From the moment I saw you
I was in love.
Gazing deeply in your eyes
I saw your soul
so pure.
I was addicted
I could not look away.
It took but a moment
and instantaneously
my heart melted.
The frozen gates
that sheathed my soul
unthawed.
The guard that had enslaved
my life
dropped his weapon.
He withdrew
from his post
leaving me open
to new possibilities.
I knew from that very first glance
that I would eternally
be in love.

My soul unto yours
your soul unto mine
from this moment on
united through time.

Souls once divided at last reunited!

Before sunlight can shine
I hear you breathing
long and deep
a melody to my ears.

Before sunlight can shine
I smell your aroma
raw sensual bouquet
a buffet to my nose.

Before sunlight can shine
I feel you waking
slightest of movement
a masterpiece to my fingers.

Before sunlight can shine
I see your eyes open
glimmer of new day
a vision to my eyes.

Before sunlight can shine
I taste your lips
hungrily eager
an ****** to my tongue.

Before sunlight can shine
our bodies entwine
renewal of vows
a nuptial of our senses.

Your face next to mine
I have seen a million times
every curve and every hair
I can't help but to stare.

The way you hold my hand
and tell me your my man
and go the extra mile
to always make me smile.

The way you hold me tight
you make it feel so right
you kiss me long and slow
and never let me go.

Then you say my name
I look up at you in shame
trying hard not to scream
it's another **** daydream.

Deep, aching, stabbing,wretched, pain
barely walking, limping, body strain.
Exhausted, fragile, paleness
unhealthy, aging,signs of stress.
Numbing, tingling,constant, hurt
no turning back now, cannot avert.
Pushing forward inch by inch
each step I take makes me flinch.
Pills,creams,meds and all
nothing helps I just sit and bawl.
Too young to have my body break
don't know how much more that I can take.
Doctors help that's what they do
but, doctors here think I'm a fool.
Treatment costs so very much
without insurance a cure is out of touch.
So I pick myself up and do what I must
til it's ashes to ashes and dust to dust.

As the sun set my heart rose
Soaring high above the clouds
A kiss like no other
Tore down the shrouds
Of doubt

As the sun set your heart rose
Looking in each other’s eyes
A kiss like no other
Tore through the disguise
Of pain

As the sun set our heart rose
Standing in the bad weather
A kiss like no other
Joined two people together
As one

Your eyes stared right through me
I didn't want you to see.
I attracted you to me like a moth to a flame
at first it was comical just playing this game.
Then somewhere it changed up and I knew I was stuck
I felt my heart melt, couldn't be saved, I was just out of luck.
I've spent many years just doing my part
playing with people while protecting my heart.
Sure, I've said some things that should have never been said
I'm guilty of breaking hearts and ******* with many a head.
I'm not too proud of what I have done in the past
my mindset was get in get what I want and get out really fast.
I finally realized what I've done isn't cool
when you came along and left me looking like the fool.

Wind rushes through the trees sounding like a train
piles of leaves fall off the tree like a rainbow colored rain.
Red, yellow and orange colors capture my eye
it's time again for Autumn's last celebration in the sky.
I watch them dance and sway to their own beat
as one by one they gently land to my feet.
A colorful array like a circus coming into town
waving their tiny stems like hands as they fall down.
I stand there mesmerized, hypnotized by the sway
I stare for what seems like hours, I cannot look away.
The golden sun has now turned the sky to and orange and pink hue
separating the clouds to make way for the moonlight's debut.
A chill has taken over the air, the heat has ran away to places unknown
as I inhale the scents of October's crisp and clean cologne.
As I turn to go in I say goodnight to the world outside
walking into the house I feel somber as if someone has died.
Summer has passed, I hang my head and I mourn
but, the magical thing about the Season's is they will again be reborn.

Not so long ago
I lost my flow
where did it go?
I do not know.

I sat down to write
but it was a fight
no words in sight
it just wasn't right.

I asked my brain
to not be insane
to just regain
and flow once again.

I tried to force it
but I had to quit
I had lost my wit
it was all unfit.

I started to obsess
I must confess
I was in distress
my writing a mess.

Then I opened a beer
it all became clear
I had nothing to fear
it wasn't that severe.

Now at last here I am
I am like ****
I hit a grand slam
with this little jam.

Hi my name is Bob
I am afflicted with ****** cranium inversion
I don't get paid, but it is my job
plus I get a kick from the *******.

My hair as you can see
is starting to thin
my ****** hair is all but absentee
much to my chagrin.

