I question the laws which are shared among our youth during these hard times; we have no great war, no question that burns the nations to their knees blaring. We simply have our poverty and power, our endless struggles and our eating disorders.
                We are the nation of winners and runners; we are the hypocrites of our father’s religion. Welcome to America, so jam packed with fast foods and cigarettes that you can hardly taste the reality before it has bombed you down.
                And then there’s you, and you’re sitting there, staring at the screen… laughing at the mother with the black and white face have her daughter slaughter and eat her, and I’m laughing to, trying to hide the little girl inside me screaming.
                “Kiss me,” I’ve had enough broken hearts and sleepless nights to know what it means to have a hand to hold and a body to cling to when the street lights flicker and people ponder about your past.
                Talk to me, open your mouth and share with me the secrets of your mother, tell me what tragic car accident brought you to this position and how far you’d run to hold her hand. Question my beliefs and my relationships. Chose kind words over replaceable concerns, fight for my attention, and question my devotion. I want to watch movies with you, discuss some kind of universe beyond my mind, and our boundaries, hold me close while the lights in the theater are dim we’ll dance behind the stage. The lights will be our stars, predict my future with your soft hands and gentle grin.
                Because you’re a stranger, I can get away with wanting, because you’re new to me, I can fantasize, holding your hand in mine, resting my head on your chest, listening to your heart beat as you sleep.
                Because I’m alone tonight, I can ****** a thought, fish for a chance to be on my own with you. Tell me something; open your mind to the possibilities of me and you.
Of course, all this is wasted on time, and I’ve tried to send you signals, I want to be your friend, I want to talk to you into the late hours, stand in the midnight man’s circle sweating, calling out into the darkness, sharing songs and secrets until the dawn shatters our dream.
Then the bell rings, and you move, get up and leave, go outside to smoke, and my mind goes blank, the thoughts and dreams of the tomorrows that we could have spent together have disappeared, into nonentity. The audacity of my fantasies have brought me nothing, so I move back to questioning the laws which are shared among the youth of these hard times, and I am shaken into a reality of obesity and anorexia, of Christians and Muslims fallen in line with the atheists, I don’t mind, because tomorrow, we’ll meet again and I’ll smile and you’ll nod, and I’ll dream while you giggle.

her tongue tastes like ashes, her voice cracks when she’s lying.
you throw imperfections, because you know you can’t have her.
If you say it out loud you can’t keep denying. You need her.
you can’t go to sleep without envisioning her beside you.
Her hands entangled in your hair, she’s screaming.
her soft brown hair looks red in the naked moonlight
Your mind plays games, you awaken and she’s gone.
You’d give anything to taste her lips.
She’s dying to pass your way.
her size five feet dangle on the edge of infidelity.
while you wait for her to sway.  
Or stay.vigilant.
in your mind, you can hear her sighs from the next room.
Let’s pretend for a moment, she’s sighing for you.
*ah

When i see them together my heart drops
such a distance between my throat to my lowest point
my mind believes she’s worth more
but who am i to question her price
when i too have stayed.
her hands tingle when she walks.
the distance between her self worth
and her incomparable lust
trumps his long gaze
his wide lips
his thin eyes
her small hips.
shrinking sickly.
one more package.
smoke them quickly.

Lola could laugh at his anger.
He could smile at her tears.
they could never be together
even after all these years
the policemen they came running
the officers had dogs
but Lola she was stunning.
even after the night time flogs
when the stars were high as drops outs
and the moon was wasted on air
the two of them imperfect
were perfect laying there.

I was created to destroy
resurrected to ****
and where I hailed I was known as the rain
and now that I’m here I’ve been named.
Ashamed, but what is in a name?
What is called blood, by any other name would still taste as sweet.
And cause me to retreat into the darkness
leaving behind my sick mess and
your body,
rotting.
I was destroyed to create
killed to be resurrected
Where there is rain, I pelted like hail
Now that I am ashamed, I am but a name

Your body is nameless and stripped of it’s existence.

So it’s 11:46 and she’s dreaming.
curled up beside me like fingers around luke warm tea.
I would kiss her head if I could
hold her in my arms, like I should.
but my mind belongs somewhere else
a seeping darkness pulling, pushing, pursing me.
To stay around, but not.
With her.
Just sit a little, she had said.
You need a place to rest.
That was three weeks ago,
Now I need to move
away from her beauty, as it intoxicates me.
Her smile as it fills me with dread.
I’ve been here before
it’s so easy to stay.
maybe I should just say…
“I’m not hungry.”

She starts, awake in me.
she stretches, like she’s been asleep for centuries.
“It’s nice to see you again, old friend”
I wish I could say the same to you.
I should get up, I should go…
but she’s so tempting…
I guess in the end I
am alone again.

Kind of a tickle
Sort of a trickle
Tastes like rust
And broken nails
I’ve given in, fail.
Slit a wrist,
Take a piece of glass.
Don’t worry this too shall pass.