Dear God,
Do I really belong
in this world?

And if so,
Heavenly Father,
Please help me hang on.

You've put me through hell, it's true,
and nobody understands you
...but I do.
   I do, I do...

If you call me, I'll come,
and if you beg for me, I'll run.

We'll owe no one a thing.
Just us two.
Just us two.

Say my name, Babyboy,
My God I have missed you!
I've patted your side of the bed,
expecting to feel you.

Where are you, my Love?
Where the **** are you?
If I build our Cardboard Box,
Will I finally find you?

I'll lay blankets on the floor,
tape paper flowers to the walls,
Fluff your pillow like you like:
Baby, I am wailing your name!

I'll take you to heaven and back,
then sing softly to your neck--
Kiss you so sweet, taste your tears
Till warm sleep wraps you in her arms.

Do you remember me now?
Do you remember me Boy?
That's how it always used to be.
My adoration speared the sky.

So if you call for me, I'll come,
and if you beg for me, I'll run.

Come now, take a bath.
I'll wash your hair & clean your skin,
and I will dry your body off with kisses
when you're done.

Just loved to feel and taste you.
Stronger than a memory,
You're me--
No matter where and what you are,
a part of you is me.

And if you call for me, I'll come.
Baby beg for me, I'll run.

I'll always love you, Jason John.

Symmetry means not-at-all
When the beauty is fading.
Skin-deep, threadbare, sketch-thin,
******* that body you were made in!

If I put a bullet in your head,
You will go like all the rest.
Blackened rot and seep-stank bloat--
now baby: Who's the Best?

Can you, for real?
--forget amazing?
Are you settling
Way Down?
Dumb ***** talks ****
Through pretty lips
So, what. You play along?

I really thought I knew ya,
But now I'm glad I don't.
True Brilliance needs
To dump Her Trash
To keep Her Life afloat.

Farewell to you.
You're pretty, Boy,
and you've got swag and flair.
But that won't matter
When you die alone, unloved,
and scared.

Violence over silence
If you'd hit me, I'd known you feel

Your ability to erase me is
What's sealed this ugly deal

I wish I could forget you
But I'm not a sociopath

So is it wrong I'd love to **** you
and take pleasure in your death?

There is a thin line, and
I've stayed on the Godly side.
Right hip, right ear, lean heavenly
Just to hear your side.

My God! I crazy loved you.
Turned upside down, I wasn't                
  scared.
If you were close, your heat by me,
I never ******* cared.

Even as you brought me down,
I gave my all--so readily.
We watched our lives burn down
  around--
Who cares? You were my Clyde,
  baby!

I gave you all--and now, what?
And now you give me black?
I blinked several burn-**** times
Then realized you weren't coming back.

So now, I'm still here, on that line,
But now I'm leaning leftward-side.
Hungry, dark eyes are focused wide
and I'd love just to watch you die.

I hope you're terrified.
I hope you're terrified.
My ******* God-Felt dying wish
Is that you're *******  terrified.

I've coiled a golden snake
Round the base of my ring finger.
It takes up all the space
Where your promise used to be.

Its tail points toward my heart,
And its head is arching outward.
My hope is that someday,
You will slither free from me.