With a proud smile
She showed us the packet
Of cigarettes
Stashed away
In her draw.

And my mind,
My naive, thirteen year old mind
Started whirling
With stories
Of addiction.

And to their horror
And to my horror
I began to cry
Quite hysterically
Scared and confused.

I am not thirteen anymore
I am not naive anymore
But when confronted with situations
That I have seen
Only in story book
I don't know how to handle them.

I run away,
I cry,
I don't take things into perspective,
Even though the problems
Are real,
And ones I might be able to help with
And not mine.

I should know better
I should learn
From now on
To not run away,
But running,
Is not rational
It's natural
And automatic
Only later regretting
The things I have done.

I should know better. I should learn. I have set a new goal.

All of human kind
Has embarked on a mission
To keep time.

Place your hand on your
Clock and turn it back,
One hour, together, all
Of man kind.

We have all embarked
On a mission to make
Time a better place.

Place your hand on
The big red button.

Now press.

I wanted to hug
My shadow
But the stone wall
Wouldn't budge

They were tired and wore
Matching jumpers and I
Wanted to be with them.

I dive headfirst                              
Into a wonderland
                     Of my own making
Into the wishful thinking
                                                                  That is its creator
                                    Cutting and sticking
Pieces of my life
                                     Until they envelope me
                                                                      In their being
In my being
                          And I am surrounded
Unable to escape
                                                            Myself, the place from which
All try to constantly
                                                                        Escape, I am trapped
                        In the whole I dug,
And fell through, into
                                                                              Wonderland, I
   Am my own wonderland
                                       And I have made a choice
                                                                 To enter and come out
Sane.