These ***** ****** they want to **** me with their devil horns, probably because I'm above the norm, or maybe just because I'm normal. I'm always invited to the party, but it's never formal. Walking down the corn rows, a little child is chasing after wielding a knife of some sort. I stop and smile back and we both erupt in laughter. Skating by the pasture, maybe I just shouldn't write, maybe I should end my life. I don't know who can save me. I feel like all my friends deep down they hate me. It doesn't matter anyway, they're all complacent, mangy little hippy wannabes. None of you could match any one of me because you can only see as far as eyes can see and I can see that you've been so blatantly dishonest and untruthful. I hope you die in a bowl of cereal because you're all a bunch of fruit loops. God if you're there please show me your sympathies and destroy all of my enemies. I can  sometimes hear the symphonies while I'm overdosing choking on *******. Hopefully I'll die in infamy something like Cobain. I had a nine millimeter once and tried to blow out my brain, but it jammed. Maybe I'm just ****** to living this awful life. That's capital punishment if you ask me. Only if I died would I truly be free. Sink me in a ship at the bottom of the sea.

Sometimes I feel stuck in the matrix, complacent, I know you don't want me to say this, but I'm just impatient to make it better because it seems like it's now or never. Will we ever end up together, only time will tell. Many people talk to me as if I was well, well I'm not. The thought of losing you makes me weak and unable to speak for I'm ashamed to see the pain in your eyes that I've inflicted. Our love is constructed but I'm addicted to you. Every thing has fallen apart because of my choice to neglect you. My heart is pounding with sorrow when you tell me that you feel like you were just used and borrowed. I can't promise tomorrow, but I can promise this is from the heart. I want to start again and befriend one another then once again become lovers. I love no other, although it may seem like a lie. I've let you down and those who support me. Teleport to me.

A clock tower chimes gracefully in the distance.

My time has ceased to exist long before I ever got the chance to see it, I've missed it.

The virtues that I long for dwell not in this forsaken world.

No longer will a boy grow tall and strong.

Now he will complain of the strain and pain inflicted by the selfish souls that pre existed.

My time has came and went, but I seem to have missed it.

I'm a killer, blood red. Heart filled with confusion and body disillusioned.

Blood in blood out, this is the life I chose and I don't care whether you think its right or wrong.

I spend my nights out, but don't be scared, theres nothing to fear.

Into this world we're born, and in this world we'll die.

Family will cry, but not a tear in this eye for I have seen the dream so many of you claim to be the ambition for fame, torn and burned.

Scorched are the bodies of lust and deception that neglect to respect my ethic.

Don't test it just accept it my dear.

Sometimes everything seems so out of hand and it makes me wish that I could be a better man. I'm so blessed to call you mine. Someone like you is so hard to find. Truly someone like you is so hard to find and I'm blessed to call you mine. In time everything will be okay, just know tomorrow there's a brighter day. You've gotta learn and do it in your own way. Don't let a fool teach you that you have to be a certain way. Success comes in all shapes and forms. Just know that you're above the norm. There'll come a time when I'll be in your mind but I wont be there. Just know that I'm with you and I'll always care. It may be hard to understand but, just know tomorrow I'll be a better man.

We're living in a world like the matrix. All we can do is try to make sense of one another's actions and be patient. Reality truly is only what you make it to be. Everything you see is energy, neither created, or destroyed. When we deployed our troops overseas did we ever see the underlying reason. Too many of us are more concerned with the shifting of seasons (The news.) Sometimes I believe it's the eye in the pyramid, then I remember that evil is what you make it, that's why I became a Mason. Its ironic that Saddam was going to sell the oil for Euros. Then Bush came into power and the federal bureau blew up the towers only hours later, we as a nation received confirmation that Iraq was our target for invasion. But how can we blame them as we fuel our cars with the blood soaked tar sands from this foreign land that none of us care to know. Why should we show compassion for fallen soldiers that gave their lives so we would have automobiles that drive. It seems that our demise was prophesied way back in biblical times. I don't find it likely that we'll open our eyes to the lies fed to us from birth. This is my home, this is planet, Earth.

I love how the rain strikes the ceiling panes, subtly inducing this feeling of desire to contemplate anything and everything that carries weight, or has meaning. Maybe I'm just dreaming.
You are, the death of me.

My character has been strained far enough, stained with blood. Why couldn't I have been the model son that maintained his grades, giving way for a better life, for not only myself, but my family. You are, the death of me.

I feel lost in the matrix, searching for the one that'll give me their heart without competition and ulterior intentions detrimental to our friendship. My thoughts are dark, clouded with confusion. I feel used. I feel clueless to that fact that I was naive enough to think you'd ever have my back. You are, the death of me.

A storm is conjuring, building momentum. When the fame comes, I'll have no choice but to forget them. I've always felt that I was from a different dimension, but have never felt the need to mention this to anyone. Because you were, the death of me.

You've been on my mind for some time and I can hardly let it go. I've been trying to find something as incredible as you and I for all my life. You've had me thinking we're inevitably meant to be something special, and the feeling hasn't changed since the day I met you.
You dress and express yourself in a way that words can't explain or describe how inimitable the vibe. Nevertheless it doesn't really seem odd to me because from my perspective your life has been nothing short of an odyssey. You're kiss is like a drug to me you see, and the way we look into one another's eyes is so heavenly that I can't help but let myself be drown in your beautiful melodies. I want to show you that my heart is serene despite the tragedies that have befallen upon me, and that my soul is gold, a true gift from the heavens above to the woman whom I may choose to love. You destroyed my belief in a preconceived image of beauty in such a way that conveys the picture clear as day. It's not hard to see how strong and sweet your desires for intimacy can be simply because I genuinely treat you differently. That's what makes you irresistibly tempting. I want to feel that feeling of love again. I need you to be a lover but most importantly, a friend. And so it begins, can we withstand the temptations of sin and lust? I believe you should know that I'm someone to trust because my intentions with you are anything but. I hope you can understand the sense in which I arrange these sentences if you really think about it, the possibilities are quite endless. So let me end this by saying thank you and that I appreciate every second you take and give to me.