I smile because i see through your charade,
I frown because i know the pain you conceal is my fault.
My days are dark because i never seem to be looking at the sun,
My nights are bright because our friendship glows.
I splash through the rain looking up at the sky,
I scuff my feet through the day watching my life pass away.
I break free not looking as i tumble down the tree covered *****,
Hiking back up to run back down to 'feel free one more time'.
I'm sleeping in the day,
Prowling in the night.
Living for each moment,
Finding no regrets.
Laughing,
Crying.
Living,
Dying.

I can't stay in this cage you've made,

I've been folded just to fit inside.

My legs are aching,

The will to run is strong.

You throw food between my bars,

Afraid to get too close.

I gnaw anxiously at the lock,

Claw at the floor,

Wine and cry.

You come bearing a bowl,

I smell the fresh wet scent,

I show my teeth,

Growl deep from the pit of my stomach,

I'm so thirsty.

You walk past,

Your attention on me is wrongly timed.

My legs,

hurt.

They buckle beneath me and I fall,

My mouth is dry,

My blood runs thick,

My heart slows,

My eyes close,

The cage is gone.

Nothing but endless forest.

I feel slow steady pain,

Welcoming to these useless limbs.

Then i run,

For eternity.

Swallowing my pride, opening closed doors.
Remembering the days that you would call me yours.
Words I'd lost in space and time,
Come floating back into my mind.
The times we laughed, and times we cried,
The day you came and said you'd lied.
Like every thing we'd known before, this too came to an end.
Maybe someday soon to you, this letter I will send.

Smiling forward towards the sun,
Now you see what you've become.
Chosen fate you can't decide,
The earth opens, a mile wide.
Something rises, takes your hand,
Slowly smile as you descend.

New day, same old feelings. Like no matter what you can't seem to escape the shadow of your thoughts, no matter how bright the sun. Brand new bag, slung on the same old shoulders. Since you were five they've worn their place there. Same bold face in the mirror, wipe away the tears and smile against the waves crashing against you. Brand new people, same old faces. New day, same old feelings.

She falls under,
The mistakes she couldn’t stand.
He tries one last time,
To faithfully hold her hand.
She doesn’t notice,
Everything she had.
He turns away,
Feeling all but sad.
Every word he’d ever said,
She knows she deserves.

The black canvas sits,
Gathering dust.
Let sleeping ghosts lie,
Leave them kept inside.
Glance quick on the past,
Move toward the rising sun.
Blinding,
Dust floats through the beams.
If I could see where I was headed,
Would I keep walking?
I guess this is where we find,
If we were meant to be.
Turning to the moon,
Never hurt this much.

If I told you that,
My head just keeps sayin no,
But my heart keeps givin in.
Could we stop this crazy pain filled game?
Cause lovin is for winners,
And so far ive done nothin but lose.
But I can't turn my back,
Cause you know I can't trust that much.
The bullet holes down my spine,
Tell the story that no one will hear.
But sometimes I'd rather forget,
The lessons I've already learned.

To start again,
To let the innocence guide me,
To believe the fairytales.
But now prince charming is the villian,
And the princess is long gone.
The shining feeling has left,
Replaced by black.
But the light at the end of this tunnel,
Holds promises I'm ready to keep.

Sign your name,
Just above that dotted line.
Push past those thoughts,
Show that you can smile and shine.

Tear down those walls,
That slow down your heart.
Go looking for good,
Find something new to start.

Eat up your past,
Till its not who you are.
Push past those memories,
Treat them as nothing more than a scar.

Turn away and forget.
Say goodbye to the pain.
Grin as big as you can,
Treat this life as a game.

Broken winds,
Sailing through the grass.
Endless it sees all.
Every broken promise,
Every spoken word,
It carries on it's sails.

Taking prisoner all that is meant.
The meak and the unloved,
It wraps around them,
Comforts as no human can.

I sit here,
The wind blowing my hair,
Lonely I listen to the words it speaks,
As it plays through the weeds.
It tells me of the secrets it knows,
Of the great things that it has seen.

