Sleepless.
I grab the phone
And dial the number
That I used to dial everyday,
But I don't anymore.
You answer the phone,
"Hello?"
"Hi, it's me.
We haven't talked for so long, I know.
I just wanted you to hear out
What I have to say.
Don't blame me
For walking away.
I never meant to hurt you,
or myself.
I simply stopped pretending
That I was okay
When I never really am.
And,
I don't hate you.
You shouldn't hate me, either.
We never had anything
To really fight about.
No hard feelings.
I just decided
I need to do more
With my life.
Don't hate me, please,
I don't deserve to be despised.
I simply stopped pretending
That I was okay
'Cause I never really am.
...
Are you still on the line?"
An awkward silence
Followed my words,
Then you said
In a tired voice
As if you didn't recognize
Who I am
Or what I was talking about,
"Do you know
What time of the night
This is ?!"
Then you ended the call,
Abruptly,
And went back ..
.. To sleep.

Why are you like this?
You're so inhuman, senseless.
Someday you might catch a cold
From all of that ice on your soul.
Why do you like to make me feel small?
Why am I still talking to you at all?!
Are you some kind of evil phantom?
How did you hypnotize me like that?
What is it that runs through your mind?
Your thoughts are beyond my reach.
I can't decipher your face expression.
I can't read between your lines.
I can't predict you,
Or link between your different personalities with each day.
Teach me to be unbreakable.
Teach me to forget.
Teach me to be so carefree and cold-blooded.
Teach me to steal hearts!
Why should I be your unfortunate victim?
This is not just another story in my life,
This is a nagging pain I'll carry within me forever.
Just tell me..
What Are You?!

On nights like this,
I remember you.
Right after midnight,
on a full-moon night,
when I’m allowed to walk out …
Nights like these
Used to be our nights.
I limp to the oak tree
and sit down to breathe some air.
Ten years ago,
I sat under this tree,
and you were there.
Everything has changed
and you might have
Forgotten my name by now …
But I remember it as if
I was still alive yesterday.
Ten years ago,
Three in the morning
And I was wide awake
Sitting under the full moon
with you …
The oak tree above us
Was whispering slow
Like the unspoken wishes
Of the dead
Lying in their graves
In the cemetery
Spreading at the foot of the hill
On which our oak tree grows …
And you held my hand
Tightly in yours,
And you said, “I’m with you,
Forever.”

Well, here I am now
all alone
you must be sound and safe
sleeping at home.
Forever hasn’t ended yet,
so why are you gone?
I might be unable
To take care of you now
It’s out of my reach
To be by your side, again,
To make you smile …
But why don’t you visit me
Just once in a while?
I’m a wandering soul
Aims, I have none.
But the memory of you,
why hasn’t it gone?
Now the sun is rising
and the darkness disappears …
I must go back to sleep
to lie in my grave
in the cemetery
Spreading at the foot of the hill
on which our oak tree grows …
Until the next full-moon,
When I wake up
to remember you.

Silence for what seems like decades,
Endless periods of time,
In this small choking room,
With charred walls
And torn curtains,
With nothing but dust hanging in midair.
Clocks had stopped ticking,
And water doesn’t drip-drop anymore
From the never-sealed tap.
No sunshine beaming through my window,
No birds chirruping in my garden,
Only dry dead branches,
Dry baked earth,
The smell of cobwebs and rot.
Sitting in my corner for so long,
I’ve become almost as lifeless
As this place itself.