Delilah

Delilah Feb 2022

I have this group of girlfriends...best friends...sisters
We love with our hearts and souls
We deal with the unbearable all while holding each other
Near or far I know we have this bond
Each of us are somewhere in our life
For two I believe they are living in a defining chapters
For the other we are just living and slowly climbing the ladder
Wondering where to go next
We're still falling out the plane looking for a soft place to land
One fell hard
One fell just right
One is still trying to find the ground
and I have my eye on the ground but just don't really know how to get there
I wonder where these chapters will take us
hoping that this sisterhood ends up on solid ground

Delilah Aug 2021

Women

As I look around my apartment I see small moments of all the wonderful women in my life
I see the kitchen table given to me by my cousin who so generously gave to me with the candles and flowers that I bought to make my own
The bedroom furniture so graciously sold to me by someone whom I admired so very much
The couch I'm sitting on given to me by the professor who told me not to quit after a terrible heartache
And this very apartment crafted to make this my safe space before I even lived here by my best friend
And remembering the night I moved in with the help of my mother, aunt, and niece who saved the day with their willpower and kindness
All together the women in my life have helped to create my amazing living space and helped to make it my own and without them I don't know where I'd be

God safe the women

Delilah Feb 2021

Relapse

There you go again reaching for the drugs
to alter this form of reality we both live in
you talk to me so sweetly but when they wear off its an awkward exchange almost like we're two strangers
You're not the first person to do this in my life
I'm used to it
I've come accustom to everyone close to me needing to alter the reality for one thing or another and I'm always caught in the crossfire
And why does it still hurt all these years later
why do I still fall for the person that is high
why haven't i left them all behind
but maybe
I like the high a little more than you
maybe its the you I get high off of

Delilah Jan 2021

Grieving the Life We Were Suppose to Have

This is not a hard goodbye
but a goodbye to what we thought would happen
we thought our love would last
and that our magic would stand the test of time
it pains me with every fiber of my body
that I will not be your person/lover/wife/mother to your child
I am to be your friend because neither one of us wants to grieve it completely

The outline of our future was set and beautiful
Successful, happy, and in love
but here we sit in different home facing life's mountain that our love couldn't overcome

So my hope for us is that we grieve what we need to and hold on to what we can savage from the rubble to be just friends and maybe every now and then we can still see that magic within

savage

Delilah Jan 2021

The Future with you

I imagine the wedding day will look beautiful
You will probably be the most stunning bride
and your parents will beam with pride
your dad will made jokes as he walks you down the aisle and mom will surely cry
Your sister and brother will stand by your side
I know your aunt and uncles will be so proud
and as your dad gives you away and you look at the one that is right for you I hope you remember me
remember me not in a bad way but as someone who helped pave the way to your beautiful bride
I know I will remember you when I look at mine
I'll remember the way you loved me like no one before and the way your family made me feel
I'll think of them from time to time
but you I shall think about you more than I wish
because I know that we shared something so special but it just wasn't meant to last
we will not see each other on our special day but I hope you think of me and remember the way we pushed off of each other to find our one that will give us our special day

Delilah Nov 2020

Who is She

Who is this girl I see
Staring right back at me
I don't know her but I feel her
I feel that she is lost, a bit
She's sacred, a bit
but she is brave and will weather any storm or mood that comes
I'm curious on what she really wants but I think she doesn't know
She doesn't know what she wants
She just wants fun, laugher, and success
That's all
But life is so **** messy that it gives her so many more thoughts
maybe one day she'll know which path to take and when she ends up in the right place she'll know exactly that is it the right place for her

Delilah Nov 2020

My fierce little ladies

My darling ladies
You have been so beautiful and so loved since the moment we knew about you and I know sometimes it doesn't feel like that from some of the people who are SUPPOSED to love you but they do
And regardless if they do or don't
I love you each and everyday
I wish I could see you grow into the wise little women that you are becoming everyday but I am becoming my own wise women daily
Together we will make our own family
We will make it kind, caring, and healthy
For us and our futures
I believe that you both will become such amazing women and that you will lead life in your own ways but I know deep down you will make it beautiful and wonderful for your souls
I've fought for you since I was young because I knew that someone needed to pave the way
But you fierce little women are paving your own way to success
I know you both will deal with the same struggles that I dealt with but I know with your happy spirits and me by your side nothing will stand in your way