I've got a tingling all over me
The kind that makes you howl
And I think I'm losing it babe

I'll throw my clothes off
Just to scratch at this itch
After all, everything's better in *******

I'll dazedly watch my skin blush
Shy at the attention it's getting
From the fingers being raked across it

My freckles won't be the only geometric thing then
I'll have parallel and perpendicular lines
****** squares and rectangles

You wouldn't believe the roaring that fills my mind then
When I see that miasma of pinks and reds
Telling me that I don't deserve anything

Especially not you

I only pray for certain things
And most of them involve you

I pray that my dad won't read my texts
Because he wouldn't understand you and I

I pray that my dad won't read between the lines
Because then I'd be banned from talking to you

I pray that no harm will come to you
Because I'd be lost without you at my side

I pray that we'll be left alone
Because I'm scared of people interfering

I pray that I'll never make you upset
Because I can't stand the thought of it

But I don't even know what I pray to
Because the cosmos have given up on me

I didn't always like you
Romantically, I mean

But one day I noticed you
I mean, really and truly noticed you

The way you smiled
The way you laughed

The way you spoke
The way you listened

And I found myself standing there
With butterflies in my stomach and heart

But I was frightened and ashamed of the way I felt
I thought it was unrealistic to hope for anything to happen

So I tucked them away
Under "Feelings that won't ever come to light"

And I contented myself with being your friend
Because I didn't want to lose you

I was happy
For a while, anyway

Every so often those feelings would surface
And I'd sort of vaguely distance myself for a bit

Once they were under control again,
I'd act as if nothing had happened and go back to "normal."

But eventually those feelings started clawing at me
Tearing me apart and stressing me to my breaking point

So I wrote about those feelings
Calling you my "close friend"

But then I wrote about them again
Calling you my "somebody who I like"

And you noticed the second time and I
I felt my stomach twist

I worried that you would be disgusted
Having your friend turn out to have romantic feelings for you

So I went with the other person I "liked"
Who I ended up feeling platonic about (and so did she)

But then I wrote again, with you nagging at my mind
About letting anyone tell me that they liked me

And you replied and,
And I've never been happier.

I feel you wrap your arms around me in the night
And pull me into your intoxicating world

Where silence is golden
But so are the sounds that slip past our lips

We float high above the world
As if we are clouds, as if we are kings

I always hold onto you tight
Making sure that you're real

In return you embrace me with all that you are
And the air leaves my lungs with a happy sigh

I know then that you're not a dream
That your world is as sweet and beautiful as it seems

And in that one blissful moment,
You and I are only the things that exist

I hate my memory
When it notices the date is a six,
Because that's the day we built a love out of sticks.

I hate my hair
When it's long enough to flutter down to my chest,
Because that's when you thought it looked the best.

I hate my songs
When one that I edited the lyrics of plays,
Because it reminds me of those happy days.

I hate my words
When they remind me of yours,
Because they can make a person crawl on all fours.

I hate my mood
When it reminds me of how I felt dealing with you,
Because my face is red with rage but I feel so blue.

But before I say adieu,
I have one final hate for you.

I hate my poems
When they're written about you, Miss Meghan Green,
Because they're so obscene.

Test, test.
Do you know what's really inside my chest?

Beep, beep.
The horrors in my ribcage will make you weep.

Thump, thump.
Inside there isn't a single fleshy lump.

Tut, tut.
Now it's time to tell you what.

Tick, tock.
My heart is nothing more than a clock.

Ring, ring.
My lungs are made out of fraying string.

Bam, bam.
Asthma's left me with half of a diaphragm.

Crying, crying.
Now you know that I'm dying.

Sigh, sigh.
I'm afraid it's time to say goodbye.

When I listen to the radio,
I don't find any particular songs that remind me of you.

It happened with all of the others,
But not with you.

When we first started dating,
I didn't mark down the approximate time in my head.

It happened with all of the others,
But not with you.

When I first realized my feelings for you,
I didn't firmly believe you'd ever like me back.

It happened with all of the others,
But not with you.

However,
All of the songs on the radio remind me of you.
I didn't mark down the time because I was too giddy over it all.
I didn't firmly believe you'd like me because I was insecure.

It happened with none of the others,
But it did with you.