If I clean my room, then I
can allow myself to be
happy.
But, at the end of the day
I'm just a sad girl
sad in a very large room.

I could give us forever, my love.
I could give you forever.
It's not selfish of you,
to want to die is natural.
But, I want you for more
than the natural time given.

I have wandered this earth,
lost and lonely.
Waiting for someone, who I didn't
even know.
Your wick is burning low,
and the wax has evaporated.

How could you stand to leave me?
I can give us more.
I want more.

I'm shaking as I go down to meet you
and I don't like to see you in chains.
I know, I know.
Shh, listen-
It isn't time yet...
I need more time.

I know my efforts are fruitless in the end,
because the chains were never locked.

In another life,
we would wake up intertwined.
Silly grins on our faces,
and teasing each other about
our morning breath.

In that life,
we are kind and loving.
Playful kisses, and reasonable fights.

To me, you will never be
The one that got away.
Instead, I let go of something
that was not meant for this life.

In my mind
you are in my arms
loving me without thought
but you aren't you
and i am alone.

I want to tear you off,
cauterize the wound,
and never think of you again.
How dare barbarism overcome
something that has grown upon me?
Turned from child into tumor.
One part of my body I actually
had grown to appreciate,
soiled by a sober man
to a drunk teenager.

exhausted, ill, and young
I trodded along to meet you.
I felt dizzy and tired, yet
still I went to meet you.
Is it because we were young?
That now I realize that sickness
and in health should not be
at my own expense.