I CANT ******* BREATHE ANYMORE

My life is not perfect,
I promise you that.
I'm angry,
confused,
and constantly sad.
Because of the things I hear everyday,
at school,
at home,
and in my own brain.
(i.s.)

you slip your hand in mine,
your thumb moving slowly against smooth skin

i lay my head on your shoulder,
and with that small movement,
i realize this is forever

i will never let you go, my love,
please never let go of me

it's 11:21
and i'm dying inside
and i still will be at 11:22
...23...24...
please no more crying
because i'm trying

just make it stop

(i.s.)

Autumn Leaves,
falling,
    drifting,
        sinking.
Letting themselves be carried by the wind.
Never bothered by the constant breeze,
making them wind,
                              swirl,
                      ­            and slowly collapse to the almost frozen ground.
(i.s.)

Laying down,
beside a toilet,
feeling never ending pain.

My eyes are drifting closed,
but I still feel the buzz,
the alcohol running through my veins.

Why does this happen every night?
I thought that I could stop,
but it's a never ending cycle,
of laying beside a toilet,
with my hair pulled back,
and my heart smashed in half.
(i.s.)

I wish you would tell me when you were sad.
We could lay under warm, fuzzy blankets
and complain about how ****** the world is.

You think I don’t understand,
how one person can hold so much distress,
but I promise I do.

I know I can never stop you from being unhappy,
but I can stop you from being alone.
(i.s.)

For you, my one and only,
I like you more and more,
the way your hand fits into mine,
and leads me to my classroom door.

For you, my one and only,
I'm falling more and more,
the coziest and tightest hugs,
I ever do adore.

For you, my one and only,
I love you more and more,
your tender, gentle kisses,
leave me wanting more.
(i.s.)

I'm sad.
There's no better way to explain it.
Darling I'm trying to fight it,
but I just can't help it.

I'm sorry I'm letting you down,
I know I promised to be happy,
But I just can't force myself to fake it anymore.
(i.s.)

fixing a shattered mirror is easier than fixing a shattered person,
trust me I've tried fixing myself,


it didn't work.

(i.s.)

Hand in hand,
Heart with heart,
Forever intertwined.

I fell in love, most suddenly,
and never left it behind.

Because if I know just one thing,
and forgotten all the rest
It is that, most definitely,
our love prevails.
(i.s.)

I feel like you did,
a bunch of years ago,
when you were still breathing.
It ***** feeling like you.
I know one day I’m going to end up how you did.
And that scares the hell out of me,
The same way it did to you.
(i.s.)