I stay highly aroused
when my shoulders are touching my feet
and my head is housed
no other feeling can compete.

I have been told
on many occasion
that I should simply unfold
and eliminate all the abrasion.

But, I cannot help it
I fear its too late
for me to just quit
and start walking straight.

So I came to this place
in hopes that you could provide
some **** for my face
so out my **** it would slide.

I want to believe all I'm hearing from you
I'm tired of hearing things that just aren't true.
I need to feel passion and love in my life
happiness seldom reaches where pain cuts like a knife.
Left to my own imagination I have become quite jaded
too many words that would have been better left off unstated.
My mind playing tricks again I see only what I want to
overstayed my welcome my tears were the first clue.
How can I move on and love you the way you love me
when I can't stop punishing myself or stop being angry.
I am on a fast track the Devil's Highway
Nothing left now for me but, to pray.

I spent every day
giving
all my love
guess I assumed
one day I would just receive it.

I spent many years
looking
to be loved
guess I assumed
one day I would just see it.

I spent a lifetime
wishing
I felt loved
guess I assumed
one day I would just feel it.

I spent every night
asking
God for love
guess I assumed
one day he would just give it.

Tired of shaking I am losing control
too much anxiety has taken its toll
adrenaline pumping all through my veins
standing here naked body wrapped up in chains
I''m a prisoner help me let me out of this cage
theres nothing more deadly then a heart full of rage
I scream through the cell hoping someone will hear
a voice dark and low says "you have nothing to fear"
"GOD is that you?" I reply in the dark
"You know the answer" its says "look deep in your heart"
"GOD I cant see, are you really here now?"
"All in due time but first you must say this vow"
"GOD I''ll do anything just free me from this hell"
"I have you my child there''s no need to yell"
" What must I do GOD just tell me I''m in"
" First you must bow and let me wipe you from sin"
"Oh GOD I am sorry I was wrong please forgive me"
"Your prayer has been answered now just open your eyes and you''ll see"
So I opened my eyes and got such a surprise
standing before me was not GOD but SATAN with snake eyes
"Lucifer it is you i thought u were GOD
how could you do this why the facade?"
"Child not everyone who hears you is GOD dont you know
take my hand and I''ll show you the right way to go."
"I cannot do that I wont go with you
I''d rather be dead then sell my soul like a fool."
"Child you are mistaken it''s too late you''re all mine
for it wasnt you who made your life contract it was your parents who signed!"

Little Miss Muffet sat on a bench
holding her designer weave
along came a breeze
it fell to her knees
now that's a sight you have to see to beweave.

Dear Santa this year has been so hard
I can't afford a tree, presents or a card.
I haven't been the best that I probably should have been
I write this heavy hearted, I don't know where to begin.

I ask you dearest Santa to grant me these three things
and if you cannot do it please pass it to The Kings.
My husband lost his job and the car is broke down too
we have never asked for help before but, we are asking it from you.

I ask you mystic Santa to hold my family near
I want us to be close especially this time of year.
This is my first request it may be kind of rough
but, I want my kids to understand that being a family is enough.

My second wish oh Santa is for my teen princess
I want her to be strong and proud and never have to stress.
If you could give her some art supplies of her very own
I would greatly be in debt to you for the love that you have shown.

My third and final wish is for my growing boy
a few things he could build I know he would enjoy.
He doesn't always listen but, he really seems to try
I want him to be strong too and reach up for the sky.

In closing Santa, I thank you much for listening to my bids
no one should have to beg for help especially for their kids.
I am asking you Santa to do what you do
thank you in advance, and Merry Christmas to you.

I sit here singing a Birthday song to my Grandma who has passed on
and I will keep on singing til all my tears have dried and gone.
I think of you often I miss you so much
I'd give up my life right now just to once again feel your touch.
You passed on so long ago but, it hurts like it was today
I know God had other plans and you had to be on your way.
I don't know if you see me as I write this up for you
or if you can feel the pain inside as I still sit and mourn for you.
You lived a full life and I am glad I was there as much as I could be
I don't think you ever knew how much you truly meant to me.
Nobodies perfect in life we make mistakes
but I would have forgiven all of yours to see you have more Birthday cakes.
I am sorry that you suffered while you were alive
I wish there was a cure for cancer and that you had survived.
I type this to you Grandma, I want to scream your name
I want to be so selfish now and tell God he is to blame.
So Happy Birthday my dear Grandma who's been gone for 9 whole years
instead of Birthday cake and presents I gift you every single one of my tears.

