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Joey Zimmerman Dec 2010
In a certain sense, you’re right
I led you on
I pulled the strings that guided your actions
Upon movie dates and way too many dinners
I could feel your feelings flail at me every time I drove you home
You were happy you found me…
Then the conversations slowly stopped
I stopped seeing you
I stopped answering calls
I stopped responding to texts
I stopped existing in your life
I stopped becoming a name in your daily sentences
You were sold on the idea that once I had *** with you multiple times
That my quest was over. My Journey was complete
Now I can fall down this empty pit
And be open to all the slurs and hatred you flail at me like used-to-be feelings
This is how you feel

This is how I am..
I stopped the war in our relationship
So I could focus on the Genocide that was constantly raging in my brain every time I was with you felt your heart beat and noticed it wasn’t in rhythm with mine
Like hers used to be…

Once upon an October I lost love
Regained it
Then was murdered by it in the summer
Although my name wasn’t in the obituaries
If there was a news paper for body parts
That’s where you’d find my heart

When she left I took her face
Like a serial killer
I ripped it off and tried to mask it over
All the girls that wanted to show me love on the weekends

They couldn’t fit her dress

They couldn’t fit her shoes

They couldn’t fit her smile

They couldn’t fit her body
You beautiful girls mean nothing to me

In the end
Yeah, I left you
Because I’m not a kid
I can’t keep playing pretend

You cried, yelled and slapped me
Yeah, I wanted to hit you back
For not understanding

So,
This goes to all of you
When you see me out about swept up in the nightlife that this town brings
Focus on the different girls that are at my side
And crop them out
Take a copy from my past and paste it on my present

Call me a man *****
Sometimes I can’t take it
I try and find  lost love in pointless ***
Call me a ****
That’s what you think I am
I haven't told anyone how haunted my brain is because of her
Call me an *******
Because I left when you needed me the most
Which I guess is worse than being connected to a lie detector
And asked the question, “Do you love her?”
Do you want proof on paper
Made from scratches about how much I don’t love you
Call me insane
Because I can’t let go of the past and everything
In my brain is pulsing because I still picture her in dreams

Or you can call me a child
Because I still like to play pretend
Joey Zimmerman Dec 2010
This is Christmas. Drowning in your small hometown, that’s so far away from the ocean but somehow it manages to be washed up. In this place that used to hold your baby fists and kissed your forehead when eager eyes grew sleepy. Between arms of friends, whose love limit is infinity and the one you used to love, who didn’t feel like staying anymore. I slit my heart into fractions and gave it to all my friends this year. The year is almost over…but there’s so much time left for fun. This is Christmas.
Joey Zimmerman Mar 2011
I appreciate the way things fall together, however most times I ignore the simple beauty of things and always look for a purpose.

Ken and I were driving the afternoon streets of Lincoln. Contemplating how prefect things would be if a chauffeur got behind the wheel and we wouldn’t have to balance a lighter fumbling between finger tips. We got a road filled with daily routines and places people need to go. Where do you need to go?

We were burning our way east down Vine street when girls turning from 33rd decided it would be nice to look our way and wave, “hey”. Now you know me…The woman driving the car was obviously paying her attention on the road (as she should be), but she wasn’t very attractive so things worked out. However, passenger and backseat were occupied by pretty girls looking eighteen with wide eyes and hands waving.

We tried passing phone numbers by illuminating fingers to clarify digits. This is where a chauffeur would come in handy because I can’t drive a car without any usable hands. But, like most things it didn’t work out and they needed to head left on 48th while I knew my car needed to keep going. They turned. And it was poignant. But I needed to keep going.

About five blocks later I turned around. Often times in life these good things linger for a while but then eventually pass. I’m part of the later party who recognizes its existence far after the time has been spent like most of my money on material moments. So don’t look me over while I’m trying to look for you. This is so like me. I turned on 48th street looking for something that I knew was well and gone. I couldn’t find a purpose…I’m not obsessed and this shouldn’t be looked upon as creepy, but I couldn’t understand the reason for these girls so, if you’re looking for me I’m on 48th street seeking a reason. There’s a tragic flaw for ya.
Joey Zimmerman Mar 2011
I appreciate the way things fall together, however most times I ignore the simple beauty of things and always look for a purpose.

Ken and I were driving the afternoon streets of Lincoln. Contemplating how prefect things would be if a chauffeur got behind the wheel and we wouldn’t have to balance a lighter fumbling between finger tips. We got a road filled with daily routines and places people need to go. Where do you need to go?

We were burning our way east down Vine street when girls turning from 33rd decided it would be nice to look our way and wave, “hey”. Now you know me…The woman driving the car was obviously paying her attention on the road (as she should be), but she wasn’t very attractive so things worked out. However, passenger and backseat were occupied by pretty girls looking eighteen with wide eyes and hands waving.

We tried passing phone numbers by illuminating fingers to clarify digits. This is where a chauffeur would come in handy because I can’t drive a car without any usable hands. But, like most things it didn’t work out and they needed to head left on 48th while I knew my car needed to keep going. They turned. And it was poignant. But I needed to keep going.

About five blocks later I turned around. Often times in life these good things linger for a while but then eventually pass. I’m part of the later party who recognizes its existence far after the time has been spent like most of my money on material moments. So don’t look me over while I’m trying to look for you. This is so like me. I turned on 48th street looking for something that I knew was well and gone. I couldn’t find a purpose…I’m not obsessed and this shouldn’t be looked upon as creepy, but I couldn’t understand the reason for these girls so, if you’re looking for me I’m on 48th street seeking a reason. There’s a tragic flaw for ya.
Joey Zimmerman Mar 2011
I appreciate the way things fall together. However, most times I ignore the simple beauty of things and always look for a purpose.

