I'm waiting for the one
Sitting on the edge
Dreaming of me and you
Who are you ?

Dear future me
I wonder what you'll see
Will I be gorgeous?
Or a hideous monster?
Will I be a doctor,lawyer,fashion designer?
Or a **** that is sitting in jail?
Will I be  successful?
Will I have a kid?
Will my dream come true?
How many more years future me till I'm not depressed?
Will I not be ashamed anymore?
I don't know if I will ever know...
I hope it will be great I don't want to be a failure

When I was 8,
You said it was okay.
It's normal
Since when is ****** abuse normal
I didn't know this till 4th grade,
11yrs old ....
You snuck under my covers when I was sleeping
How could I have not felt you when you tried at first
I woke up with you on top of me
Why did I like it at first
I'm a discusting,horrible human
I told in 4th grade cuz I wanted to know if it was normal.
Turns out it wasn't
You made me think it was my fault
Your to blame
I know you won't read this ,
But I hope you for in hell
You took my childhood away
Said it was okay
I thought you were my friend
I'm sorry I was to little for ***
You were going to wait a few more years
Why me??
Why?
Is this why I hate myself
You make me want to throw up
I hope you learn from prison
Why did you take my childhood ?

It's pulls me closer and closer to my death
It pulls me back and won't let me go
It's like a game were you don't win you die either way,
It doesn't have to be physically but mentally,
Depression is my killer.

She walk to class with a smile
Beautiful,thin,nice that's what you seen right?
She was happy
That all changed one day

She lived in a nightmare
She couldn't get out no matter how hard she tried
She would cry till she couldn't anymore
She kept to herself,no one wanted her  
She told herself its okay but she knew it wasn't
She felt like nothing,useless,scared,terrified

That one day she stood in the bathroom
Tired of her life
She felt like there wasn't an end to the way she felt
She couldn't take it


She layed in her bed writing her note
She was ready to go
That night it was her time
She went to the bathroom


Got the one pill bottle that was the strongest
Took 12 pills
Numb she said I feel numb.
Death was what she wanted
She sat there hoping,
Then she was gone forever

Her family blamed themselves
What could they have done differently
Nothing she said in her note,
Her parents cried
She was never forgotten
Is it really worth it?
Did she have to go?