Come back.
Please stay.
Don't leave.
Don't go.
Don't runaway.
Don't disappear.
Don't fade
Don't waste away.
Stay in my arms.
Stay in my bed.
Don't slip away.
Please.
Love me.

My coffee was cold.
The coffee I watched drip by for what felt like hours.
Wasting time on hot coffee that'll just be left out for the cold anyway.
I loved the steam.
Seeping down into my lungs.
Brushing gently down my throat.
Filling my insides with sweet ecstasy.
Almost burning.
Almost painful.
Almost.
Almost completely suffocating.
The crisp edges of books.
Spread across the room like a fallen army in the war of my mourning and sorrow.
In the bitter ignorance of my charred heart.
Not even able to apologize.
Sweeping down into the abyss of this lonely one bedroom apartment.
With only the ticking of the clock.
Who has clocks anymore?
To many bad memories.
To many reminders of bad times.
Times that are bad.
Times that were bad.
Times wasting.
Time wasted.
Even all of these winter blankets.
White and paisley golden sheets.
Lit curtains.
Gentle pillows.
Couldn't keep me warm.
The insides were cold.
Like a child lost in the park on a dark brisk winter night.
Not cold because of the snow hovering above his knees.
But because of the lost empty kiss from his warmhearted mother.
Buried beneath blankets of ice.
Empty chest.
Swollen *******.
The feeling of something or someone missing.
The tocks missing from the ticks.
The melody missing from the song.
The sugar missing from the tea.
The sunlight missing from the sun.
The tears missing from my weeping.
Balling up.
Knees to chest.
The doors unlocked.
The windows left open.
Pulling me under deeper and deeper into my sheets.
The oven burning what's left over of our last meal.
The parts that didn't end up on the ceiling and throughout the floor.
Spreading hard suffocating stench into the vents.
Let me burn.
Where's my company?

In the flames.

Her eyes on my skin.
Burning through layers of flesh and bone with each glare and bat.
Hot tea whistling into steamy rooms.
Creeping around the corners.
Blowing fresh orange citrus into my lungs.
Warming my blood.
Boiling hers.
Rustled sheets lying on the floor.
Cold bed.
Hardening pillows.
Morning dew running dry.
Cigarettes and coffee that used to keep me company.
Lost in your company for me.
Cold chills up my spine.
Screeching like nails against blackboards.
I lean in.
Stealing a kiss before you turn away.
It was one.
This time I didn't bother going in for two.
Or four.
Or ten.
You didn't bother stopping the faucet from dripping.
You didn't twitch with uneasiness.
I didn't go mad by the oddness of our love between warm lips.
My body pulls away.
Rejecting your hand from mine.
And every little thing I used to love about you
Bothers me somehow.
Our dreams.
Wrapped in paper.
Covered in white.
And laid out in real stars.
Tied together with a silver ribbon of light.
Now dripping in oil and black paint.
Ripped up.
Thrown into the flames.
Streaming ablaze like moths.
Like powdered butterfly wings in hot coal.
Black smoke.
Filing away at my outsides.
Pulling out pieces of hair you used to run your fingers through gently as I cried.
Spreading oceans to your lap.
Swimming with the creatures of the dry ground.
Floating on the waves until we drown.
Falling to the floor in heaps of spirals.
Falling to my knees.
Feeling the wet mud beneath me.
Pulling me under slowly.
The soft rays once glistening on our bed.
Caressing your face.
Your sweet lips gently on my thighs at Night when your bare body calls to mine.
Turned to darkness.
To the space in-between.
To the lies resting into my ribs.
Contracting inside.
Ripping away at everything living.
Keeping my chest afloat inside of me.
I kiss your feet for what seems like forever.
With one last breath escaping my lips as the water boils over.
As the ashes fill the air of crisp moth wings once before.
As the last song from the last bluejay blisters out.

Desolé mon amour.

Kicking up.
Pushing me under the bottom sole of her feet.
Sinking in deep.
With only a second of suffocation.
I fall through.
Out of the childish dream.
Of forever love.
Into reality once more.

To think i actually cared at one point.
It's pathetic, you've always been that.
Like a child scraping their knee, talking about booboos for days.
To say i loved you at one point.
It's pathetic.
The word i love most because it describes anything we had once.
The word, who's face so stunningly glorious.
You laugh and smile in my presence.
At the thought of me?
At the thought of someone who actually cared for you?
Is pathetic.
I despise your prensence.
Sickness
The Plague you spread.
Death
The love i had
Caring
The things unsaid
Loving
Never to be done again
You
A Thing i experienced.
You're lost love.
I'm sorry that things went to hell.
Because this Thing that i feel isn't burning desire anymore.
Nor is it hatred.
It's nothing, an empty pit of darkness with one ray of glancing light.
I asked someone how you're doing today.
I looked for you today to give you the mix i held onto.
So **** me?
Maybe you should think about the way you go through people.
The way you go through life
So unsatisfied.
I'm not going to have anymore idiotic "Poem Wars"
I have eyes to see.
You needed
You need
more
love
care
pain
and everything i couldn't stand to give.
My sanity is back.
I realize, i didn't Love you.
Honestly,
I just think.
Honestly,
I just liked your music and your thighs.

All i want is for you to say you don't want to leave
And I'll never go
Ill never even think about leaving again.

