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Hester Jacobsz Aug 2020
This burden is hard, im feeling lost
silence is deafening, everything threatening
my heart more than broke;
deaths fingers gave the last stroke
now again im at a road with a cross
do i succumb, do i fight, please help im at a loss
deep within me im screaming
please help me, i know im not dreaming
my all consuming mind has me in a bind
pain slicing within making me blind
my heart is breaking no strength to keep fighting
death again had its day
taking without me having a say
emotions, tears, anger and questions i have so many
i know i can not stay lost
i must again stand up at all cost
i must endure, i must ensure that i go on
i must find a way back from the ether
but for now within my broken heart i can and shall stay silent and lost
deaths clutches can not reach me
down here
deep in my mind where no one can see or hear
for now just let me be
in time i will rise again you'll see
i will not stay lost
be patient for standing again comes with a cost

Hester Jacobsz Jun 2014
To stand and look in a mirror
One see thy self, no not just one self
But a soul, utterly broken, words left unspoken
A darkened hole where my soul use to call home,
Im lost, no light, no God hearing my plite,
Nothing will ever feel right
All feels helpless, no hope, no light, no forgiveness
How will I fight, im empty?
How will I live im lost, I see but dont see
I hear but dont hear,
A empty vessel, walking
A empty vessel watching,
Please see me, hear me, hear my cries
I need mending, my soul is torn my heart ripped
One touch will have me down on my knees,
Im still a soul, im still lost, im still empty,
Not by choice, not by weakness,
Open your eyes and see, dont watch but see.....
Me, broken and empty and all alone....

— The End —