I want to sleep, but I can't.
I've always been told that life is short and that we use a third of it sleeping,
so I make mine longer,

I go days,
hallucinating,
wondering whether or not that hand waving from around the corner was real,
my brother's like to play games,

I hear screams sometimes,
they sound terrible,
suffering that I've never imagined before enters me and my mind,

only after a few days does the suffering come,
only after a few days does it tears me apart,
it's instant,
euphoria floats over me,

I can feel it preparing,
gotta stop it,
can't let a second go to waste,


I sit and twiddle with my fingers,
breath faster,
I try to stay aleart until my next wind,

raaaaaaawrg,
yelling helps sometimes,
not always though,

I didn't have to close my eyes,
it started happening while I was alert,
I didn't even realize it,

the worlds mesh together sometimes with no warning,

jolts go through me,
I can't remember what I was doing,
am I driving?

it's hard,
I can't keep my thoughts focused,
everything wanders,
time slows,

this is the good part,
I start to see the intent that everything has,
I believe I can see into the future,
I see the mistakes I'll make,

It's a game sometimes,
Lets see how long I can go,
my body tires after the first few days,
I keep going,
sometimes weeks pass,

I never remember what's going on,
my speech is rushed,
I twitch,
keep going,
eventually sleep takes over,
it always does.

a message is sent
starting from my fingertips its
converted into an electrical signal
that travels up my arm, through
the network of nerves and receptors
the feeling goes up my shoulder, and around my neck
my brain decodes the message nearly the instant my
fingers send it,
another message is sent, this time from my brain
to my whole body
that instant my body warms up
starts to tickle
starts to tingle
starts to tense
i enjoy the feeling

5:01
I've seen it many times.

Once was while running,
over fences,
through yards,
across lots,
I had to be faster,
I was,

Once while I layed there,
my arm was around her,
we shared the warmth,
my lips pressed against her forehead,
my eyes closed,
she pulled me closer,

Once while driving,
my body numb,
I felt invulnerable,
I knew I was,
I survived,

I've noticed it again,
at this moment,
sometimes nothing happens.