Body against my aching bones.
Breath I've waited so long to feel whispering down my neck sweetly.
Stuck scents
Warm lips, heavy hands.
Under nights sheets I forget everything.
I forget how badly i was breaking
I forgot how long you knew My heart ached for you
I forgot how much i knew down inside that you would take anyones love besides from mine.
I forgot
because
I need you.
Sweet lady, dripping in life
If you only knew
Through the cold nights, alone
I think of you, filling me up to the brink.
I hear your body and melt to nothing
Love!
The word so often used but never knowing fully
Dying
You don't know, nor understand.
That without you here, i can barely breathe.
After seeing your face today
dark
pale
You granted me no smile
No laughter
Even your pitiful Awes hurt.
My poems, my music
Everything sounds so stupid now.
Pointless.
Empty.
Because all i keep hearing is your voice
All i keep thinking about
Long conversations
Wrapping your arms around me every day.
I need that again.
I can wait longer.
I feel almost crazy.
Being this way.
I know what it is.
The love throbbing through me.
How dumb are you?
Still not seeing that i love you so **** much that i could cry for hours and still not get everything out.
Perfect to others, but to you.
Nothing.
Nothing but a common friend.
I fret thinking what I'm doing wrong.
What I'm not doing right.
Then sit emotionless, wondering why Someone
Someone who has never even had an inch of love for me in this world filled of billions
Someone who will possibly never feel the same for me
Someone who sees me as just.
As just another person just passing through.
I could care about
love
adore
need being there.
They say the first one hurts.
Then i think back to that night.
You still felt nothing.
I feel pathetic.
I feel stupid.
I feel so much.
I dont even know what to do, or say to you.
You act like you just want me to leave.
So hard explaining to you that i can't
so i write stupid horrible poems about love.
"Love"
What is love?
Something red?
Blue?
Love is everything
every piece
every smile
every hug
every song
Love is you.

The screams
The shrieks ripping out my mind
I want to leave you
I want to let you go, strap that unpure silken body to the ground
I want to take every kiss
Take every hug
Every faint moan, and whisper of your dark cold hands upon me
Take all things away
Keep me sane oh dear heart
Your words pour out into my soul
Filling with me sweet ecstasy
I want you to hold me
To kiss every pain away
To leave all of the worries and other past lovers
To keep your sly murdering hands at a constant
To stop killing than reviving me inside every time you gaze into my eyes
Those hazel almonds
Like a hell disguised as a heaven
They say
They speak
They lie
They hate
But i
I still stay in your arms
But I
I still kiss all of your sins away
Understanding your hurtful past
Accepting all of your flaws and faults
Oh those eyes!
Oh that touch
Fill me inside with everything you're hiding from everyone
Fill me inside with deep smoky hands
I take in all the hate
But I refuse to take in yours
I refuse for you to hurt my already parished heart
I love you
Lovey
We can try
You can
So must I
To learn how to love without all of the hate
In the end we must die
By poison and knife

Don't let that name part those sweet lips again
A perfection in a perfection is impossible
Unless it is I
How can you not see it?
Every time you speak of her perfection, I look at yours
You say cute as if a puppy following your every step
Am I only a sister to you
A foe?
I can't help but look you down and feel anxiety
I can't help but look over any flaws
For it seems I take all of your imperfection
I feel so awkward around you
Only because I feel everything about to burst
Only because I know you may not ever feel the same
Only because when you speak her name I see your face brighten
That is what kills me
Every faint sigh
Every sad conversation to which I want to kiss those words away
Wrapping around you
Bid All Sorrowful Things Away!
Not knowing what I wish
For you put me in a realm of idiocy
I want that touch of your warm hands on my burning skin
Oh! Just that sighing aching thought of loosing you
If only you knew
I want to lock you away in my heart
To tell you dreams are only dreams
To lie to you and say I am fine
Kills me even more
My old soul and dying heart
Being left for dead from the sound of your voice
Please!Just whisper the word fair mind
For thy lady cannot know.
Her beauty to fragile
Her heart to kind to even spare me but a mere couple words
To even gaze into my eyes
For she pumps my blood
She fills my steaming ecstasy
Don't smile with my thoughts running a muck
Don't sound so happy when you are speaking her name
That sound is poison to me
Dripping with every syllable into my chest
Let's just run away
You have already taken my soul
Take my lonely body with you
Why must being so young hurt so bad?
But feel so good?
Remembering the dreams of peace
And love
And rock and roll
And of me getting you for once
naked in a field of flowers
Wait? You say
For you to stop loving this?
For me to get your broken heart after leaving her?
What is cute?
Constant thoughts about how it will never be
Your awes every time I say a word sounds so pathetic
So sarcastic into another way of saying you don't care
Just stop the nonsense and keep calling my name
I want to hear perfection
Like I think of you
I want to get hugs like you give everyone else
I want to feel your touch
I want to call you mine
And show how much I love you in front of the world
In front of your cruel relative blood
What is this?
I have not any words to tell you in person
For fulling knowing it is i ?
Or it is you, lady, the one I love dearly
I don't want to loose this friendship as I lost my heart to you
So just say my name
**** me over and over
The thing you are so good at doing
Keep on introducing me to other lovers of yours
Keep burning me with those sad words
Bury me
Bury me in my own blood
In the blood of your perfection
For I am cursed to never grasp love
And always grasp friendship

I want your warmth to fill me up to the brink of extinction
your heavy breathing down my neck
Bare chest heaving, in spirals of dreams I used to call fantasies
I want what I'm cursed to never grasp
Keep talking while I sink into my nightmares
Of never holding you
Never seeing that perfection you behold again
Just one more
Don't stop until you **** me in my sleep