I arrived at the church at 5:30.
It took me a bit to find the place

  there were only a couple half-inflated baloons
  to mark the occasion.
  Those, and a small sign with an arrow, which led
  
      down some stairs and into a cafeteria.  An
      older lady greeted me.  She had a calm smile
      on her face.  The kind that comes with age, that
      says that you've been there, done that.

"Are you here to give?"

           Of course.  Why else would I be here?

  "Yeah"

She leads me to a table that has a number of tall dividers
set up on it to prevent people from peeking at someone
else's personal life.  Like I care if you've had syphilis in
the last year...well I might if it weren't all men in here.

I start filling out the form.
No, I don't have an STD
No, I haven't spent a time totaling more than 5 years in the UK before 1996
No, I don't use drugs
No, I haven't had a fever in the last 24 hours
No
  No
    No
  No
No

I do admit that I have been out of the country recently.

I hand my sheet to another lady.  "Where did you travel to?"

    "Japan, mostly Tokyo and a few places just outside"

    "Carol, could you check Japan on the list?"

She turns to me.  "I'm almost certain that's OK, but I have to check".  Another contented smile.

I sit down to be interviewed, we go over the questions once more.

    "Alright, I just need a small sample before we begin"

She takes the sample with a small contraption that
fits over my finger and jabs a small hole.  She runs
a quick test with the blood, letting a droplet fall
in a test tube filled with a blue liquid.  

The droplet sinks to the bottom.  She checks a box.

Apparently we're good to go.

  I'm given an empty blood bag and a number of rubber-banded vials
and pointed towards a circle of beds in the middle of the room.

I walk up and a portly gentleman takes my bag and asks me
which arm I'd like it in.

"Right"

I pause.  

I want to be able to check my phone while I'm doing this.

"Actually, let's do left"

He gives a grin.  "Here, hold both your arms out"

I comply.  I immediately notice that my right arm
has a very accessible vein.  We're doing the right arm.

Oh well.

   "Let's go with the Right"

I smile and sit on the plastic seat

He swabs my arm with that wonderful orange/yellow dye
and gives me a stress-ball to squeeze, to help the process go
quicker.  He comes back with the needle.

I look away as I feel the uncomfortable breach of my skin.
It's a small pinch followed by a dull sensation, my body
telling me "That isn't supposed to be there, get it out".

         I hate needles.

I feel a light sweat break and my breathing quickens
ever so slightly.  It's ok because the hard part is over
I squeeze the stress ball every few seconds and I chat
with the man.

His name is Nick, and he's been doing this for a few years.  
He used to work in a restaurant, and then he worked for a
flooring company.  
He remarks
    on the fake grouting that the floor in this room has.  

You  can tell that he loves his job, that he's satisfied with life.

He comments on the t-shirt that I will receive for doing this

(because who would do it if they didn't get a t-shirt, right?)

He says it looks like a blueberry snowcone and tells me a
rather entertaining story from his youth about blueberry
snowcones.  

I pipe in with my memories of the Tropical Sno  shop we had
when I was a kid.  

The bag is filled, the needle is removed.  A bandaid is placed,
and then my arm is wrapped with a smily-face bandage.

I give him a left-hand shake and go sit at the refreshments table

I drink a Pepsi.  I hate trail mix.

After about 10min or so, I get in my car and drive home.
I put on the blueberry snow-cone colored t-shirt and sit
down to read a book.  I think about the people working
at the blood drive, and I think about how happy they
seemed.

I wonder to myself what the difference is between someone
who gives blood and someone who gives time.  I have friends
that travel the world for the Peace Corps, living in third world
countries with no running water, no niceties.  I think of friends
who could sit in blistering heat, helping to build a house for
someone they don't even know.  I think of myself, who thinks
that donating money to the Leukemia foundation and donating
blood to the Red Cross is somehow equivalent to donating sweat
and an able body.

