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J Hawkins Aug 2010
Torn apart by war, re-united by Death

Here I am again, in the deserts of the Middle East,
Thrown back into the hell, the belly of the beast,
I clutch my rifle tight, not wanting to let go,
For if I am not quick enough, I'll fall unto my foe

As I look around I see, so many brave, so many free,
And I wonder, 'Why can't that be me?',
But soon I'll be back home, and everything will be alright,
For now I sit and wonder, whether this will be my last night,

An explosion shatters the dream I'm in, and I'm back to real life,
I'm back to old Iraq and a country filled with strife,
The war goes on and I do not fall, unto the dreadful foe,
The man behind the mask, up on that plateau,

The hot lead hits me, it's fired from high above,
I see white, and am there again, in  the arms of my love,
The battle is lost, I know that I am barely alive,
I realise that I have failed to survive,

For once in Heaven I am sure, that my love there I will see,
Once she dies and comes upstairs, re-united we will be,
We will dance around the rosemary bush, just like the days of old,
I hear the choppers fly away, and I'm left to die alone.
1.1k · Jul 2011
Far Away, For Far Too Long
J Hawkins Jul 2011
If I told you that I loved you, how would you feel?
Our friendship, I hope - is carved in solid steel.
If I were there with you right now, your tears I would dry,
Sweep you off your feet, and hold you while you cry.

Some of the times we've spoken, you've been at death's door,
Knocking on forever, nobody answers you any more.
For I will save you from despair my love, I'm always here for you,
I'll smash straight through obstacles, swim the ocean blue.

I speak to you almost every day, but babe it's just not the same,
I want to be right there with you, sharing your last name.
I tend to doubt myself from time to time, saying that I'm not good enough,
Not good enough to be your lover, not good enough, for you.

I know that I may never match up to those, who are close to you,
But I'll stand here until I die, waiting in the queue.
Maybe you would eventually, come to me at last,
Be with me forever, forgetting those of the past.

That would complete my life, feeling your lips close on mine,
True love displayed with raw passion, as our bodies intertwine.
I would then give to you my very soul, in love, long overdue,
The morning after, I awake, your voice says: “I love you.”
981 · Aug 2010
Hitler's on the rise
J Hawkins Aug 2010
It's 1939 and ******'s on the rise,
He's invaded Poland and fancies another prize,
In the way is Churchill, and the Armies of the Allies,
He marches straight through Europe, while they plan his demise,

Each night the siren sounds and our curtains are all closed,
Although we are concealed, I've never felt so exposed,
I live in this war-torn land, where bombs fall from the sky,
When they fall on the houses, I hear the children cry,

When the bombs have fallen, and the hell is over,
I watch the Luftwaffe fly away, over the white cliffs of Dover,
They come each night and I feel their deadly wrath,
What if I my house is on their next bombing path,

Every time I see them coming, I run and I do hide,
But one night I do not make it, and for my children I do cry,
For a bomb has fallen on my house, and taken away my life,
That bomb it took away all that I cherish and left me filled with strife,

I have now decided to join and fight, for all that I have lost,
I have chosen to take up arms, and fight no matter what the cost,
Now I am overseas, fighting finally for a cause which is my own,
All of the death and blood around me, chills me to the bone,

I survive, day in, day out, all night long for months on end,
I do not have long left to live, I will soon be god's friend,
As the battlefield quietens down and all my friends are dead,
I realise that I'm in hell, and never shall return.
J Hawkins Nov 2011
Just one dance, that's all it took, to change my thoughts of you,
Wondering if there could ever be an 'us', as I clung to you like glue.
Staring into those perfect eyes of yours, I found your soul and heart,
It beat steadily as we danced, perhaps it was love from the start,

And suddenly something clicked, like a light had just turned on,
My heart began to love again, a love I thought had gone.
Perhaps that love never left, perhaps it was always there,
Just lying in wait in the shadows, for when I had a moment to spare.

Now I have many moments to spare, and those are spent thinking of what could be,
Is it really possible, or am I just dreaming, to think of and you and me?
What if I'm not? What if it happens? What would I do then?
Kiss you and tell you “I love you”, over and over again.

But that's all a dream right now, what's real is those few minutes, when we danced the night away.
Maybe you will see this poem, months from now and ask me “Why didn't you say?”
I'll answer that now and save you the trouble, “Babe, I didn't know how...”
“I wanted to know before!” You'd say, tears streaming down your face. “I'm telling you here and now.”

