I have tried suicide
Something in me had replied
This isn't to be taken lightly my dear
You shine to brightly
Today isn't your death
Tomorrow won't be either
The scars will be your reminder

Oh god
Staring blankly
Feeling ecstasy
Body ...moving uncontrollably
You did this
Made me feel
Look into my eyes
Scream my name
Hold me tightly

Rain on the roof
Wind
House roaring
Talking on phone with my love
Music
Dancing freely
Creating smiles
Giggling uncontrollably
Skin touching
Reaching for my favorite things
Eyes seeing deep into me
  Past the scars, past the hurt
Seeing me

I see you see me
Familiar, unforgetting
Like a child coming home
Every fault in my crack
Every line in my detail
I see me beautiful

Rain on the roof
Wind
House roaring
Talking on phone with my love
Music
Dancing freely
Creating smiles
Giggling uncontrollably
Skin touching
Reaching for my favorite things
Eyes seeing deep into me
  Past the scars, past the hurt
Seeing me

A smirk
A grin
A stare
The flare
Headroll into your yearning glare
Eyes glazed over with lust

I don't title

Helping angry
Angry gets angrier
Leave angry be
Sulk in your sorrow trying to help
Leave angry be

I fell warm and fuzzy in my ears
Favorite music blaring
Drowning out this intolerable world
Body moves fluidly
Every beat more and more
Bringing me up
Now warm and fuzzy inside
Eyes closed
Feeling music
Moving in sync with the beat
Happy inside
I don't hear outside
The music inside my soul

White screen
****
Brightness steals my word
To write, spill my words farce
I forgot
Technology took
them from me
Too many log ins
Too many passwords
Something..love
Mostly hate.
I do not belong here in this techno gate.
Next time I will write them and be straight.


Ministry songs
in my head