I should really do more
maybe then I'll earn that smile
that those folks wear so proudly

Your smile made my heart melt
So inconsiderate
For you knew just how I felt
then made a mess of it

Your laugh made my tongue tie up
It was awfully rude
I have all these things to say, my love
and there's nothing I can do

Your beauty made my eyes light up
It is so horribly unfair
I see the wonder hidden inside
your long, entrancing stare

Everything you do, and moreso everything you say
Causes my senses and my body to act in the strangest ways
It's quite alright, I really don't mind, you make it feel like home
I'd rather be crazy for you, than sane and all alone

A Fever.

The kind that consumes you completely
and totally.  The kind that taunts you by
playing with physics.  

You're so hot, yet as you throw off the covers...you shiver
You've been sweating for hours...yet your mouth is barren of moisture

You lie as still as possible.  All movement equals pain.
Don't roll over
Don't scratch that itch
Don't even think about it
Curl into a ball and
Embrace the stillness

You're delerious as you flit
between wakefulness and sleep
never quite sure where you are
at any given time

Your dreams are drawn in the style of Dali
Colors everywhere, bright and vivid.  
The beauty makes you want to cry
To scream at the heavens,
Yell until your voice gives out.
Why?  Why are we forced to live
in such a bleak and dreary world
when such beauty lies
just beyond our eyelids.

The heavens answer.

You wake up in agony.  Your head is
Spinning
Thumping
Pounding so hard that your eyesight vibrates

For a brief moment, everything makes sense
Everything in the universe comes together
into a brilliant cosmic speck of enlightenment

It's wonderful and terrible.  
It's beautiful and disgusting
Your mind is reeling
The comprehension is too much

You love the pain
The pain is freedom

As it envelopes you,
the realization hits you
that you won't remember

You scramble to write it down
As much as you can before the
dullness replaces the fire

It won't matter

You'll read the words that you've
written on the paper much like
an archaeologist reads ancient
heiroglyphics.

Knowing, but not understanding.

Pain wins, you lose.  Unconsciousness

Then you wake up,
still dizzy from the fever.

You
Look around your room
and wonder why you
Feel

Empty

1.  If you aren't moving your hands while telling a story, it's a boring ******* story.  Add in something to make it exciting, like a chance encounter with a tiger.  So what if no one believes that tigers walk down 5th avenue, at least your story doesn't **** any more.  You know whose story ***** now?  That ******* who doesn't believe a tiger can make it in the big city.

2.  Make bad mistakes every once in awhile.  How will you know that you don't want to be part of a Colombian Drug Cartel unless you try it out for a few weeks?  Who knows, maybe you'll find out it's your true calling.  Maybe you'll stage a coup, take over the whole thing and get the hot girl in the red dress.  But no, you're sitting at your computer reading this.  My point is, drugs are bad ok?

3.  Don't be that guy who thinks he's better than everyone else because he always "does the right thing".  You know why he's never made a mistake?  Because he doesn't have a real life.  His life is as real as a Ken Doll's unmentionables.  Yeah it's all smooth and shiny, but he can't have any fun with it.  What's the point of  having a life that can't be potentially ruined by terrible decisions?

4.  Take chances.  and I don't mean by putting "Piccolo Pete's Face Burning Tabasco" on your hotdog.  I mean walk up to the next girl you see and give her a passionate kiss the likes of which she hasn't had since 3 days ago when she drunkenly made out with some random dude at a bar.  Yeah, you may feel like you've just been kneed in the groin and/or maced multiple times in the eye...but you know what?  You just made out with a beautiful woman, and you've got a good lawyer.

5.  Don't take advice from people you don't know.  Especially some random person on the internet, those people are just shady.

Pacing back and forth, picking up her
cast off clothing

telling him it's not her fault.

It was a heat wave, she didn't
have a chance, as her clothes
dripped off her into puddles
on the carpet.

She was unprepared

An earthquake shook her, and she
fell down to the rhythm.  Once it
started, there was no going back.

