Her eyes are albicant, a crystalline blue fading to white,
closely related to the shade of winter’s mist.
You can see the phantoms of the past within them,
feel the blizzards within her mind,
the haunting thoughts you know she has.
She looks frozen, emotions frosted to her pale face,
framed with dark waves you could drown in.
Through her eyes I see the strain,
pushing against the icy glass that keeps her in.
Whether it’s for the better or worse,
I haven’t the faintest idea,
I remain like a shadow in the night beside her,
hopefully thawing her out with my care.

Could I ever really hate someone?
I'd like to think not.
Though when you go out of your way,
To harm me,
To harm my life,
To harm those I love,
You are truthfully asking for hate, are you not?
Though I will not give you what you want,
I pity you instead,
You poor, poor creature.

Snowflakes fall and the world goes silent.
"Winter is coming, Winter has come."
People and children rush to windows,
In amusement and fear.
"It's so beautiful."
The white comes down and covers everything,
Our world is stained white.
It is frightening.
Curious hands open doors,
Then fall into Winter.

Sometimes, it’s as if I’m flying sky high,
and nothing can bother me.
It’s as if I’ve finally reached the stars,
and nothing can touch me.
It’s like getting a grasp on everything,
and nothing can defeat me.
Then wings get ripped, each feather plucked out,
slowly and ever-so painfully;
I fall, trying so hard to flap useless arms to get back up,
but it’s no use,
The end is inevitable,
this plane’s going down.

My feet hit the pavement hard,
I glance behind me;
(listen...!)
My pulse quickens, deafening thoughts,
(calling them...!)
My muscles tense while dead ones move,
(get out of the way...!)
My mind collapses, slides towards pity,
(you can't afford that...!)
They each had a life before they died;
(no, stop-)
They had people to love and care about,
Had jobs to do,
Conversations.
(back away...!)
I move towards them, tears in my eyes,
(you idiot.)
Ignored my instincts, ignored my logic,
(I'm leaving.)
Embraced a pour soul before he claimed my own.
(And now you're dead!)

Such a cold, bitter winter this was,
though the beauty of it all warmed,
my heart, my mind, my thoughts,
until chilling winds blew once more.

Such unique, lovely compliments they were,
then all for naught; they became,
lies, slander, blasphemy,
now my emotions can stand no more.

Such a smooth, soothing voice he had,
which reassured me all was well,
with me, with him, with life,
but the delusional mirrors aren't clear anymore.

Such a frozen, frostbitten goodbye this is,
leaving a rock thought to be a diamond, now
a fake, an imposter, a joke,
finally showing jagged glass as its true nature.

Wrapping a scarf of memories around my neck,
I walk out into the tundra that was him,
that was me,
that was us;

Though now I have no protection from weather,
my gloves and coat slowly slipping off,
I'd much rather keep in the blizzard,
than remain within his icy, deathly grasp.

My, my, look what we have here,
a lovely double lady,
double-headed, double-crossing; double trouble.

You pick at the stitches of your sewn-up friends,
poking and prodding at the stuffing threatening to overflow,
smirking and having a nice time.
I, the Jester, the Joker, the Fool,
do what I do best, better than you,
all in good fun, it is, it is!

You laugh one moment,
neck cracking the next,
before tearing off my nicely-sewn head!
Yes, for what you may do,
I obviously may not,
that's clearly how this circus is run!

A dip and a sigh barely escapes painted lips,
before ridicule is set upon for such a thing,
oh how dare I have ever-so-slight feelings!
You scream out with joy and porcelain affections,
but oh, not a word from the supporting cast,
lest our mouths be ripped off!

A twitch pulls my strings and around your throat they go,
making sure to get both heads tightly wound,
making sure of your faults, you know,
making sure that after, I'm not around.
Were you in my place, you'd do the same,
so not a peep out of you, darling,
we the people, of judgement fair,
sentence you to a silent killing.

