hummmm-

its there in her head, never ending, tonedeaf, dead
it buzzes without pause
it dims the yellow sneaking out of the small lamp by the side of her twin bed

on it she sits wearing nothing but covers, and the one bracelet made by her lover
it is silence, but it is so loud
the digital 2-4-2 stares at her as it has for what seems like hours

is it in her head, beneath her matted hair?
or outside behind the dark curtains?

with every bit that still exists, she shuts her eyes to sleep, counting each and every awkward sheep
if boredom has a voice
it is here now with a hum, talking from the deep

In the air
laulling calling tender laugh
foot prints in the grass
a steady stream
lumbering tumble bubble bath

In between
buzzing fuzzy feel
heart and eye heal

a steady stream
a steady stream

They opened their eyes to a rainy day
and even before the thought of sleep had gone away
the call to arms was heard, by all of man
with butterflies they each stood tall
rifles at the ready and with thoughts of home...

and of friends like you

the battle wore on red and cold
each side taking losses for one gained
and friends and lovers they lay slain
and lines they moved on, forward
each refusing to forgive

and the sky grew awfully dark

At home she sits alone as tears fall
with her eyes on the television set
Images of the war sweep across her face
the firefight and bomb's light illuminate
and her mind is on one man...

and out there in the night he is fighting

Through the smoke and night he picks the flight
for each little bird to sing it's song
and he pulls the trigger and paints the sky
and with a prayer he whispers her name
and he hopes to see her face again...

and she is crying

and the rain falls with the shells and the blood
And men And friends And lovers

At home she sits alone as tears fall
with her eyes on the television set
Images of the war sweep across her face
The firefight and bomb's light illuminate
And on her mind is one man

And the rain falls with the shells and the blood
And men And friends And lovers

a worn brush pulls down shadow
like a shade to night

creating form from light.

a worn expression of rough tone
and of a cool blue

a face appears in hugh.

in time forever captured
eyes of yellow brown

and lips curled together, in frown.

Children wake up
Mommies kiss their heads
Daddies go to work to make some money
Or Mommies do instead
We learn all that we can to be so smart
we eat our carrots to see in the dark

And the Darkness comes in at the end of each day
to signal the end of play
And we go to sleep again
And begin

Daddy said to play fair
Mommy always told me to remember and share
Don’t watch too much television
Say thank you for what you have been given
Eat your peas
don’t climb up tall trees.

And the Darkness comes in at the end of each day
to signal the end of play
And we go to sleep again
And begin

Mommy said don’t ask stupid questions
Daddy said just because
Read the instructions before use
Sit down, shut up
“the rules are the rules”
Don’t play with your food

And the Darkness comes in at the end of each day
to signal the end of play
And we go to sleep again
And begin

School said the world spins
Round and round about the sun
In a universe shot out of a gun
“a million to one”
Mommy said don’t have too much fun

And the Darkness comes in at the end of each day
to signal the end of play
And we go to sleep again
And begin

the dry creaking again stirs from behind-- just behind. It's touch-less grasp sends shivers up your side in an uncomfortable embrace. You are wrapped up, snuggled, in this cold. It burns. An abusive lover. One you love to hate.

Always.
Always right in your ear.
Whispering.
Whispering "truths" with a lying tongue.

The long descriptions lull you into complacency with creamy vocabulary, the comfort of steamed milk and espresso.

...and you dance with deception to a slow waltz.

You wonder to yourself where you learned how to dance like this, you must have always known it. It feels natural.

The rhythm feels like your heart beat.

You must have always known this.

Your thoughts feel like an echo your thoughts feel like an echo.

-you miss a beat-

Who said that?

Tighter the web weaves leaving little wiggle room. The room feels stale as the lights fade.

Something...

something slips your mind. Something you have always known. It dances too... just on the edge of consciousness. There at the end of the tunnel. Towards that light.

The Light.

Suddenly stumbling, your head spins. You feel a rush as the beat picks up. The steps are too fast to keep up -but you dance. Your head is heavy like waking from a thick drunk.

The Light tears into you. You glitter through the holes left by something from another life. You shine.

The others...
have stopped.
They notice you-

are different.

You are changed.

What was stale and dark now fresh and white.


The air is cold and fast. And comforting.

And it feels

feels like...



Love.

What is God?

Can i see Him? Do i feel Him? Is that His smell? That sweet taste, is that Him too? Does He speak to me- Is that Him i hear?

Do I swim through his running waters or fly in his ever expansive skies?

Is God one? or two? many or few?

Is God Day...
...Is God Night?


can He be both darkness and light?



is He a She?

is HE, ME?