I sit and wonder,
If I will ever see them too.
I sit and ponder for my future,
And gently I whisper it my legacy,
To someday come back to me.

I’m stronger than I thought
He will never be forgotten
the memories will take time
but with time will hold no more than a smile for me
And in this note is just to tell him
that I always loved him
and I always will
but sometimes time and circumstance
tear people apart
against their will
love is a silly thing
and sometimes doesn’t work out the way you might want it.
But things will be okay
the dawn is coming.

“Sing me a song” I asked quietly.
He listened to the words and saw no need.
He hummed along to the melody
not knowing it was the words that I so desperately wanted to him to speak.
He never really listened until it was too late,
never took the time to hear the words
behind the notes and chords.
Then that day came around,
when he finally understood.
Why I wanted him to sing those words to me,
that they meant so much more than the melody.

Today I finally see,
That love can never end,
Although our dim lives can.
But it’s not what we take with us,
Its what we leave behind.
I’ve never been this scared,
That this life is all I have,
And if it’s gone before I know,
Then how will I be sure.
That what we had was there,
That was we had was pure.

But how will I know,
If when I’m gone forever,
people will remember,
What I wore today,
but what I said,
That touched their hearts.

Love can never end,
He whispered sweetly to me,
This secret melody.
“So just hold my hand I’ll let you know I care,
I promise.
That if we fall apart,
I will remember you,
Your right here in my heart.
I may not remember,
The color of your eyes,
Your face may fade in my mind.
But my heart will warm,
when I think about this moment.”

But how will I know,
If when I’m gone forever,
people will remember,
What I wore today,
But what I said,
that touched their hearts.

Nothing but lonely words on my paper.
Dying to be read,
Resisting the urge to take flight.
Waiting for your eager eyes,
To unlock the secrets,
Beneath all these nothing words.
But you sit ignorant,
Of everything I’ve ever said,
Of everything that I’ve ever had to say.
Sitting letting the words flow within your mind,
Never caring,
Never wondering,
Of their hidden meaning.
So They sit unlocked and lonely,
Just like their creator.

I could blow your mind with my words,
If you could only listen.
But my words can’t change the world,
If they can’t even change your mind.
So then,
Their just these lonely words on my paper,
Dying to be read.

The sun shone on my face keeping me warm.

I fall asleep wrapped in blankets,
Wishing I was in your arms.
But I can't seem to find you,
My eyes have been glued shut.
Singing sweetly to me,
Telling me your home.
But hearing it makes me burn and fly,
Makes me want to die.

So whisper my name softly,
I'll be whispering yours too.
Someday soon I'll have you,
Someday soon you'll see.

The word it terrorfies me,
I part my lips to say.
Just one more time I promise,
This time I'll make you stay.
So please, please don't give up on me,
This time,
Was the last time.

So whisper my name softly,
I'll be whispering yours too.
Someday soon I'll have you,
Maybe then you'll see.
Just how much I love you,
I know it's a horribble cliche.
But this time i know i mean it,
Now can you just say.

Because this time,
Will not be the last time.
Please hold me in your arms tonight,
lie, even if you can.
This time I'll be sorry,
This time I can leave.
Cause I don't want to lose you,
I don't want to stay.

So whisper my name softly,
I'll be whispering yours too.
Someday soon I'll have you,
Maybe then youll see.

I’m listening to a long ago made mix CD.
These songs all have meaning,
all have memories.
And I’m wrapping myself in them,
although I shouldn’t be.
I don’t mind,
because the words speak to me,
unlike they speak to you.
They sing right to my soul,
and tell me that I’m home.
So ill wrap myself up in them,
they help to keep me warm.
And maybe when I wake again,
the cold will leave me whole.
So sing, sing these words for me,
when I no longer speak.
On your last breath say these things once more,
these words will keep you warm.

There's a Cracken in my bathtub,
A police box down the street,
I even saw a little fawn, whose eyes I chanced to meet.

