I'm on an everlasting roller coaster,
The turns,
The bumps,
The drops,
The speed.
Its all got my heart racing,
And my stomach turning
I want to get off.
I want to leave.
I want to close my eyes until its over,
I never want to wake up

I'm in wonderland.
Where everythings backwards,
Upside down,
Its beautiful.
But I cannot see.
I can't see what's going on,
Through my blurry vision,
I see an oncoming object.
A rabbit.
But he's no friendly rabbit like I'd thought
He approaches me,
With a knife in his hand.
And stabs me in the back
Until my mind and heart can't take it any longer.

I'm on a yellow paved road.
Off to see the wizard.
Of true love.
So I can be happy.
I come to decisions,
That do not seem to end.
But its all worth it.
I'm going to be happy.
I've made it,
To the lovely palace of love.
I'm finally going to be happy.
But when I step inside,
Its dark,
Its cold.
All I see is a dark sign that reads
Be back,
Never.

Baby, that's the time we tried to sort out the times we couldn't bear each other anymore.
And while the days grow short I'm screaming the hints at you but baby,
You're oblivious.
Darling my hearts beats are shortening.
And my breath is slowing.
Everything tears me apart.
And that's why I crave your existence in my life.
I crave your touch,
I crave your mind
I crave your humour.
But love, you can't be mine.
But the days are getting longer.
And sometimes Im going to want to hold your hand.
And simply.
You're never going to be there.
You'll move on.
And I'm going to be of the past.
And baby.
Maybe I won't be there anymore.

So many people get hurt in this world.
I happen to fall a lot.
And every time I fall,
I get hurt.
Commen sense right?
Brutality rushes through my mind when I think about falling
Butterflies align my insides making me lose the memories I've had.
And each time I fall harder
I'm just another one of those attacking souls that can't keep myself away.
Because if Im brutal enough,
I'll be known to have no heart.
And no heart will he broken,
Once a valentine of a sweet boy,
To a destroyed soul that can't get enough.
Darling,
So many people get hurt in this world
I happen to fall a lot.
Until my heart leaks of truth,
Until someone shows me different..
Darling, I'll have to pass up your offer.

I'm happy for you
I'm so happy that you let go
In a day
I'm happy for you
I'm so happy that you lied to me
So you could get her to stay.
Before I could warn her
So here's to his brand new lover
Good luck
I'm happy for you
I'm so happy that you can be crushed over and over again,
That you can be drown in lies
And I'm especially happy to see you slowly break down
So that you can come back and ask me for advice, because I'd gone through it for years.
Well darling
All I can do is laugh at you
Its a guilty pleasure.
Seeing someone so hurt, by the one I had been by.
Making their way to where I am
I'm so happy for you.
And I've got one thing to tell you
From the bottom of my soul
Good luck
I couldn't tell you if you're strong enough.
Its a living hell
As cruel as it sounds,
I'm happy for you.

Dearest future me.

Life's brought you down
You've drowned
I hope you're satisfied,
With yourself.
I know that you've let go of society.
I need you to know that you're loved.
Believe that.
I don't know what its going to be like in the generation now..
But if societies like it is now,
Rather worse,
Hang in there.
You've let your soul slip in the past,
And you've let time get away from you.
Society kills
Like a gun
Restore it
To the best of your ability.
Because I'm not sure if you remember or not,
What its like for your old self.
I'm sure youre remembering.
Let it go.
Start over.
Society,
Its an action.
Rather than anything else.
Be society.
Be that action that moves the world
Positively.
You're strong.
Hold on.

Darling please don't fail me now.
Because right now,
All I can hear is the sound of your voice.
Remember those films we used to tape?
Ive played them back, now everyday.

Darling don't fail me now.
The days are getting longer.
The darkness keeps getting stronger.
And baby its getting harder and harder to conquer.

Darling don't fail me now.
Society's getting farther.
A little like that quote told by Peter Parker.
Mental illness is growing larger.

Darling please don't fail me now.
In this time of desperation,
Do you have an explanation?

Darling. Please.

Don't fail me now.

His eyes shone
Like a single star
In my very dark reality.

Ill just be here smoking my cigarette like i always do, youre right there next to me, already smoked two.

Lighting one after another till they burn out flilling our lungs with waste.

Soon you'll finish your cigarettes and you'll leave like you always do.

Slowly burning until you have finished your daily pack.



Our love was like these cigarettes.

Burning to waste until youve finished your daily dosage of me.

Soon you'll get up and leave, but whats to worry?

You have another carton to waste.

tonight there's a fire in texas
& it's screaming out for the all the bodies it's lost there
in some grand american war
in someone else's glorious battle

the backyard tree was too high for you to climb
& so you took a jaunt to the brooklyn bridge and jumped
to see what it was like to fly

& tonight there's a fire in her chest that bleeds
for her father's bones to be buried next to hers
even though for years he didn't know her name
or what her laugh sounded like
i guess he forgot to check the post

& tonight there's a broadcast on the radio
the presidents been assassinated
& somehow that's your fault
for being to open about your love for your best friend, tom
who also happens to be a boy

& tomorrow there'll be an earthquake in memphis
& it'll be because there's too much *** on tv
god must be flapping his wings hard enough to shake
our great and grand scheme of things

& yesterday a little girl lay awake in her bed
counting her ribcage to make sure she can see every bone
she's praying she won't lose track of them under the meat

& tonight i will drink a tall glass of wine
so i can feel something
other than all the pain we've created for each other

Staying up later than anyone else
means you get to eat whatever, and however you want,
it means you can think however you want,
you can do whatever you want,
you can literally be whoever you want to be when you stay up late,
because nobody can stop the way you position yourself in life late at night.