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Helen McKean Apr 2010
the drunkard crawls from an infinite sea of sadness,
their screams echo
                                                                                        into an enormous black sky,
upon finding their sun
                                             which was once an incessant ***** red,
now a cold mass of midnight blue,
abandoning its worshipper
to revel in darkness,
                 to freeze from a deathly chill of loneliness,
                                  to melt from the nights' stinging raindrops of reality.
but the drunkards,
and only the drunkards,
are secretly admitted
                                into the hollow asylum of the traitorous mind,
              where some imagined eerie light
                                            bathes the shadows,
              where they feel the solitude enveloping their bodies
                                                                                                  with an alien warmth,
              where the raindrops intoxicate their insides
                                                                                like thick, sugary syrup;
a place where they
willingly drug themselves
into an ignorant stupor,
                                                                                painting translucent
                                                                                                   dreams of yesterday
upon the undersides of their eyelids,
                               and seeing them
                                             as the art of the future.
solely possessing the key
to the invisible shackles
that chain them
to equally invisible walls,
                they lie back in relief,
                                                               upon silken feather dust pillows,
comforted by a styrofoam fortress,
while blissfully wasting away
                                                                                                                 in their drunken
                                                                                    narcotic haven.
1998
Helen McKean Apr 2010
like a damp newborn
my wings have yet to dry,
but no longer required
to inch on stubby caterpillar legs,
unfolding, yielding to the sky.

growing,
bigger or stronger?
shedding the skin
that until now catered to your touch;
without ears
(for you supply no words)
listening with my tongue
for your toxic presence.

a ball of fluff,
that cannot swim,
who you leave to drown,
rises up out of the water
its wings sleekly curved
stunningly bright, bold, and beautiful.

and you wonder
at the transformations,
even though you were
the noxious chemicals
that began these
beneficial mutations.
1998
Helen McKean Apr 2010
my love is like...
        the sea,
                during a tumultuous storm
                capturing innocent victims
                dragging them down in its fury
                and conquering them in the end.

my love is like...
        knives,
                long and sharp
                being thrown simultaneously
                at one lone target
                piercing it through
                so that it never can be used again.

my love is like...
        the bite of a venomous snake,
                sinking its fangs
                into unsuspecting prey
                paralyzing them into helplessness
                and then mercilessly
                swallowing them whole.

my love is like...
        a bottomless abyss,
                into which stumble the lost
                and once realizing their mistake
                they find it is too late
                for they are destined to be
                forever falling
                to their death.
September 1997
Helen McKean Apr 2010
The safety of your arms
protects me from harming myself
out of curiosity,
leashed to your control
keeps me from flying higher than you,
your *******
lordingly rules over my passive acquiescence.
I proclaim my independence
but am forced to let you carry me,
I make my own decisions
as long as they make you happy,
I speak my mind freely
depending on what you like to hear,
because upsetting you would mean
that I would have to live for myself -
my one fear which I dream of overcoming,
my one dream I am too scared to attempt.
you say I should stand up for what I believe,
yet every time I timidly rise
you degradingly suggest I sit down.
as you tell me I am free
we both subconsciously know
your superiority has again obstructed your justice,
you are giving me no chances before I even ask,
you have already determined my value as less than yours,
and you have destined my fate to be insignificant and foolish.
I dare to resist
and your eyes promptly glare,
fiendishly laughing,
because you know that as the words leave my lips
I am already defeated,
and that you have again been victorious
in this sadistic game of power -
and you know that you will always win.
January 1998

— The End —