Nature boy,
Dont write to me when the grounds you tend wont be fertilized by lies, like vines weaving their way, crawling whispers to crack your hard head cemented soul (hardly even believe your own *******, why would I?) Dont write to me when you wish your life flourished full as mine, rays of being youll never see someone near as divine. You tried to catch me in the wake of a watered down climate.. guess ya cant count your corporate chicks before they hatch, huh? Don't write to tell me a sorry hunter story. You've shot down too many birds to tell me you wish I would've flown. Bird call claim to live a life without wondering what life is worth.. well, i can tell you its more than paycheck work, more than parents approval, more that shiny things to shield eyes from your lack of self work. I think if youd had it all together you wouldn't have pulled me into the dirt but it seems you stirred the soot between my toes. I'm taking root, cracking ground bound in renewed resilience. Oh, and nature boy? Just know, it feels so good to grow out of you.

You are not sinking
You are naturally buoyant
If you only breathe deeply

Solitary confinement
Hard to find a need
In ease of social security
Though funds run out
Seldom sought future of own
Unknown
Selfish disclosure
Going without
Relished reality me
Found distractions in each we
Covergirl coverup
For a face hardest to face

Skimming the surface of your sweetness
Creamy rich creme brulee
with a je ne said quois kick
Skin of sprinkled seasonings
Looks like art
In all sensory scintillation
Delicate dashes
Deliberate divinity finds
A splash of savior savory
Boil up smiles
Bubble over in rounds
Popping sizzle
Of a new recipe spark
Invite chance to the table
And me without manners
Fumbled elbows atop a table
Unrefined as an innocent palette
Fear finds fruitful fools as I
Always want another taste
Insatiable sensations
Shake me
Never the same
A want to swish you in my mouth
So you know my words stir smoother sound space
Than my mind lets on
Imagine a ticking timer
For me or you
Cant just swelter in the smell
Saliva sweat on hot stovetop
Tease your texture between teeth
I find gritted in a past
Of al dente pasta
Not quite my liking
But always filling
How hard to be full
Of a hearth of health
When i've been so long
Waited on by baited service
Couldn't help but take a bite
I got hooked
Reeled in line to choke on breathing
Luck lifeline
To see release
Catch a nibble
Insist I taste
Your full flavor
Ever evolving buds
Dissolve new resolve
From tongue
Of trepidation
Swirled in soufflee one day
Tiramisu on through
To courses I never knew
In glistening garnishes
Playful plating
Dining halls of hope
Glazed eyes
Fancy this feast
Mixed anew
Set you a place
Its fit for two

I can't feel you anymore.. but when I think I almost can my ears burn hot. I swear it was your breath on them that made mine quicker. I've felt the way your lips laquered my earrings clink against your teeth I don't think I can hear my own voice in my head anymore you've slurred it all to a resonant mmmmhmmm. Funny how frogs won't jump out of boiling water and i'm choking on another vision of you choking me, hard inside me. I guess I knew you never wanted to hear my real voice. Just a throat crushing squeak never easy to shush me but I let you. I let you whisper inadequacies into my soul till I wasn't sure I had one but I was always more soulful seeping so I thought your shriveled heart could soak me up. Soak us both but you wanted a stream line trickle. Predictable, not so fickle. Im nothing if not an intangible tide tossing showers of sediment to swirl in new space. There is no space for your sturdy stillness settling was something I tried to do for you. But the breeze doesn't stop when you're standing still, I couldn't pause the tides of will. Still see you so scared of drowning never treked past where toes could touch. But boy I am much fuller than you'll feel, much deeper than you'll see. Seldom stray far from shore shapes shallow eyes caught beneath. I've been listening to the clouds. I've been singing a new heat. Tell myself again, I'm worthy. I am worthy of love from me. In a quake of sadness shake dust from the places you touched. Solace in the touch of a new he. Nothing like a brush with your body but I'm remembering what it's like to feel free. Wavering joy with sadness missing you and hating you and forgiving you and forgiving myself and forgetting to love myself remembering loving you then finding the hurt you gave me and piecing it into a poem I've lit on fire twice now, rewriting my mind won't be as easy as I thought but my heads above the water and the sun might take a peak. I know there's forces fear won't foster. Trading past for future cut like a movie scene. Where I command role of self. Self assured. Rest assured my waves will crash. I will stop hating them the way you taught me to. Some soul will swim strokes with the fish, learn their names and places. Some soul will surf my biggest waves, tuck them into the shore. Calm and twirl my tides with ease it was easy to believe you could catch with such bait but I can't blame you for getting sea sick. For slight of heart has no place in mine. I wager these waters will draw a Poseidon sink or swim.

Ghostly nostalgia
Train hopper
Restless receipt
Dream itch
Shoo fly
Full sigh
Track tie
Leftover glances
Slapped happy
Wind swivel
Velcro catch
Flu faced
Stake claim
No reentry

****** off stripper spit
Loose lips
Eyes locked
On wallet
Congrats, slick
Close up on a slimy siren trick