these journals captured
my life's lowest
when my thoughts
soared without aim--

guilt, regret,
my mind found no rest
as i knew it was i
and none other to blame

i bid farewell,
never again to be seen
be it known
did i against will

but every second
and in between
i long for him
and treasure him still

behold
these thoughts uncensored
i've the need
to set this burden free

i will not cease,
despite how absurd,
wishing
he'd come back to me