful once again

There is only one use left for a lone rope
hanging from an old
and lonely
tree

A rope that offered hope and freedom
can do that one last time
A gift that can once again
release us from the pain
and the suffering
this world throws at us

That old tire swing rope
looped
circled
knotted
is now pure freedom

Standing on that old ***** tire
reaching
for that newly formed circle
Fit it
tighten it
release
and jump
Freedom
once again
because of that old tire swing noose

Too many people walk staring down
Watching their feet hit the pavement
Heel toe
Heel toe
Heel toe

It's all the same
Over and over again
Why is it so intimidating to look up?
Are we afraid that glancing forward will cause us to
   trip?

No
We watch our feet
Heel toe
Heel toe
Heel toe
We watch our feet out of fear of what we will see
   when other's see us

Have you ever looked into the eyes of a complete
   stranger intentionally?
Held that stare for mare than a second or two?
What we fear is their judgement
Because
For that extra second we hold their stare
We are
   evaluating them
   sizing them up
   giving them purpose
   or lack of it

That is what we fear
Their judgement
   than verdict

That they, this stranger sharing our path,
   will pound the gavel over our soul
And pronounce us guilty
   unaccepted
   wrong
   strange
   different
   condemned

Their judgement proves all too significant
It will be what defines us
That is why we stare down at our feet
As they go
Heel toe
Heel toe
Heel toe

Today I went rock climbing
Not like up the face of a mountain
But climbing over boulders
and over rock formations

It brought back memories of childhood
Racing from place to place
Pretending they were castles
Allocating different grooves as rooms
And lines as passageways

I tried to pretend again
Pretend I was running away from a dragon
Or running towards my love
But I couldn't do it anymore
I couldn't imagine separate castles
   and rooms
   and hallways

I couldn't see it
All I could see were rocks
Rocks that I know were once castles in the sky
That housed dragons
   and witches
   and princes

When did I grow up?
When did I lose my imagination?
We all say we will never grow up
But how many of us can imagine a boulder as a palace?

How many of us can still play with only dreams?