Tears of rain
Falling down
No one stops
Or asks a question
Not careing about your pain
Or trying to stop the rain
No one opens the door
Afraid to see what is not shown
What is never to far from a smile
Which soon turn to rain

I know you cry
and don't know what to say
I've been ther to
It'sto walk away
Nothing you've done causes this pain
I promise it's not your fault
You are not to blame
Keep on trying
Things can always be worse
I know it dosen't seem that way
I promise it will go away
Next time you wake up
Things might be the same
But when you look back
Many years to come
After saying good bye
To that some one you love
You might thank God
For getting you through
What you thought was the end
And ask to wear
Those shoes again

Thank you for loving me
And taking me in
The love you had given,
I continue to hold within

More Children you did not need,
But you took us in with your love unconditionally
In life dad you were loved so dearly,
In death that love stays the same

I breaks the hearts of so many to see you go,
But you did not leave alone
Pieces of all of us went with you,
The day God called you home

Life in not about what you can gain or of greed
It is about what you gave to those in need
A home and a safe place to be
You always gave this, alone with love to me

Rest now dad, as we say goodbye
We will see you again one day,
Standing by Gods side

This night is so dark
I never see the light
The money is what I need
I just want you to see
Please understand
It's so hard to resist
Jail is hell
I hope you never have to know
This pain I can't let it go
There is only one way
The way that I hate
I have to break my promise
Maybe I'll sell a dime
If I keep drivng
Driving across town
Maybe I'll sell a pound
It's the only way to stop the pain
I'm sorry I have to do this
I'm sorry little sis

I know we've been through alot
Done things we can not change
There's till a place in my heart
This place can not be erased
We've caused pain
We've hurt each other
You were my first love
That will never change
The plans we made
We can not fulfill
Dreams that I had
They can't come true
Now that you love someone new
I will have to deal
But always remember
I am here for you still

All the time we live together
I don't see
All the time we spend together
I can't hear you
All the time I pray
I don't get any closer
Is there something wrong with me
I hope someday I will see
I hope someday I will hear the words of wisdom
Maybe someday I will hold your hand
I pray that those days will be soon
Real soon

I cry when I sleep at night
I cry when I wake up to the morning light
I cry at the sound of tears
I cry at the sight of fears
I cry for the little ones,  who lose their loved ones
I cry to much for my family
Maybe I am not the only one who crys like this

This is my life
Thats hers

Bam- This is my brother
Shh- Thats hers

Bye- This is my sister
Hey sis- Thats hers

I'm sorry- This is my mom
I love you- Thats hers

Get out- This is my father
Hi baby girl- Thats hers

These are my tears
Thats her smile

On my birthday I have lots of memories
My first one is my birth
My next memories are of the parties
After are the drunks
The happy birthday calls, hugs, swats, and piches
But the best one is my 13th birthday
Walkng into school
Seeing my locker
The balloons and the friiends standing and waiting for me
Thats when I knew how much I am loved
By my friends

I'm calling
Can you not hear me
I'm hurting
Can you not see
I'm thinking to much
Can you not help me
I can't get out
Can you unlock the door
I can't break free
Can you use the key
I can't get out
Can you pull me along
Where does it go
I don't understand
How do I get help
What
Who s he
God
God please

Christianity is not fake
It's all real
There's nothing to worry about
You just have to kneal
Don't be scared or ashamed
Don't hide from your fears
Pray a simple prayer
He always hears
Don't be afraid of this world, or the things in it
Just pray and be done with it

It feels like a lifetime to wait
Just for you to be my man
Sometimes I just want to hug you
Thats when you push me away
I feel like a rubber band that is going to break
It hurts so much inside
I hide the hurt, pain, and anguish with a simple smile
A smile is supposed to make a lifetime of hurt go away
But the truth is, a smile is just a frown
Turned upside down

You loved me for me
You held me and cared
You wiped away my tears
Told me you would always be there
Two hearts were left bare
Then stomped into the ground
Leveled to dust
Because we both laid them down
We both broke us in two
But you will always have the half of my that will forever love you

I know I want you baby
Jump in and make you an me, us
We can make this work
I know it will be hard
Because sometimes you just seem so far
I hate being lonely
I hate being scared
I wish you sould be here to hold me
And show me how you care
I want to feel your touch
I want to see your face
And kiss your sweet lips
Bring you home and never let go
I want you baby
Please don't say no

So confused
So afraid
How can this be real
How do I deal
Now it will hurt to feel
Now is this a dream
When this day comes
When and what will I do
Will I smile
Will I shed some tears
No one will see
No one will hear
They avoid me
They don't know
I scare the ones I love
I hurt the ones who care
Then I will hide
Then I will cry
That's what I do best
That's where I am me
You don't know
The true me
You don't see the difference
What will become of me
What will I say
Can I change
Can I pray
No prayers with answers
No tears will you see
Pretending to be strong
Pretending is me
Crying in my room
Crying with no light
Is it sound proof
Is it not clear
Am I going to be ok
Am I the only one
When do I feel
What do I feel

