But how am I supposed to know
what we are
if one moment we are spilling our hearts out to one another,
and the next,
we aren't even talking?

One day,
I'll be able to walk on my own two feet,
and I'll be so strong at that point
that I won't even remember
you being the reason
I couldn't get off the ground in the first place.

So be your own garden.
Bloom only when you are ready,
and when you do,
dig your roots deep into the ground,
face your beauty towards the sun,
and grow.

That’s my advice.

Because when chaos breaks out,
and you’re lost in the madness your mind has brought on,
you will have planted your roots so deep into the ground,
you will not fall.
You will have support,
and you will be okay.

And when the world tries to break you,
and tell you to give up,
you will have seen the brighter side,
because you have seen the sun before,
and you know,
behind the clouds,
it’s still there,
and you will be okay.

And when life gets hard,
and the rain won’t stop pouring,
pounding down against your fragile self,
and you feel yourself about to give in,
you will grow
because our hardest battles,
tend to make us who we are.
So things will get hard,
and the world will break you,
but you will be okay.
Always.

Don’t wait for someone to plant flowers within you.
You are on your own,
and for a time you will hate that,
but you will soon realize,
you can be your own hero//

But now it's 1 am
and the dim light of the moon
illuminates my bedroom.
The light falls right onto my eyes
and I am forced to sit and think.
Many things come to mind.
Thoughts come flooding in,
and somehow,
you manage to crawl deep into my thoughts.
"I miss you."
I tell myself,
but I know you are happy,
and I know you're fine without me.
It hurts,
but I have to manage to be okay with it.
I roll onto my right side and the light
dances off my face.
My room falls dark and lonely again.
I am left with just my thoughts.
This is my life.

I scratch out your name
that's written in the back of my mind,
but as I flip through the pages,
I find that you're all that's there.
Just your name,
our memories,
and my broken heart.
Because as I've found out,
I can rip out all the pages,
and burn all of what we had,
but your name will still be engraved
in the back of my mind,
stitched deep into my heart,
and hollowed into my soul.
I don't want to write about heartbreak anymore,
but every line comes back to you.

-k.w//I Can't Seem To Let You Go