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Jenn Yeo Sep 2014
Cant breathe, cant sleep, cant look in mirrors or peoples eyes.
Can't walk, cant talk because it never comes out right.
Never comfortable, always aching and don't forget I'm shaking
Can't focus or eat right, even close my eyes for peace.
All these things race through my head and they never seem to leave.
My heart physically hurts and my head feels so full.
Losing interest, hard to care anymore.
Can't sit comfortably and can't listen too well.
This isn't living so it must be hell.
Constantly feel like I'm going to be sick.
I want to rip things to shreds preferably my own skin.
Drained of all energy, left empty, left cold.
I'm so young yet it I feel so ******* old.
My head is a war zone and talking gives me headaches.
Trust me I've tried there's no way to escape.
This isn't anything new, it's been years.
This is depression. Nothing romantic to hear.
This is all happening at once so I wrote it down goodbye.
Jenn Yeo Sep 2014
You stopped caring
about everything you had once loved
(Especially me)
Jenn Yeo Sep 2014
I am screaming
Screaming so hard my throat is raw and throbbing
That my lips are dry, cracked and bleeding
Screaming filled with such agony within me
So loud my lungs will collapse any moment  
Screaming with such force my eyes begin to burn
That my body is left shaking and sore
Here I am screaming and you sit beside me
And all you hear is silence
This isn't poetry, this is just the truth.
Jenn Yeo Sep 2014
I'm falling apart faster than I ever have before and the only person who can save me can barely say my name.
I know you'd argue that you offer your help but even then what am I to say?
That I can barely look in the mirror because you can't bare look at me?
That I find it hard to talk because you don't want to hear me speak?
You know that I'm in pain but you have nothing to say?
When I go to touch you, you just pull away?
You don't look in my eyes, you hardly smile anymore
but with anyone else you seem happier than I've seen you before.
So what should I say when you ask me again?
That the person I value most in the world is beginning to put us to an end.
I hate myself so much and I'm sorry I've ruined everything. I don't know what to do anymore.
Jenn Yeo Sep 2014
In that moment my heart stopped and the world stopped along with it
I never knew silence could be so terrifying
I tried to breathe but oxygen wasn't there
I was empty
When I came back to reality it hit me like crashing wave
It left my head spinning and my mouth dry
I finally understood the words my father had said to me with his voice shaking
I'm so sorry
Tears streamed down my face that burned my skin
I reached out but nothing was there to grab
I felt although I was drowning
How could you **** me like this?
Maybe my problem was I saw beauty in storms
and you were the biggest storm I ever saw
I chased you, I loved you
But you destroyed me
And worse yet your storm never died down completely
I still feel gusts of wind from time to time
I hear you in the rustling of the trees and I still do not hide
I am so terribly broken
So how do you heal when you can't clean up the mess
parts of you dying and parts of you dead
I will not appear strong for I can no longer pretend
*goodbye
Jenn Yeo Sep 2014
Sorry for writing so much but I finally had things to say
I bet I had convinced you I was actually okay
Jenn Yeo Sep 2014
Believe me when I say I'm not pleased with myself that I've ruined your favourite lyrics, songs and hell maybe even your favourite albums.
That you can't eat or sleep without thinking of me.
or you hate morning, noon and night because you've seen me at all three.
There's no where you can go to escape the thoughts, I've been everywhere and said everything and I remind you of all you lost.
I don't smile at the thought that I'm engraved in your head and your skin and anything else I've ever touched
or that you can't feel anything at all or you feel way too much
I'm not happy that if it doesn't have anything to me you wish that it did
That when you think I've left you here I come again
I'm sorry I've poisoned your veins, I'm sorry I'm in your brain, I'm sorry you can't forget about me.
I wish I could forget me too.
I wish I was dead for me and for you.
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