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Jessy Sivilien Oct 2011
Shades of Grey

I stare at the mirror
At my silent tears
Trailing down my cheeks
A failure in my eyes
So I look away
They think they know me
By the lies I whisper in their ears
But its my actions that speak
Louder than words
And while shadows of hate
Alter my reality
I die a little more inside
locked up in my own prison
Winter has come earlier this year
And the ice cold wind
Cuts through the broken glass
With new recognition I see
The shades of grey
Of my life
Jessy Sivilien Oct 2011
Darkness
Waiting on the edge
Shattered glass
From a fragile heart
Broken shards
Piercing
Blood flows
My vision
Tainted with red
Shades of grey
Melt
Into shadows of yesterday
Creeping in
Haunting my memory
I won the battle
Lost a war
Close my eyes
And welcome
darkness
Jessy Sivilien Oct 2011
The mirror stares back
Who are you
I see
Dark eyes full of emotion
Probing
Searching for meaning
A defeated stance
A tortured soul
I hear
A suffocating heart
Writhing and screaming
And pounding
Silent words
Flow from your mouth
I want out
You say
I agree- don’t we all
The real truth
What do you see
I see
A thin line
between words and wounds
A silent pain
A thin line between
You and me
Transparent
I hear
Your cry for help
The darkness
Pulling me under
Creeping in
Swirling around you and I
Everyday
Closer and closer
Jessy Sivilien Oct 2011
I have
Many sides of myself
                   Of my soul
Facets of my mind
Not visible
But they’ll never see
It was necessary to hide
   A weakness
The longing
     For perfection
   For love
     For acceptance
The insecure child
Whose eyes are haunted
Overshadowed eternally
By her twin
Whose confidence borders arrogance
Laughs and struts
             And smiles
The cousin
Whose tear streaked face
Becomes cold
Like her heart
And anger boils
     Watching
         And waiting
  For the friend
Whose pen flows with thoughts
Better left unsaid
Whose intensity
      Frowned upon
   Mocked
Binds her pieces together
The many sides of herself
                         Of her soul
   Facets of her mind
Not visible
Because they’ll never see
  The puzzle
That keeps her alive
   But kills
Who I Am

— The End —