Perhaps then you'd wrap your arms around me, pull me close and share a kiss,
Then our feelings sealed, we'd stay there and stare at each other, lost in heavenly bliss.
Walking through the corridors, our hands are interlocked, and you're not leaving my side,
Kiss me on the lips, your tongue running a racecourse, in a passion which only you can provide.

And in this perfect Utopia, I'd spend each second of each day with you,
Never leaving you, not for a moment, experiencing this feeling that's new.
I could sit there for hours and listen to your voice, like songbirds all in a throng,
You'd reach for your guitar, sit on my lap and I'd ask you: “Sing me song.”

And so you'd belt out one of my favourites and I'd smile as you sang,
You'd smile back and keep on singin', off your every word, I'd hang.
And then when you were finished you'd kiss me, warming my heart right through,
Laying beside me in the sand, you look into my eyes and say: “I love you.”

And with that you'd close your eyes and fall asleep, and I'd whisper: “I love you too.”
887 · Aug 2010
Together my Love
J Hawkins Aug 2010
This poem I write for the love of my life, who is so far away,
I speak to you on MSN, but you are still not quite so real,
I write this one for you my love, I think of you every day,
If you were to speak to me, my love I could not conceal,

And yet still we speak every night, how I wish I could see your face,
I wish that I could hold you tight, and never let you go,
I wish for a miracle to happen, and that I am there lost in your embrace,
I wish that I could see you, whether in Paris or Bordeaux,

But still you are so far away, to far for me to reach,
I pray that you and I will be reunited someday,
Whether I am on a mountain, or lying on a sandy beach,
For us to be together my love, for that I always pray.
812 · Nov 2011
Your Beloved, Jack
J Hawkins Nov 2011
Another day in this hell, in the desert of old Iraq,
Another day without knowing, whether I'll come back.
As the day wears on, my mind wanders to you,
I trace your name on my arm, inked in this tattoo.

I haven't heard from you in a few days, and I wonder if you're alright,
Thoughts of you are the things, that keep me up all night.
The fire rages overhead, and I sleep straight through it all,
For I promised you to stay alive, promised never to fall.

But that being said, it can sometimes get pretty rough,
The bombs and bullets like battering rams, make life pretty tough.
Despite those moments of hellish battle, I am confident that I,
Shall never come home in a wooden box, that I shall never die.

My enemy does not care, they're like the Pharaohs of the sand,
But we're ordered to fight on, until we finally shake their hand.
Peace is not their objective, they just want us out,
After all it is their country, there's something to think about.

I'm off now darling, I've got to go and do my fair share,
My mates are dying and left to rot, in the sand out there.
I'm sorry for having left you, at such an early hour,
But now my life is in the hands, of a greater power.

Pray for me while I fight, make sure of that my dear,
Pray for me to be there, for me to hold you near.
For as long as I am with you, I'll keep on coming back,
I love you and I'll see you soon. Your beloved, Jack.
794 · Aug 2010
A dead hero from the Corps
J Hawkins Aug 2010
A dead hero from the Corps

War is raging far away, that we all can see,
For someone threatens our right to live as happy as can be,
But now my brother has left, off to war he went,
With other lads like himself, from this town of Kent,

The military come to me, as his next of kin,
I look out of the window, as the black sedan pulls in,
The officer and Padre both serving in his corps,
Walk solemnly with heads bowed, up to my front door,

Through the frosted glass upon the door, I see this Royal Marine,
In his hands he holds the flag, and a letter from the Queen,
He stares me down and in his eyes, I can see the pain he feels,
I know he too has lost a brother, with whom he shared his meals,

At the funeral of my brother, many eulogies are read,
Some are sad, others are happy, all commemorate the dead,
And my brother is remembered for the service that he gave,
As the flag-covered coffin is lowered slowly into the grave,

I think back to that day, as the rain began to pour,
To that Marine and Padre who came knocking at my door,
And I think of my brother in the peace he now has found,
For his spirit soars to heaven, while his body lies underground,

My brother will be remembered for many years to come,
As the man who gave his life, to preserve our freedom,
And as I remember the men, lost unto these wars,
I think of my brother, a dead hero from the corps.
742 · Aug 2010
Invaded
J Hawkins Aug 2010
Invaded