Rough breaths escapes me,
dashing through the shadow'd night;
My mind is triggered by a known scent,
as are the others who soon redirect,
towards what we all know is a common goal;
Survival.

Claws dig into the dirt,
springing me forward faster and faster,
eyes glinting brightly in the darkness.
Someone caught sight, a howl sounds,
speeds increase with strengthened bounds,
towards what we all know is;
Survival.

Determination radiates from all,
coming together slowly and surely,
power pulsing and connecting us.
Right in front of me is the target,
I lunge in and latch on,
confirming that we all get the common necessity;
Survival.

Snip the threads, string by string,
they won't remember you, silly little thing,
cut the pictures, erase the letters,
burn the pieces, it's all for the better,
destroy the evidence, destroy the past,
eliminate everything, save none from the blast,
simply forget it all, bit by bit,
they're done with you, have had enough of it,
delete the memories, good and bad,
delete all that you've ever had,
vanish from life just for a while,
they'll still go on, they'll still smile,
just snip the threads, string by string.
They can't remember you;
Silly little thing.

With needle and thread, I arrive,
and glance upon the horrific scene.
I get out my kit so you may thrive,
but what does it all even mean?

With needle and thread, I stitch you up,
and gaze into your haunted eyes.
I take out a syringe, fill a ****** cup,
but when will you ever rise?

With needle and thread, I outline my heart,
and point to it for future needs.
I smile sadly as I've done my part,
but why would you do more similar deeds?

With needle and thread, I shut my eyes,
so I may no longer see precisely.

Oh but don't you worry your little heart dear,
for I will still sew you up nicely.

No longer am I walking on eggshells,
oh no, my feet now gracefully dance,
leaping on whispered winds,
landing on a delicate, creamy surface,
I used to be so afraid of breaking.
Now I've long since grown not to care,
if they crack, if they shatter,
simply place them with me and my sanity,
six feet under, decomposing,
for nobody has use for a long cracked egg;
Especially when its insides leak out,
like an alien goo, unlike what it's meant to be,
full of life, purpose, ideas, joy;
Now it's just a sad, rotting mess,
not even the best craftsmen could piece together,
though even if they could, it wouldn't last long,
for nobody can truly erase or fix,
those cracks in the surface.

Dancer, dancer, on a string,
watch her move and hear her sing,
frown-masked smirks all around,
making her cry, making her frown,
but she gives them everything,
more than they deserve,
for she cares far too much,
to just let them burn.

Dancer, dancer, spinning fast,
there's no knowing how long she'll last,
performing for others who do not care,
she might even fall down the stairs,
of pressure and of people broken,
weighing down with lack of thankful token.

Someone runs in to cut the strings,
but they're made of wire, dastardly things,
so grabbing on and holding strong,
they help her move herself along,
to free feelings, free thoughts;
A free life with wide leaps in open fields.

Alone in a room of shadows with a bright screen,
my invisible tail twitches in devious interest,
the blackened veil covers my eyes;
There shall be no more light to see tonight.

Claws elongate, tapping rhythmically on a wooden base,
a devil's grin spreading far and wide on my face,
the evil mist of my mind spreading throughout my frail body;
It's not a headache when controlled.

A serpent's tongue licks a fang,
sensing every little creature of prey around,
a hissing chuckle evaporating into the air;
A different nature has demanded dominance.

Strong hands wrap around a tensing throat,
squeezing and releasing with every pitiful patter of a heartbeat,
teasing the poor victim with promises of death and salvation both;
Who dared awaken this beast?

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but
Oh how words hurt me so,
Dueling cards; Of hearts and spades,
And the diamonds lay neutral between.
These scars invisible to **** eye,
Are poisoned and burn me endlessly.
This war has gone on too long,
And now all three sides are losing,
Mind,
Heart,
Sanity.
An everlasting cycle of pain and recovery.
The Heart rebels and the ***** controls,
Whilst the Diamond attempts mediation.
The Joker is in play, passively,
And the Old Maid watches from a distance.
Only a fire can burn the paper,
But instead, water’s life is needed.
The Heart works away, the *****, the day,
But only to crash at midnight.
The only true way to solve it all is,
To give up, to let go,
But nobody does that.
I know.