A man once tried to drink my blood,
Before taking to the skies,
Another simply did transform, right before my eyes.

A great scaly beast spread its wings,
as I opened up my door,
Breathing fire as it went, it burned me to the floor.

A dark old broom raced 'cross the sky,
Just as the sun began to rise,
A hairy man ran past my tent, surely in disguise.

One dark morn I saw a curving neck,
Rising from the loch,
Circles written here and there, ruining the crop.

If you don't believe this story,
That I have now told,
Maybe someday soon, these things you will behold.

Situations like weights piling on top of me,
Without a break I am overcome.
Reach out to you for comfort,
Everything I gave you when you needed.
All I get from you is a cold shoulder,
Pushing me away for feelings I try to control.
I never judged you or tried pushing you away,
When things were too hard for you to bear.
I dropped thoughts for you,
When you just wanted to forget rather than have them be known.
Looked after you and picked you up when you fell,
Why is it so hard for you to do the same?

The marks across my arms,
They hold a greater meaning inside my past.
Its like one step forward,
but two steps back,
in everything I do.
Realizing I’m just speaking to the youth,
and the airwaves.

I think that love,
is just a cliché story.
Marking the ties that bond,
the knives that sever.
Happily ever after,
Never seemed farther away.

I just don’t like the steps I took to get here,
Finding this it has its deeper price.
The weights have shifted against me,
I always thought that settling never held a cost,
Until now.
Realizing I’m now trapped somewhere deep beneath the floor,
And the ceiling.

I think that love,
is just a cliché story.
Marking the ties that bond,
the knives that sever.
Happily ever after,
Never seemed farther away.

And I just can’t find the pathway back,
To the place that I had started.

And I honestly think that love,
is just another cliché story.

Gravity has kept me down,
within the space between the sky and the ground.

Marking the words that bond,
the lies that sever.

Until there seems no more room,
for this to grow.

Happily ever after,
Never seemed closer today.

A year ago we saw each other
A year ago you said hello
A year ago we started falling in love
A year ago the fall seemed magical.
But now it seems so blank so empty.
The leaves seem to fall so quickly.

A year ago the snow fell softly
A year ago we kept each other warm
A year ago your hand stayed firm in my hand
A year ago our lips told our goodbyes.
But now the snow is cold and empty as before.
the ice seems to stop my steps.

Old promises ring in my head,
slow me till im still just listening
just listening
to the whisperings
that were a year ago

I see your smile,
I would trade the sun for it.
Hear your laugh
and the skies fade away
You drop hints like bread crumbs
that i, a hungry bird follow
smiling
laughing
i fall harder
the sun sinks a little lower
the night sets over me
and im lost
but you take my hand
and comfort me
so different
unlike the others, you stay
and as the sun shows its rays
your hand stays
your smile
your laugh
one happy heartbeat
two hearts
one love.

I can't sleep, though my eyes are weary,

I can't eat, though my stomach is empty.

I can't dream, though my mind is restless,

I can't think about nothing but you.

My muscles clenched and aching,

My heart throbs fast and strong.

the fear that i could lose you,

makes my body cry out in pain.

I'll try desperatley to hide it,

I'm not as strong as you,

though i try.

Lifes not worth living,

without you by my side.

The night whirrs and howls,

calls to me,

but i stay hidden.

I don't want what i used to,

My future dosn't matter,

unless its with you.

Do you want other people?

Just make the hurting stop,

What did i do wrong,

to push you away?

Just tell me that you love me,

That you can't live without me.

Even if your lying,

I'd rather nto face the pain,

the truth,

not tonight.

Shh; wait for the sun,

Idont want to wake up.

Let me lie here,

Warm in your arms.

Kiss my wouds,

Heal me,

Stop the pain.

Be the one i need most,

My heart is breaking.

carry me through,

You promised me you'd keep me safe from pain.

I trust you,

I love you,

I need you,

I dont care past is past.