T'was the day of Thanksgiving and all through the house
the women were prepping and cursing their spouse.
Outside it was cold with lots of snowflakes
the turkey was chillin all ready to bake.
The hubbie's all lazy sat fat on their ***
doing nothing but drinking beer from a glass.
They were screaming and whining about the tv
til one vile man started a game of fartsy.
The stench of bean dip now filled up the room
when all of a sudden there was a loud boom.
One idiot had said "hey let's see if this works"
then they picked up a candle like adolescent jerks.
Big Fred bent over in front of the flame
then his pants caught on fire because of his aim.
The men started squealing like wee little pigs
trying to put out the fire by dancing a jig.
"Stop, drop and roll, you absurd little twit"
all of the men dropped til the fire had quit.
The women all standing looking in awe
started laughing hysterically  at them all.
The men didn't laugh they just got off the floor
walked back to the couch to check on the score.
The women returned to the kitchen to finish
which prompted their laughter to diminish.
Now people I warn you with candles don't play
cuz nobody wants to be homeless on Thanksgiving day.

Deep fires within
stay hot to the core
I'm glowing cant you see.

Intense from your love
that brightens my world
like God's hands touching me.

Each ray from the sun
directly absorbed
my soul stays ablaze for thee.

Is it wrong of me to think about you night and day
waiting to hear from you longing to hear you say
that you are thinking about me like I'm thinking about you
knowing it's wrong but, still wanting you to.
Timing is wrong we both know this too well
but, every moment I am not near you feels like I'm living in Hell.
Maybe I shouldn't be telling you this
but, nothing would make me happier then the taste of your kiss.

I feel your touch
Softly
On my skin
Your warm fingers  
Gliding
  Over me slowly
My body responds with a chill
But I am not cold

I feel your breath
Gently
On my neck
The warm air
Gliding
Over me slowly
My body responds with a chill
But I am not cold

I feel your body
Tenderly
Up against mine
Your warm embrace
Encases me slowly
My body responds with a chill
But I am not cold

A black shadow covers me so dark and so cold
I'm searching for a reason, an answer to be told.
How did it find me, how long has it looked?
what did it taste that has it so hooked?
My smile has begun to fade, it is nearly all gone.
How did I get here, what is it I did wrong?
My heart is beating erratically to a beat I do not know
I feel my happiness fade as my anger begins to flow.
To my knees I fall, I am looking for an assist
I am screaming to God as I'm clenching my fist.
God, can you hear me, is there anyone there?
I have needed you so long, do you even hear my prayer?
I am looking for guidance, some hope, a small little sign
I sob in desperation, waiting for you love within me to shine.
I await the answer, I cry and I plead
Please won't you help me, it is you that I need.

I did it again I came in stumbling
I can't speak out so I end up mumbling.
I slammed the door so hard the pictures fell
I hate myself so much I want out of this Hell.
I can't see in the dark so I trip over the couch
I start cursing at it before I can say ouch.
I tear up whatever is in my way
I don't care if you go or if you stay.
By the time I get to the hallway the house is a mess
I don't care anymore I have enough stress.
I see you lying there in the bed alone
I come at you like a cyclone.
"Get up out of this bed, go clean this house."
as I grab you hard, tearing your blouse.
You try to get up but, I stomp off in a rage
go to the closet and grab my 12 gauge
You are crying so loud but, I don't hear a sound
until the gun let's off a single round.
I am shocked by the noise, I drop the gun in a hurry
I stumble to the bed but, my vision is still blurry.
You aren't moving, "my God what have I done?"
"What the hell made me so mad to pick up that gun?"
Standing there in tears I scream,"baby I didn't mean it."
" I drank too much, I love you, the beer made me do it."
I put my hand to your face to see if your breathing
I can't see too clearly but, I don't see you bleeding.
I reach in my pocket and pull out my phone
I call 911 and give them the address to my home.
The cops soon arrive you haven't moved at all
I let them in and stand with my back against the wall.
They tell me,"Sir come in here, we really need to talk."
I don't know how I didn't fall since I still could barely walk.
My eyes dart open and I grasp for a breath of air
I yell your name when I see you sitting there.
The cops put handcuffs on me and say I'm going to jail
"You're lucky you didn't **** her,you might get out on bail."
"Baby, I love you madly, I would never want you to die."
She looked at me in my face and said "I love the way you lie."
Now my wife has moved to a location that I am not to know
they say I'll be out of prison in a few years, I'm really hoping so.
So, I sit here everyday and think of her while in my cell
I thought my life was bad before now I really am in Hell.