Crimson flows through their veins,
their eyesight blinded by the same haematic hue;
Heavy breathing, heavy steps, heavy heart,
dragged down by the burden of hatred.
They shall forever stain their own hands,
destroying, ruining, killing, slaying;
Everything, everyone,
every last hope for humanity within them.
For every victim is a damning curse,
every victim is a power surge,
to their own necessary need to get back;
At them, at the world, at everyone who said they couldn't.
Now look at what they've become, a slave,
chained by the flames of rage ignited,
with a desire for carnage unquenchable until;
They reach the Hell they have caused.

A corpse stumbling through the rain asks,
"What is the purpose of this meaningless life?"
though unfortunately words are not heard,
the scream of his mind echoing in his thoughts.

Blackened blood smearing on frigid cold skin,
pondering what it was like to be human,
to be living productively in the present,
rather than a blurry state of nothing but living;
If you could call it that at all.

Shuffling across cracked pavement,
hopelessly looking for a feeling,
something not yet known, or remembered;
An internal struggle only seen as a groan,
unable to give much more detail,
a foggy expression within his faded eyes.

Weeds overflow into weathered buildings,
much like numbness has crawled across nerves,
signifying that nothing will get better,
nothing will get worse,
nothing is the best option;
Nothing is good.

Driven by nothing more than a need to go on,
to survive, thrive with what is to be had,
feeding off of the emotions of others,
trying to comprehend it all,
though as soon as a glimpse of it comes close enough to touch;
It vanishes,
like a flickering end scene of a movie once enjoyed.

Feeling nothing is such an odd sensation,
you don't smack into walls,
you glide through them,
heartbreak and loss just pass overhead,
you can't care about a thing in the world,
yourself less than anything,
your heart a withering black rose,
unable to be nursed back to health,
but it's all your fault, you chose it.

The days drift by and all you can do,
is watch hopelessly from your grave,
which, you dug yourself, of course,
such a slow process, nobody notices,
until it's too late, then oh the shame,
how could we not have seen this sooner?

Till you're just a rotten corpse,
laying, fading away,
unable to drag yourself out of it all,
unable to put yourself out of misery,
just sitting and waiting for someone to do something,
but alas no one comes, no one saves you from yourself,
they may have helped at one point,
but like a book you're put back on the shelf,
'cause nobody has time to read you,
your pages have become too thick,
for all these light and simple minds,
it just simply makes you sick,
till the rage builds up inside you,
then all you can do is;
Snap.

As the spiders weave their threads of doubt,
a shining blade comes to my rescue,
though also to my demise.

Whispers are conjured by the darkness;
They don’t love you, a slash confirms,
they don’t care, a slash accepts,
****** marks covering skin like a torn blanket.

Voices are echoing the past;
You deserve to die, a slash reminds,
you deserve to suffer, a slash insists,
spikes of pain traveling up veins.

Screams are pressuring the mind;
You’re a worthless thing, a slash states,
you’re so pathetic, a slash declares,
words etching in permanently.

Hollowness fills the heart;
You need to feel this pain,
you need to drown in it all;
Until you finally give up on yourself.

My heart is moldy,
filled with rotten memories I long should have removed.
Now they remain as a horrid disease,
cutting off circulation when least expected.
Most would throw out such a dysfunctional *****,
but I let it stay in hopes of a slow recovery.
With windows open, I inhale,
it cleanses my lungs, finally and fresh,
working through my bloodstream,
reviving the heart as the contamination vanishes,
though it's unknown whether it's better,
to be sterile instead of stale.