Ken and I were driving the afternoon streets of Lincoln. Contemplating how prefect things would be if a chauffeur got behind the wheel and we wouldn’t have to balance a lighter fumbling between finger tips. We got a road filled with daily routines and places people need to go. Where do you need to go?

We were burning our way east down Vine street when girls turning from 33rd decided it would be nice to look our way and wave, “hey”. Now you know me…The woman driving the car was obviously paying her attention on the road (as she should be), but she wasn’t very attractive so things worked out. However, passenger and backseat were occupied by pretty girls looking eighteen with wide eyes and hands waving.

We tried passing phone numbers by illuminating fingers to clarify digits. This is where a chauffeur would come in handy because I can’t drive a car without any usable hands. But, like most things, it didn’t work out and they needed to leave left on 48th while I knew my car needed to keep going. They turned. And it was poignant. I went straight.

About five blocks later I turned around. Often times in life these good things linger for a while but then eventually pass. I’m part of the later party who recognizes its existence far after the time has been spent like most of my money on material moments. So don’t look me over while I’m trying to look for you. This is so like me. I turned on 48th street looking for something that I knew was well and gone. I couldn’t find a purpose…I’m not obsessed and this shouldn’t be looked upon as creepy, but I couldn’t understand the reason for these girls so, if you’re looking for me I’m on 48th street seeking a reason. There’s a tragic flaw for ya.
Joey Zimmerman Dec 2010
It’s 11:57 on a Sunday night
Brunette hair
Sharing a bed with me
Where did it go
Hide and seek with time

Barely a second ago it was 11:56
Must’ve blinked
Time can skip
like
a
record
When you’re not paying attention
11:59
****, it’s almost tomorrow
A new day
And they say,
With each new day hope is restored

12:00
Yeah, no way
The sun will come up again
But everyone remembers yesterday
Hope isn’t restored
Everyone remembers my ****

I long for a time
12:00
On a Saturday
And nobody knows
Where I’m at
Joey Zimmerman Jan 2011
I’m your favorite kind of rain
That goes down a drain slowly like I can
Mimic your movements
Simply by asking you how you feel

Now, it doesn’t rain your favorite all the time
Most of the time I get this extra burden
But you’re my umbrella that’s keeping me dry
From stress, anger and despair
Pouring out from a raincloud called,  “Thing’s I don’t want to face today”

Let it pour
I know you’ll cover me from my problems
As long as I hold you up from yours
Joey Zimmerman Dec 2010
Hey how are you
Yeah it’s been quite some time
I haven’t talked to you in awhile
Just thought I’d drop by and uhhh….

I already had somewhat of a voicemail already planned
Because I knew you probably wouldn’t answer ha….

Umm
Where have you been?
Maybe I haven’t recognized the extreme changes of your character
Or if I did something that upset you
I put X’s on my calendar on the days I don’t see you
And you’ve already set the record with a couple of months straight
So I suggest you stop playing

Usually I just hang up when I hear the answering machine
Or wait till the beep because
I still like listening to you say, “I’ll call back”
But this time I knew I had so many things to say
I hope you listen to this but not just the first three seconds
And delete it

Now I can only hope at some magnificent time
My phone will go off and illuminate your name over caller ID
Showing how you’re trying to reach me
For what ever purpose
To ask me how I am….or
To bring me down
And finally lay me to rest
With closure

Hey umm I hope I see you soon
I love you
Goodbye
Joey Zimmerman Dec 2010
I seem to be a broken radiator
Not one that generates heat
Throughout the room
But one that used to explode with light

You made me so warm
My eyes would melt and drip to the floor
So I could look at insignificant things
More closely

I found what you thought of me down there
Between the floor boards
It was dusty and unloved
So I left it
Joey Zimmerman Dec 2010
Ugggh
Why?
It’s a ******* Tuesday
Who does this on a Tuesday
With someone else in the room
Who can hear
EVERYTHING
That’s going on
I know it’s your girl friend and you haven’t seen her in two days
But sweet ****
I feel so awkward

“Shhh, it’s okay. He’s asleep.”
Yeah, *******
I wanna ask him how that test went
Or if he got that hot girls number in the elevator
Something to stir the mood
Something to stop the possible pregnancy
That’s happening twenty feet away from me

Where am I supposed to go?
The lobby?
Sleep on the couch?
Yeah, **** that

I should take a needle
And poke holes in all his condoms….
What kind of human being would I be after
Completing such a wretched task
God, that was such an evil thought

Then, just as quickly as the began…
The springs suddenly grew silent
I was confused
But I didn’t want to turn around and look
I just waited
Till ultimately I heart my roommate whisper
“Sorry”
Joey Zimmerman Dec 2010
Did I push you away
With all my heavy words
Accused of stealing
A feather
Blame me for why
You can’t fly

You’re turning mere thoughts
Into marathons
Take a breather
Though each breath you undergo
Absorbs air from my pleading lungs

Do you want me to push you
So you can fall twenty seven stories
And by the time you fall past ten
You’ll understand what you want
Turn my pockets inside
Out of time
Now, just another crack on the pavement

Take the stitches out of
My skin like words
Complicated curves
The mural on my back
Stained by an idea
That grew in your head
It’s now what you believe
And it’s become who I am

How you think, lays boulders on my spine
Give me a break

— The End —