I walk toward the embassy, your stars and stripes fly high,
When you came here seven years ago, we kissed stability goodbye,
You came in with your tanks and troops, behind an aerial attack,
Your deliverance of democracy, ripped a hole in our Iraq,

Now you patrol our sandy streets and harass us everyday,
All you've done while in our homeland, is take our rights away,
You arrest so many “suspects”, playing out your little games,
Like the story, of my father and how he was found in chains,

His blood is on your hands, leaders of the West,
He never even raised his voice to you, or spoke a word of protest
We plead with you and beg you to leave us and yet you stay,
Waiting, in the shadows to pounce on us like prey,

Ever since your troops arrived, they've caused nothing but trouble,
With your tanks and troops, you've turned our homes to rubble,
I see the gate in front of me, and have no doubt,
This I must do, this to drive you out.
Note: I couldn't have made this work with out the help of my father.
723 · Mar 2011
Falling Apart
J Hawkins Mar 2011
Falling Apart

I feel as though I've been run over, again and again,
I'm falling apart, with nothing to hold me together.
You've moved on to someone else, I'm left with nothing,
Nothing to keep me going, no one to give me hope.

The truth is that I loved you, or at least I thought so,
But when someone beat me to you, I was left crushed.
It's not just you either, I'm losing people left, right and centre,
I'm mentioning no names because it hurts too much to tell.

But nothing hurts like this, there is no feeling like this,
The feelings that I had for you, now gone in an instant.
You found somebody else to love you, I was not enough,
You moved on and so must I, but I this I want you to know.

I still love you, I'm sorry.
690 · Jun 2011
I am just a Soldier.
J Hawkins Jun 2011
Please don't forget me darling, I'm so far away from you,
I'm here in the desert, fighting for what I feel is right,
No matter where I am, no matter how far apart we are,
You haunt me in these nightmares, that pollute my mind at night.

So as I stand here, on the edge of an abyss,
I wait to hear your voice, it frees me from this hell that I... am living in.
And although, you cannot hear me cry, I weep for you,
I cry these tears of sorrow, for the love that I have lost,

I feel as though you've left me, and that I'm all alone,
Deserted and lonely, in this Godforsaken country,
As the fighting rages on, I cover my head and cry,
Wishing that I could be, in your arms tonight.

The battle rages on, bullets flying all around, the **** has really hit the fan,
And we're all going down... at last I find the courage, to peek out from the hole.
What I see, paralyses me with fear, I'm the last one left. This is the end.
I gather up my gun and ask the Lord for forgiveness, for the sins I have committed.
I'm sorry for having killed thee, or for causing thee offence.
I was just doing my job, for the country that I love.

I am just a soldier.
Who would do it all again.
612 · Oct 2010
On this Day of Remembrance
J Hawkins Oct 2010
On this Day of Remembrance

I thank you brave soldier, for dying for me,
On this day of remembrance I light candles for thee.
I'll never be able to thank you enough,
For standing and fighting, when the going got tough.

I thank you brave soldier, by my actions today,
As I remember the men, who died in that bay.
As I stand in this field, midst a sea of crosses,
These symbols of death, remind me of losses.

Was the huge loss of life, a price too high?
For the freedom of our nation, many did die.
I could not imagine, the hell you went through,
The bombs and the bullets, the hope you clung to.

A hope that when it was over, you'd still be alive,
A hope that one day, you'd be twenty-five.
Being just seventeen, didn't make you immune,
A travesty it is, that you were taken so soon.

Your memory is never forgotten, it stands the test of time,
The memory of you as you were in your prime.
November the 11th, 1918, rest in peace, my friend.
567 · Dec 2010
Just One Dance
J Hawkins Dec 2010
If I asked you for one dance, what would you say?
Would you say “yes”?, and through the night we'd sway.
Or would you say “no”? and leave my heart in tatters,
Just say no and walk away, as my world shatters.

Perhaps I might hang up that phone, crying in the booth,
Maybe you would call me back, afraid to tell the truth.
Suppose that you did not say “no” and we danced through the night,
How would you feel, with someone to finally hold you tight?

And what if, when we'd danced, I told you that I loved you,
How would you react?, would you tell me “I love you too”?
What if that was not the case however, would you break it to me gently?
Or would you say “I'm sorry”, and say that you felt differently?

When you leave me standing there, you confirm my worst fears,
That I might be alone for life, and forever choking back the tears.

— The End —