There once lived a fair maiden,
skin white as snow,
for ivory was too filthy for her.
Her hair was dark as night,
for other colors were not pure enough,
especially not enough for her.
Suitors came from far and wide,
but oh, they came for naught,
as none of them could suit her needs,
could not ever be enough.
So one day she begged and pled,
to anyone who would hear her call,
for finally someone who would be hers,
and likewise once and for all.
Before she knew it,
someone did respond,
red tail wrapped around her soul,
dragged her down to hell forever,
to be his and his alone,
he smirked and accepted her offer,
bond sealed by vocal contract made,
then welcomed her to his humble abode,
surrounded by rock, and firey flame.
It was now she wept,
trying to take back what was said,
but it was far too late for her,
as they were already wed.
The poor maiden was slave to her pride,
now slave to a demon much worse,
her pitiful woes that were not to complain of,
though now of course, too late, she knows.

The bright light shines on my mind,
I have to go, I must go; I know.
Though paranoia racks through my thoughts,
what if they catch you, they're going to catch you;
I care not for none can hope to tame this beast,
the one who controls me every evening,
making me slave to its chaotic frenzy.
The shadows of demons sway and laugh,
apart of me growls back and defends,
while the other just gives in.
This shall happen time after time,
again and again,
until I'm consumed by the night.

The day you left felt cold,
as if my coat and gloves left me,
in the midst of a blizzard;
I froze to death.
Though was it really me that died,
or a part of me that loved you,
none can say for sure,
I lost my memory;
Destined to wander alone in the tundra.

The day you left was dark,
as if my sun had not faded from the sky,
but disappeared entirely;
I went blind.
Though was I blinded by lack of light,
or did I just not want to see,
I went into denial;
Allowing the darkness to consume my eyes.

The day you left seemed hollow,
as if the vivid colors of my life had vanished,
erased like pencil from paper;
I faded along with them.
Though most would argue that I still live,
I am nothing but an empty shell of myself,
I became a ghost;
Hoping that in doing so, I would see you again.

Smile brightly for them, girl,
they want to see you cry,
but you've got to be positive,
you've got to be happy,
happier than I ever could be;
Do it for them.

Lift your chin up, girl,
rough times lay ahead,
but you've got to be brave,
you've got to be strong,
stronger than I ever could be;
Do it for me.

Rise out of the ashes, girl,
everyone's going to burn you down,
but you've got to bounce back,
you've got to fly high,
higher than I ever could get;
Do it for yourself.

Dashing madly across open fields,
following an arch of multicolored joy,
filled with hope, happiness, love;
Everything I cannot have.

Enduring cold, pouring rain,
icy, whispering winds,
stabbing rocks against poor soles;
Carrying on, following dreams.

Serenading ideas, tricks of mind,
gracefully leaping through death,
gently landing on weathered stone;
Arriving at the end of the line.

Mirages fade fast, no life, no scene,
nothing save a fleeting glimpse,
what could have been,
what was in mind;
Now just millions of miles in the ever-growing distance.

Don't want to think,
don't want to move.
Don't want to feel,
every scratch and groove,
in my worn down defenses,
I built up so high,
hoping that someday;
I would touch the sky.

I wonder sometimes,
If people actually care for what I say,
Or if I'm just writing, toiling away,
For nothing.
The thoughts always swirl,
my head is a constant mess.
Does anyone care?
I write for the joys,
but also for the cold pain;
To become hollow.

As I type, as I write sometimes,
I ponder my existence.
I try to view the world in a different way.
I can't see friends as friends,
but people;
Acquaintances.

It seems I subconsciously try to block myself out,
From this cold, cold world.
Though I was indeed made for it,
like an Eskimo.

Roots digging into floorboards;
How did this even start?
Perhaps it was back when,
I had a deep pain in my heart.
Sprawling out onto a comforting ground,
sleeping much, growing round;
I never intended on losing control,
I just felt my life was not whole.
Now life-locked into place,
sleeping off problems I can't bear to face;
Once I was human, now a potato I remain,
the couch is but a shelf to hold me,
yet I still feel pain.

