So on that night
I decided it was the night.
I just could not hold it in anymore.

As I lay in my nook
I took a deep breathe
Looked you in the eyes
and I said those three words.

You didn't flinch.
Not even a hint
from your expression.

A kiss.
Then we lay in silence
A silence I expected
But had prayed it wouldn't happen

For a brief moment  
That kiss bought with it a relief
I felt the pressure go.

Then that silence
A crushing silence
Leaving behind it a dull ache
in the pit of my stomach.

While your kiss still lingers on my lips.

I'm so angry.
Angry at the world for what it is
putting me through right now.
But more than anything,
I'm angry at you.

You are suppose to be one of
the people in my life who I
can rely on.
Who I trust.
Who I turn to.
Who I cry to.
In fact you are one of the
few people in my life who I
can do this to.

But you have a problem.
You have a problem saying no.
You freely admit yourself.
Normally only saying no hurts you.
But now its hurting me.

Me.
One of the people in your life
who you can rely on.
Who you trust.
Who you turn to.
Who you cry to.
In fact I am one of the few
people in your life who you
can do this to.

And you couldn't say no.
You hurt me.
And that's why I'm angry.

What is the point if I cant rely on you.
And that makes me sad.
More than sad.
Angry.
Angry at you.