She wont have you,

Not while i still need you.

I always will,

Will you?

These shackles hold me to the lies.
This pain is just too real.
My heart thunders and my ears roar.
My mind is spinning downward,
Realizing all my wasted time.

I break free.
Breathe,
Relax,
Realize.
Everyone is chained by the lies.
It wasnt only me.
Some were to make others happy.
Some to hurt and cut.
No truth.
I used to think I loved you, I used to think you cared.
Turnes out I wasnt the only one with a life full of wasted time.
Try to speak.
No one listens,
Not really.
Pretending,
Just like lying.
No truth.
Not anymore,
Anywhere.
I wish it wasnt true.

I am from...
...Endless falling from a sky of no sleep and rockstars.
...Backyard barbucues full of no one i know but everyone i'm supposed to.
...Vast wastelands of metal and glass death traps holding lots for most, but nothing for me.
...Ringing sound waves from a freshly broken wooden spoon from hitting my pan too hard.

I am from...
...The clensing pain of surviving by myself.
...Sock monster fights, ripping, arguing, bruising.
...Shouting, loud, bright spartionan battles.
...Broken guitar strings, strung too tight, couldn't hold under pressure, weak.

I am...
...A broken down car with no hope of ever running again.
...A cat trapping a mouse in a corner, smelling its fear, enjoying the game.
...A stryofoam peanut, stuck to the ones around me, never letting go.
...Fighting for my right to live, sad for when the fight is over.

Prowling the night,
I catch your scent,
Strong and alluring.
I chase after it,
Headlong sprint,
Your scent forces memories,
Flooding my mind,
Your all I see.
Not the blurry trees,
Not the mountains rushing past,
Not the shadowy star filled night,
But your smiling face.
How i long to see it again.
Every heartbeat away from you,
Hurts. Burns. Stings.
So i run,
Always running,
To find you again.

Is this our love?
Shattered in the floor, splattered on the walls?
Running dripping it floods my mind.
Our Dreams.Our Words.Our Actions.
My hands are stained with blood,
My mind, with you.
One word did this to us?
Echoes in my head,
Proving false all those perfect moments.
Our Dreams.Our Words.Our Actions.
Did you forget?
The way I made you feel,
The way we moved?
Nothing but ghosts now.
Haunting.Teasing.Laughing.
They mock my misery,
If they only wore my chains...
My heart beats painfully,
Reminding me of life.
Do you feel it too?
My changed dreams.Your nothing words.Out immature actions.

I've ruined happiness,
once again blown a hole between us.
Burns and cinders,
until sides are known.
We all wait until the smoke clears,
and again I stand alone.
Watch as you turn your backs,
for the last time.
I can't fix this wound,
anger holds it open,
peels off the scab to reveal what we are.
Alone,
in darkness I try to find my way.
I'll make it out alive,
my body and mind scarred with the words that had to be said.

I fight against my own walls,
try to break free,
try to trust,
to love.
I've been broken too many times,
used,
lied to,
forgotten.
I'm nothing.
Forgive me,
forget me.
Simple.

I couldn't stand another stare,
From penetrating eyes.
I cannot bear to speak the words,
And hear their mournful sighs.
I can't get out of bed today,
I don't want to see that face,
The one with which just one glance,
Takes me to a secret place.
A place where you smiled just for me,
Where there was only light.
A place where no one points or glares,
Or could raise a word to fight.
I can't get out of bed today,
I'll close my eyes instead.
Dream of you and me again,
Warm here in my bed.

There is a monster deep inside,
The confines of my bed.
It's beady eyes, the dark disguise,
That hides its creepy head.
I can't get out of bed today,
It's teeth they gnash and bite.
If I put a foot down on the floor,
It will surely start a fight.
It's horrible horns they point and curl,
It's coarse grey fur, it reeks!
When it moves its sharp claws scratch,
Its old bones moan and creak.
I can't get out of bed today,
Because you'll surely see.
I can't get out of bed today,
Because the monster's me.