"You need this...
Just let your mind relax..."

My body keeps telling me
As I sit here
My eyes drooping
As my mind goes fuzzy

Fighting the urge
To take a snooze
Is no easy task
Because you'll usually lose

But I must do it
The thoughts in my head
Will just become more livid
If I let myself slip unconscious

Because although thoughts flash
Across the mind
When they turn to dreams
It's a continuous stream

But maybe I can doze
For just five minutes?
No I can't
Because it won't end there

I must stay awake
It's the only choice
At least the one that makes
The most sense

But alas, it's no use
It's overpowering yet again
I'll close my eyes, and go to sleep
Just to wake up again

This time maybe
My mind will take flight
And show what I want
Not what I fear.

Lying there
day after day
Sun up, sun down
Same old routine

Children poking fingers
Banging on the glass
Pressing their ugly noses
Into the only space you call your own

Thus is the life of a zoo animal
Living in cages and tanks
Detached from the rest of the world
Longing to be free

Often I find myself
In the same scenario
Behind imaginary bars
All by myself

As life goes on
I'm stuck here
Repeating patterns
And longing to be free

But slowly and surely
I am breaking free
From these bars
That have burdened me

It's like a poison
creeping through your body
you don't know what it is
but it's causing you harm

it's squeezing your head
so you can't see straight
making it pulse
and pound in your ears

you clench your fists
and hold your breath
as the invisible monster
devours its prey

You do all that you can
to prevent yourself from exploding
There's nothing you can do though
Until the monster has had enough

As the venom is released
your body relaxes
and your mind is at ease
until the next inferior visit

I stare out the window
And watch
As the trees, sky, clouds
Go passing by

And I long so much
To sit
Out underneath the wide,
Never ending sky

To let the white,
Jet puffed marshmallow clouds
Drift over my head
At their own pace

The fresh air
Gently sweeping over the area
Blowing through my hair
Like a wild mustang
When it runs

The pictures I take
Don’t come close
To capturing the real beauty
But it’s better than nothing

As I sit here in the backseat
With my family
And even though I am similar
I am completely different

So for now, I just ride
Thoughts fly free
Inside my head
The open spaces I see
Are just through the window.

The sweet sound of silence
Lingers in the air
As the house is emptied
For all but me

A time to relax
And take things easy
Do things at my pace
And not deal with demands

Music starts to fill the silence
As the beat has me moving,
Shaking my stress away
And i am at total peace

Four o clock rolls around
Things get a little stressful
But only barely
As little brother comes home

Reading is his favorite hobby
As is sitting and listening
To his older sister
As she engulfs them into a faraway land

But all the while
A sense of relaxation is present
But when the phone rings
Is when the tension comes knocking again

But give it a while
And the tension simmers
And eventually
It once again goes away
As we go our separate ways

The wind rustling the leaves
And the crickets playing a song
brings peace to my ears
it's tranquility soothes my soul

It takes me away
to a faraway place
where the time does not fly
and stress is non existent

a place that is seldom traveled to
for the turmoils of life
make us forget about
finer aspects

so just sit back
and enjoy nature
the sounds and sights
and the way it surrounds you

because the stress will subside
and the peace will overcome
if you just breathe in the air
and let it take control

I sit and I watch
As the rain comes falling
Listening to the thunder boom
and the howling winds

And I think about those
Who hate the rain
Who claim that it's a boring day
Because they can't do anything

Well I've got something to say
Maybe a new thought to you
This comes as a shock
But weather has feelings too

The weather gets sad too
Just like humans
That's why it rains
They're tears coming down

A comparison would be
That for it to be sunny all the time
Would mean for us
That we have to be happy all the time

That rarely happens
For humans or weather
We just have to run emotions
Because that keeps us healthy

So next time it rains
Just remember this
Let weather run its course
It's just natural

A rainy day is a time to relax
Take advantage of it
Now if you'll excuse me
I'm going back to my outdoor symphony

spinning around and around
getting dizzier every step
don't know up from down
it's all just a blur

marshmallow clouds
float in a caramel sky
as lemon drops fall
into a chocolate river

nothing is as it seems
reality drifts away
as fantasy kicks in
perhaps to provide safety

safety from emotions
that whirl around the head
all seem to be morphing
into one big ball of chaos

the chaos leads to
tuning everything out
so thus she creates
her own little world

She sits there
At the desk
Her head spinning
As it begins

Day in and day out
All she ever feels
Is the feeling
Of being everything

She's underappreciated,
And under rested.
She's overtired,
And overworked

Her friends are the only ones
Who appreciate her
For who she is
Not what she does

They're the reason why
She’s still hanging on
To that rope she's clinging to
That just keeps fraying.

Sometimes she just feels
Like she's nothing at all
Or even worse-
Like the energizer bunny

She keeps going and going
But not on her own terms
There’s always something that needs to get done
And it's up to her to do it

What she wants to do
Keeps getting put on hold-
Things that she needs to do
Take a number and wait in line

She feels empty
Like she's nothing at all
She’s running on autopilot
And it’s running her life


Even sleeping doesn’t help
For the horrid dreams kick in
But I guess when you're on automatic
Nothing seems right

But yet there's hope
That keeps peeking through
This dark soul
That has engulfed me

For as long as I have a heart
That continues to beat
My soul can remain pure
Even if no one can see

Friends
Best Friends
Truer than true friends
Forever friends

Or so i thought

But sitting here now
Looking over
What we had
Wondering what the hell happened

I've done so much for you
And what do i get?
The back end of the burner
And the short end of the stick

You just don't get it
Do you?
You don't get why i'm upset
And you probably never will

Truth is
You care more about your new "friends"
Than you do
About the one who's helped you the most

If i ask you anything about one of "them"
You'd know it off the top of your head
But when you mention me
You don't even remember my age

You give off the wrong impression of me
And mock me in front of friends
Don't you think that hurts?
Do you have that little respect of me?

I may as well not be here
Because that is how I feel
That i am just some rag doll
That you just push to the side

But you wanna know something
One day you're gonna be in trouble
And the only one who'll be able to help
Will be me

But you know what?
I won't come to your rescue
Because the friendship we had
Was your loss, not mine

The creativity that once
Flowed through the mind
Like the wind through the trees
And the blood through the veins

Has taken a back seat
As the mind is now full
Of things that take priority
In regaining sanity and peace

A war has erupted
And being stuck in the middle
Is proving to be
No easy chore

What qualifies as being more important?
Moving forward for one's self
Or helping others to do so?
All comes down to the state of mind

The conscience is the ultimate answer
For listening holds the key
Whichever path it chooses
Is surely the right answer
Isn't it?

It echoes off the wall
But yet, there is no noise
It screams in the night
But is quieter than a whisper

It's the sound of being alone
Not knowing who you are
What you'll become
Or what you're worth

Always questioning
And over-thinking
Driving yourself crazy
With every waking moment

Control yourself girl
Seems like it's hard to do
But think about it
You're your own worst enemy

You can do anything
Just put your mind to it
You don't need anybody
But you need everybody

Keep those who are close
as close as can be
and those who are loose
just weren't meant to be

You can tell
who is who
Because those who aren't
won't fight for you

So relax girl
you're doing just fine
Because you are loved
And that can never be changed.