She was just along for the ride

It was a tsunami of passion, she
just was caught in the rip tide
of desire, along with her inhibitions.

She couldn't escape

A volcano erupted, and ignited
something terrible from within her.  

A tornado of emotions tore through
her and left her ravaged

She was lost and alone

It wasn't her fault!

If anyone is to blame, it's those ****
Asian Butterflies, causing all these

Unnatural disasters

He's a real good kid, he keeps his head down
She's pretty and polite and fun to be around
but when they're together and ain't no one in sight
They get down like animals in the middle of the night

He's walking in the door
She's lookin' to score,
knocks him to the floor
says baby do ya want some more
yeah, do ya want some more?

There's a trip slip to the bed
dip as the fly unzip, hands rip
off shoes and dress
before too long it's a
***** hot mess
put the bed to the test
as we press
You hear him confess

I love it, love it when we do the monkey lovin'
With the nails, biting, pushin' and the shovin'
between the sheets is as hot as an oven
as we become one again and again and again and again

She wraps around his waist
and he's now lost in space
taste the sweat
don't waste a second
this place is heaven
while they do the dance
lost in a trance
their faces merge
as they're on the verge
oh they're on the Verge
yeah they're on THE VERGE
as she yells out

I love it, love it when we do the monkey lovin'
With the nails, biting, pushin' and the shovin'
between the sheets is as hot as an oven
as we become one again and again and again and again

They relax between the sheets
curling their feet
hearts catch a beat
their lips meet once more
before

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

It was a Wednesday night
in the city, in a shoddy bar
that was pretending to be
a trendy one.

I sat at a table along the
wall, trying my best to look
good while sitting on a stool,
which is a difficult task for
those who know what I'm
talking about.

I was on my third beer when
he sat down.  I'd seen him here
before.  He had dark black mess
of hair that somehow suited a
thin framed face and onyx eyes

He had a strong jaw, a quick
smile, and always seemed to
be wearing a faded bomber
jacket with the initials CMJ
sewn onto the front pocket.

He took a sip of his drink,
and took a long look at me.
"You don't look like much
of a risk taker".  He paused.
Another sip.

It took me a moment to
realize that he was waiting
for me to answer.  "Oh..uh.."
I thought about it for a second.
"I don't suppose I am.  I guess
I've always played it safe"

He casually stroked the stubble
on his face as he finished his drink.
"How's that workin' out for ya?"
"It keeps things simple"
"You smoke?"
"Nah, bad for your health"

He smiled a big smile as he
pulled out a pack and lit one
up.  He pointed over to a
group of girls 2 tables over.
"You see that brunette there?
She's been stealing glances
your way for the last hour"

I looked over, just in time to
see the girl in question quickly
turn back toward her friends,
hoping that I did and that I
did not notice her.  

"You should go talk to her"
"Nah, she's with her friends"
"What if she weren't"
"I dunno, maybe...I'd hate for her to say no"
"If you don't find out, you'll never know"
"If I don't go, she can't say no"

He looked at me, then my beer.
"Imagine that your beer is full of risk"
I looked at the amber concoction
"Now, if you take too much of it, then
you have a real chance of pain and
suffering the next morning, but you
also got a chance at the best night
of your life.
  You still drink it anyway, right?"

I glanced up
"Yeah, sure"

He finished his cigarette and put it out
in the cheap glass ash tray

"Lets say you didn't.  The thing to
remember is...If you don't take it,
someone else will"

In one fluid motion, he had swiped my
beer and poured it down his throat.  He
wiped his now sated lips with a grin.

"Come on, are you serious?"
"I'm absolutely serious.  The
question is, are you?"  

He stood up and walked up to the
pretty brunette.  Within minutes
she was laughing at his jokes and
forgetting about the man she was
thinking of minutes before

Two tables down, that man sat
in front of an empty beer glass,
realizing that the words of a
complete stranger were truer
than the ones he'd been telling
himself almost his entire life.

I needed another drink