My heart has stopped beating  my happiness is fleeting.  
I need you in my life right now I hang my head I begin to bow.
You are not here but yet you are, so close yet so far.
My tears run down my face all day I can see you run I see you play.
Your scent is all around me you are more then a memory.
Feels like someone has cut my heart out of my chest I try and sleep my mind never at rest.
  I watched you slowly die my eyes stung I began to cry.
I held your body against my chest I wondered if I gave my best.
I thought that it was time to let you go in peace only God could make your suffering cease.
I held your head to me so close while the needle injected its lethal dose.
In that moment i felt you leave my body consumed by unbearable grief.
Your body lie there your soul has flown  the room is full yet I am all alone.
Life goes on or so they say but most of me is with you and gone away.
Life is not about what you do it is about those you love and whom love you.
I know this pain I feel today will never end just slowly fade.
My body shakes my tears they flow I know you are with me everywhere that I go.
I'm sorry my friend for it ending like this but know it is you that I will forever miss.

"Three days?
Merely three?"
Burst of salty
shimmering tears
upon my red face;
excruciating pain
within my chest;
as I hear
those unpleasant words,
"You have three days left
in which to live."

The stars shine so bright in the sky as I sit shivering on this chilly night
I look for an answer to my prayers throughout the heaven's mysterious light.
My mind starts to wonder as I search among the stars
I begin to hear music, angelic guitars.
The clouds start swaying as if they were dancing to the sounds of the universe
the trees reaching out to heaven as if to shake hands and converse.
I feel like I am floating I am reaching towards the sky
I really want to go with them but, I haven't said good-bye.
I slowly come back to consciousness, I couldn't leave just yet
I have unfinished business I must tend to, as I awake in a cold sweat.
There's a touch, so soft and gentle on my face
I open my eyes to see I am in a strange place.
My children standing over me with tears upon their cheeks
turns out I was in the hospital, had been there several weeks.
I had tried to take my life one night they explained in utter pain
apparently I was upset so bad I literally went insane.
Guilt it is a funny thing it can eat your heart and soul
I didn't want to hurt them, just to end the suffering was my goal.
I am back at home now, I am getting better everyday
I just couldn't leave my family, so I made up my mind to stay.
Sometimes, I still stare at the sky, and imagine how it'd be
to hold and kiss my long lost ones and reunite our family tree.

My love, the time is here
for me to let you know my dear
that I see your face when I close my eyes
it happens so much to my surprise.
I don't know if I should keep them open
for without you my soul is broken.
No will to fly, no will to swim
I just sit all alone where the light is dim.
I hear you call out to me through the night
your voice echoes through me though you're nowhere in sight.
I cry out for you more with each passing day
it hasn't been the same since you passed away.
They brought me a mate, I felt so disrespected
for love doesn't end with death when your souls are connected.
Now the world has me deafened to every sound
I just float in the place where you last could be found.
Then last night I dreamed that my sorrow had passed
I woke up to find I was with you at last.

Everyday I wake up a lil more crazy then the day before
having a hard time dealing I'm about to walk out the door.
Can't deny myself no longer this pain I keep inside
put in so many years, can't say I haven't tried.
No longer feel the joys I once had when I was young
my anger flows so freely now, my weapon is my tongue.
Wake up with so much pain, I cannot feel a thing
looking for an out something only death can bring.
Been sittin on the devil's lap while he whispers n my ear,
tellin me "It's ok now, just do it, there is nothing left to fear."
In a world of all these people and alone I carry it all
I use to walk so self- assured now I stumble and I fall.
Can't go back to where I was no matter how I try
reaching out to emptiness and all the while I cry.
I never meant to hurt noone and most of all myself
but life is such a lonely place when you cannot be yourself.
Oh my god I hope you forgive me for what I'm about to do
nevermind, forget all that, for you weren't there when I needed you.

A single drop slides
From your eye
As I look at you in amazement
I am the reflection of you
I see you in me
And vice versa

You have taught me
How to stand on my own
How to hold my head high
How to always stand firm
To what I know to be right

I see you standing there
Enduring and strong
your highs and your lows
As the winds of life
Try to knock you down
Try to take your being
Try to make you fall

Yet you stand
Through the trials and tribulations
You change paths when it’s called for
But you never change who you are
You are the reflection of my soul
My teacher
My example
I am you