Souls float past whispered conversations,
city lights flare bright as others pass by,
steady swirling movements surround me,
reaching out, falling back through endless void,
deleting decades of built confidence;
So here I stand, alone.

Pairs of people dance through my eyes,
flocks of friends drift away,
flower of family wilts to dust,
leaving me to grasp for something, anything,
to fill the silence in my heart;
Here I am, alone.

Frightened tears dropping at night,
quickened breath with closing throat,
frozen skin with shaking limbs,
piercing my heart and mind till nothing exists,
begging for a savior in the night;
Please don’t leave me alone.

My hands are cold,
Numb, and they lack a pulse too,
It would seem;
As do my feet while I walk without feeling,
Anything I could ever hope to.
Ice flows delicately through my veins,
And I find it beautiful,
Nobody else does;
Being dead is apparently,
Not good for your health.
My skin is colorless,
Like a corpse,
Or a cloud,
Whichever works for the person who sees me and,
How the sleepless nights have added up,
My eyes are glassy,
Certainly not holding the spark that once flamed,
Within my heart and everything I saw.
The colors have faded.
My lips,
Cracked, bleeding, and dry,
Whisper a last word nobody hears.

Oh goddess of my thoughts and recollections,
lend me your calm mind,
your everlasting beauty in the way you remember,
the treasures within the past that you find;

Moments close to heart,
too much so to just slip away,
swirls of ink blot the page,
making sure it's all to stay.

A moonlit glow encircles my eyes,
as they no longer see the current time,
only the past mistakes and lies,
the experiences I thought were mine.

Oh goddess, Mnemosyne, lend me your name,
give me the strength to hang on,
aiding me in this battle of brain,
before it all disappears like dreams into dawn.

Have you ever slept with anyone,
nothing funny,
just rest and comfort?

You will notice it is much,
much different,
and you’ll miss it,

When the heat turns down,
you’re alone in the cold,
you’ll miss it,

When the thunder rumbles,
and lightning flashes,
you’ll miss it,

When the tears keep falling,
and you lose yourself,
you’ll miss it most of all.

Take a look into my eyes and you will see,
what dead men see,
what children dream,
what I myself and I alone have endured.
Take a listen to my voice and you will hear,
battle cries from fallen soldiers,
hollow words from broken thoughts,
a haunting melody only I can sing.
Take a glance into my heart and you will feel,
shattering heartbreak,
unimaginable grief,
along with the greatest of heart-warming care.
Peer into my self and you shall experience,
what it’s like to love too much,
to know true uncontrollable fear,
sadly only I know and can hope to know,
these horrors, joys, burdens of myself,
though I suppose it would be nice to have,
someone blind enough to see.

My heart thrums louder than ever before,
with newly found passion, new life, it would appear.
Something, perhaps someone, has jump-started it,
sent it on overdrive on emotions so high up in the clouds it’s hard to breathe,
think,
comprehend.
I cry out into the night,
for how can I be so skyward, yet you so hellbound?
I throw down a ladder of my thoughts,
praying you climb up to join me,
in holy matrimony among angels and demons,
we can battle them all, you know,
even I know we can tackle the world,
with the power of mutual love.

A daughter wrote a poem about her family,
how much she loved everyone,
how much she cared;
Showed it to her father who looked and said,
"That's awesome! Great job!"
She smiled because her message got across.

A girl wrote a poem about her friends,
how much she appreciated them,
how much she cared;
Showed it to her best one who smiled and said,
"That's amazing! Thank you so much!"
She grinned back because they knew what it was for.

A person wrote a poem about her life,
how it was starting to get difficult,
how she needed some support;
Showed it to her mother who glanced and said,
"Oh, that's nice, I suppose."
She stared back and walked away, sighing.

A corpse wrote a poem about itself,
how it didn't want to live anymore,
how it might do something it'll regret;
Showed it to her last resort who didn't look, just crumpled it up and said,
"Nobody cares."
With a shot, she dropped to the floor.

