I've taken the beatings
and felt the blows
the one-two
the fester of *******
seeping into my worry

I've placed my ear
to the walls
and heard the screams
taking their shapes
the strange cacophony
of hollow voices
creeping just beyond reach

beneath these bruises
in the empty that owns the pain
and poisons expectation
where each new smile
is less brave than before
mining troubles
like flags waiting to be found

promises
summon back their quotations
ripe with a vagueness
to blacken out the deal
and erase its history
or simply wait long enough
to one day be forgotten

to cut out my tongue
so I can't talk back
to look me in the eyes
and tell me I can't see

half-hearted sentiments sting the unwritten prose
bleeding through splayed fingers
and washing regret over a crimson doubt
repeatedly planted through pockets of history
upending a future perfected in a lifeless state

the primal instinct to cast blame
to point the finger back at the older self
reprimanding the absence of wisdom
too afraid to acknowledge where confidence
could have compromised kinetic fear

advancing the loaded uncertainty
baptized in the wake of youth
and slipping into adulthood
where fear unmasks its wonder
pressure breaks the safety of character

searching through peripheral vision
to a glory fueled by blinded ambition
the right call birthed out of the sense of where
the old identity excused from the frustration
lurking in the crevices of the now

there were scriptures inside your hands
turning pages into history
I was the last thought
hoping to linger in your vision

shrouded in silence
vacant windows in daily rush
where empty train seats
wait for your arrival

there are words I can’t speak
learning the language of you
nameless as you may be
I’m stung by your potential

this searching for focus
as time suffocates my expectations
for I want to know you
past the limits of passing by

I want these walls to become weightless
this anxiety to lose meaning
for this fantasy existing inside me
to show it can come to life
to finally take its first breath

glimpses of some other life
enter the peripheral
planting thoughts behind closed eyes
waiting for uncertainty to inspire
and awaken old habits
losing focus of where the sting left
scars forgetting their pain
hands resurrecting their purpose

stories elevated by absolutes
where characters throw themselves into embarrassment
and those listening can’t contain their laughter
anymore than their alcohol or party-related energy

there’s wisdom hidden in the language
shouted for the sake of amusement
letting the music live on as the night’s compass
or liven the camaraderie ever so slightly

sticky hands finding their canned beer
after swatting the uninvited mosquitos
interrupting any chance at flirtation
lips cut their words hoping for an exchange

the pauses, the nervous ticks
insecurity slowly admitting defeat
crushing hands after crushing beers
these people interpret their own destinies
leaving the night’s heat to worry about itself

streets close off
telling work to go home
its role is finished today

white dresses dance in circles
filtered through formal lenses
where naked eyes lose their focus

lips and words fail to meet
and conjure up some magic
breathing in old silence

unmasking beautiful faces
to deliver melancholic confessions
where truths and dreams go their own ways

in the lack of an answer
or waiting for the perfunctory reply
it’s easier to lower ambition

when the chance ceases to exist
when language fit for a letter
is lost in the passage of time

in leaving the thought behind
the almost gasping for air
loneliness proves its burden
the heavy that wants to be comfortable

conversations lift from unnamed tongues
flirting with a language you don’t speak
the striving certainty, the swift confidence
unable to relate to hands finding themselves
in the corners of empty pockets
contemplating the why’s and the how come’s

distilling this patience which has remained
a novel idea lost in its own defeat
through the parameter of this potential
you’re convinced lives inside you
wishing to relate to a God who only loves
and can carry someone else’s burden

you’ve found truths to distinguish
where opportunity ends and regret begins
longing to reach this distance
of comfortable laughs and romantic gestures
existing in exchanges of foreign camaraderie
a language that cannot easily be taught