She needs you
She crys
Please help her make due
Her family lies
They don't know
Tell her how to deal with it
They can't help her now
Don't let her be hurt
Bless Her lord
Let her carry your sword
You are her only chance
Stand in the gap
Help her carry the weight
It's so heavy on her back
No one else knows
You are who she trusts

Can you imagin the one who saved us
The one who cares
He holds us in his hands
He remembers everything about us
He's there whenwe sleep and hold our bears
When we cry those awful tears
We recall the pain and anguish
But wwe recall none of the joy and happiness
Where is our love
Why is it covered by hate

I am strong and brave
I wonder how long I will have to live
I hear so much terror
I see so much pain
I want to be happy I am strong and brave

I pretend to be the best
I feel so hurt
I touch life it's self
I worry about everything
I cry when concentrating on my real life and future
I a strong and brave

I understand what’s going on around me
I say things out of hatred
I dream of hate, shame, and pain
I hope I will change
I am strong and brave

You hurt me bad, mommy
I thought you would never know
When you cut your wrist, mommy
I did not wwant to let you go
Mommy, why did you do this
You know I love you so
When you hurt *****, mommy
You hurt me to
Bubby ran away, mommy
He couldn't stand the pain
So many things
You never took the blame
You took it out on them
When things didn't go your way
I had to be there
I just wnanted to stop their pain
I missed out on so much
Things I can not get back
For what you put us through
It hurt to love you
To see you drunk
Having men in bed
Not to know my father
Thinking hurt my head
The lies you told
I still hear today
What hurts the most
Your voice is not there to stay
Actions speak louder then words
Yours speaks loud and clear
I'm ok now, mommy
I forgave all those things
Taking care of you
Not a chore, but a full time job
You didn't see my tears
You never felt my fears
When I cried at night
You wouldn't open your eyes
Took care of myself
You never knew the pain I felt
I'm sick of feeling this way
There's nothing you can say
Somethings seperating us
You can't make it better or ok
I was the mom
You were the child

Why does it have to be like this
Why am I so different
I have an abusive mother
Why am I living this life
I have a broken family
Why am I am affected
I have a broken heart
Why am I so out of place
I'm so sad
Why is my brother so bruised
I can't deal with this
Why did my mother hurt us like this
I am only a teen
Why can't I love her as a normal kid should
I can't handle all this pain
Why does she hate us so much
I just want to be normal
Why
I ask myself these questions everyday
And come up with the same answer
God made me this way
But why...

The lord is here
Can you feel him
The holy words are there
Can you speak them
The bible is on the desk
Can you not read it
The lies are wrong
Can you see through them
The sheep are here
Can you rely on them
The walls are up
Can you pray them down
Instead you rely on the world
and the things in it
But you can just pray
And just love him

Daddy daddy please
I need some toys to play
You gave me everything
Please give them voices
For when my voice runs out
Theirs will carry on
Let them be like you and do as you do
Lets them accept me as you have
Let them make decissions
When we know the answers
Let them be different
Let them have a peronality that is only theirs
I will call them by their name
to your throan
The one's who hate me must leave
I will cry when they go
I will have some friends and several foes
To them I know
Will be rewarded
With wings
And other things
But mostly
with my Love

Standing beside each other
Even when you know their wrong

Holding on to one another
Trying to write a new song

You know what they do
It never does any good

Trying to push you
Knowing that you not strong

The pressure is so great
But you hesitate

You look in the direction
Where you know you belong

Hey try to decide
Tell you God is what you need

You’ve tried that road before
You don't want it no more

You only got hurt
Just trying to walk in the door

Do you really want to live like this
You can change
Do you really want to hurt
You can be different
Do you really want to rock yourself to sleep
You can be held
Do you really want to cry all day
You can smile
Do you really want to hate everyone
You can love
Do you really want to die
You can live
Do you really just want to be loved
You can

Through all those smies
You've taught me nothing
Through all those fears
You've taught me nothing
Through all those tears
You've taught me nothing
Through all those classes
You've taught me nothing
Through all those grades
You've taught me nothing
Through all those counsling sessions
You've taught me nothing
Through all those years you taught me
You raised me to be just like you
So how come you can't see how hard it is to be
You

Mommy think about this
Do you really understand
Do you know the consequences
This is not part of the master plan

I am supposed to be here
Please don't do this
Don't you want me to be near

I love you mommy
Do you not care
I am your baby
Your darling child

I am the one you will never replace
I want a chance at life
I will not be a disgrace
You will regreat this choice you are making
Maybe not not but soon

I knw you have had your heart broken
Mine has been cut into pieces
I face is gone
My beautiful eyes are distroyed

You need to say sorry
You hurt me bad
Why didi you do it
Was it a hard decision to make
You never even saw my face
I am sorry you took my life from me
I know you loved me anyway
For i am the only one who can know
Because I was inside of you

I hope to see you again someday
In the sky's far away
Awayfrom this place where my life was cut so short
Into your hands with tears no more

I am now here in heaven
Jesus holds me in his hands
He tells me you did not know
But you will soon understand