Writing shity little poetry in this luxurious home,  it's not mine but who would have known. It doesn't really matter where I write
It's just my feelings pouring out from from the  inside
But sometimes there not my feelings at all
And for some they say I shouldn't write it at all
It may not get me anywhere in life but it is just really nice to sit down and write
Just to move people's feelings from here to there is like a super power I possess with just speaking out some air
So am I going to stop writing?  
Probably not,  I am going to do it weather you like it or not

In this day in age its hard to not care what people think.
You try and try to not care, and do not get me wrong it gets easier to take the insults and narky looks. That does not always change how you feel at the end of the day. You are still filled with hurt. Still worried if he or she likes you, and if not at least wanting them to. Striving for acceptance, but yet still striving for that unique touch. You can go on pretending but it does not change the facts.
But for now I can do my best.

Your so close yet so far away
I look into your eyes and see clouds clogging filled up with grey  
There is confusion but that is all i can see
Are you still there driving on or somewhere off the the pretty lined road
You can come back ill guide you your way
I just need your trust
Trust me like your dying and ill catch when you fall
Ill rest your head on my shoulder while i soak up your tears
Come back because I know your stuck
I am angry but that doesn’t mean ill leave
Come back to me and I promise you will always have WE

Can the heart and mind function as one
Or are they forever facing a constants battle of who's right and who's wrong
The hearts always saying sorry by sending constant gifts of life
The brain trys its best to protect the heart from the evil mist
They try to do their best but just fed up by trying to make do
One knows what right and one just feels what's right  to do.  
So is it wrong or is it right?

Stop putting me down like you haven't done it before,  my heart screams out for you when you head towards that door.
I act like I'm strong but I'm breaking down in side.  You say we can be friends but I think I'd rather hide.  I just want you to be mine even more than before,  is that because your leaving and think I'm a bore?  Do you already like her more than you like me,  because there was a time when you talked bad about her to her very core.  I know I was kind and gave you all you asked for but I guess you didn't want to open up my laborious minds door.  I wish you could stay but they all leave in the end,  I guess it am just forever stuck with the pretend.

I have never been anyone's first choice
But why would anyone want me to be
If they knew I knew would it make them change the way they think of me
Or would they lie to me like they do day to day
I can't seem to let this vile though ht escape throughout the ears connecting to the brain
Just to be thought of day to day but there is no more rooms left in the hearts now a days
I can't be cramped up with a charlie horse lingering around
I am just a pretty little flower but nobody's ruby red roses anyhow
Just under dressed while living in this distress
With thoughts of suicide hanging them self at the roof of my doorstep
If no one loves me now no one will love me in the times I will condone
The thoughts of sharp razor blades seem to reep into my skin
We get excited to travel the world but not for traveling someone within
I just want to be put first even if only for a day
I want to drown in the love and affection even if I can not breathe
Just simply someone standing next to me would put me at the greatest of ease

i just want you to come back
i am tired of pretending like you don't exist
like i don't hurt  from all of this
you cant just not think of as from time to time
we had the best moment from the good to the bad
i may have ****** you over but i did so much more good than bad
i was there for you when your life was the worst and then you leave me when everything starts to work out
i doubt that you regret it
but i doubt you would come back if you didn't some how
i went from knowing about every aspect about you to knowing nothing about how you feel and that i think is what kills me the most.
just come back even just once to tell me goodbye.
i just want a goodbye.