Noone ever told me
I was their world
Their everything
Their soul

Noone ever told me
I was beautiful
Was precious
Was wanted

Noone ever told me
I'd grow up to be someone
To be valued
To be followed

Noone ever told me
I made them proud
Made them smile
Made them live

Noone ever told me
As an adult or as a kid
That they loved me
Until I just did

Oh heart why have you forsaken me, what did I do to you
I thought I gave you everything I guess that wasn't true
You sprang ahead with so much energy of which I've never known
brought a light inside of my life something I've never been shown
You teased me with the thoughts of love and happiness galore
Let me feel the good in life and left me wanting more
Now you have become so cold beating out of tune
You let me down again, this time way too soon
I tried to tell you keep your armor on and resist
You didn't listen to me tho my words you just dismissed
Now here we sit me and my foolish heart
The moral here is don't give up and always finish what you start

Sitting with my beau
amongst the fire's glow
where he did bestow
a galanty show.

Something only you do keeps me coming back
something only you give me that in my life I lack.
Something I cannot put into words
something that doesn't go away but recurs.
Something I needed but couldn't find elsewhere
something out of the blue I couldn't prepare.
Something in the air that I must have breathed
something once hidden that only you freed.
Something so precious too rare to have a name
something from nothing to something it became.
Something keeps me thinking til I can't think no more
something I thought about but never asked for.
Something makes me laugh when I would have rather cried
something has me living when I would have rather died.
Something touched me deeper then I have ever felt before
something brightens my day so much right into my core.
Something can't be fake when it is obviously true
something isn't a thing at all, that something is just you.

Sometimes I get scared when you are not around
my mind fills with thoughts to the point I almost begin to drown.
I try to push them out of my head and just feel you in my heart
I feel so empty without you, I almost fall apart.
And just when I feel I'm about to lose it all
you walk back in my life and say those words so very small.
They fill my soul with so much light
I cant help but know I shouldn't give up the fight.
I may get quite shy at times and not know what to say
but I need you to know it's you I think of every single day.
I dont know how you do it, how you make me feel so great
all that I know is this has got to be fate.
Sometimes I get so down because I miss you so bad
then my heart fills with rage over something I thought that we had.
I picture your face in my mind, I see it so clear
then comes the hopeless feelings of jealousy and fear.
Tears begin to run down my face, one by one then a lot
til I can't even move from all the pain that it brought.
I sit and I cry and I can't figure it out
that's when I realize I love you without any doubt.
It hurts me inside because you are absentee
I keep screaming out loud, "how could you forget about me?"
When I finally pick myself up and become strong once more
something happens I just can't ignore.
You come back to me and it's like you were there all along
then I think to myself I must have been wrong.
I hope you don't get upset that I am telling you this
but there's something about us together I just can't dismiss.
I try and be patient knowing that one day it will all be ok
I just miss you so much when you are away.
You make me so happy, you make me shine bright
I feel like a princess, you are my white knight.
Maybe it scares you that I come on strong
I hope you forgive me if I am doing this wrong.
I dream of you nightly is that such a crime
I want you with me forever not just some of the time.
I say these things to you because I can't hold it inside
I don't care who knows how much I love you I have nothing to hide.
You don't mean to hurt me I can hear it in your voice
things are this way because we have no other choice.
Just close your eyes, put your hand on your heart, what do you feel?
You are within me and I within you, you know this is real.
Open up to me, let me heal you, let me take away all of your pain
you have nothing to lose but, have so very much to gain.

I'm standing in the mirror looking deep inside
seeing all the pain, all the times I wish I'd died.
Couldn't be consoled, couldn't find my way out
ready to end it all without a second doubt.
Strange how you see all that craziness in your own eyes
putting on a fake smile, telling all those lies.
Too many people took control of my very soul
led me down their path, strayed away from my goal.
Standing here still looking at that little girl
stomach ******* in knots, ready to hurl.
Death seems like the only real answer
these sickening thoughts eat through my brain like cancer.
Once I was so strong and now I am so very weak
razor to my face again as the blood drips down my cheek.
I lie on the floor blood shoots from my vein
the only time I feel relief is when I'm suffering in pain.

My heart is racing beating out of control
Never expected this, how was I to know.
Thoughts rushing around at the speed of light
Didn't want to leave, didn't want to say good night.
Already missing you in a matter of seconds
Already lonely, my heart starts to beckon
How have you touched me so deeply this fast
Breaking down every wall that protected me in the past.
My soul yearns for you,it's calling, can you hear it
There's a blazing fire inside me that you have lit.
I had given up on all chances of happiness
Every moment with you gives me nothing but bliss.
I get so excited just to know you are there
Nothing else concerns me you're my only care.
I'd give anything to touch you or just to kiss you one time
And I would surely die if you told me that you were all mine.