I feel my eyes drooping,
The pattern is still looping.
One day, to a night,
I just sleep and feel alright.
But now I cannot escape,
To that world where there is no hate.
For I know a greater horror lurks there,
But yet it really is everywhere.
A flash, a slight closing of my eyes,
And I awake back to that place of lies.
If I shall awaken from this horrid nightmare,
If I do survive, I might be changed. Beware.

"Write anything!" they say,
so I glance upon the blank slate of my mind.
I could write anything,
say anything,
feel anything I wanted;
but alas, all I'm left with is 'anything'.
Where is the structure,
where is the form,
where are the boundaries to work off of?
There is nothing, only 'anything',
which could be something but nothing at all.
My muse scrambles around trying to find,
an image,
a thought,
'anything' to work off of,
but alas, all I'm left with is 'anything'.

Dearest child, come here, come near,
whisper your secrets into my waiting ear,
I'll stay right here until you're through,
even then, I'll remain with you;

Into the night where monsters play,
it's alright, we were born this way,
destined to be misunderstood,
destined to wander deep in the wood;

Running and striding past trees of green,
where problems are forgotten and we're not seen,
though that's okay, we rarely are,
disappearing is how we've come so far;

So come with me, to fantasy,
to a place where all is meant to be,
where birds sing and flowers smell sweet,
to journey together is such a lovely treat.

May you take my breath away,
gasp by gasp in fear, in laughter, in anger,
until there is no life left in my hollow lungs.
When you stand before me, looming like the devil I know,
I can only stare in horror as my soul is claimed by the unknown.
My eyes can only widen in the pure terror;
As it's happened again, though this time,
I should have known better.
It's not the first, oh no,
definitely not the first time,
I've been betrayed, I've been hurt, I've been stabbed,
though it hurts freshly nonetheless, bleeding softly into the night.
I should have known you were no different,
I should have known you were not like minded,
I should have known you would come to hurt me;
Though in my happiness, I was ignorant,
the shame, the shame, oh what a shame I am now,
within my mind and memories of lessons I had learned,
yet horribly forgotten.

A blank screen shows ‘No Messages’,
I sigh and throw it to the side,
before rushing back to check;
time after time,
again.
Some might say it’s sad,
others, hopeless;
But it’s so much more than that.
When you feel as if you have nothing,
feel nothing,
am nothing;
Can you blame yourself for craving what soothes you?
Check, check, check,
send messages to check,
stare for hours to check,
becoming worried, stupidly so;
But it’s all worth it in the end,
when you’re brought to life.

"There's nothing wrong with you!" said a smile to a frown,
who was desperately try to turn things around,
but the frown was only itself, it could not change,
its mouth piece could not be re-arranged.

"Everything is in your head!" assured a friend to a dead end,
who could not even hope to comprehend,
the problems bundled up at the u-turn,
unable to get better, or how to learn.

"You are the one who wants to ruin my mood!" mumbled a negative to a negative,
but there cannot be a double, so one needs a sedative,
before the collision sparks and collides,
leaving one to suffer, trying to survive.

"You are far too beautiful to be doing this to yourself." whispered a demon to a lost soul,
who didn't realize they cause most of the pain and lack of happiness whole,
who didn't recognize the compliments would sound like lies,
as that is the true nature of them anyway.

Some people were born deaf,
other's words going right over their head,
not even entering at all.
Ignorant to other views,
oblivious to other thoughts,
blind to any logic except their own.
They cannot learn, cannot change,
hearing aids will do no justice;
They'll refuse to use them anyway.
If unfortunate, they cannot see,
hurt feelings, painful words,
all things negative caused by them,
not admitting faults, throwing blame elsewhere.
Surrounded by a painful energy,
people can barely stand to tolerate.
How do you heal such a person far gone?
You don't; For all you do will hit an unbreakable wall,
of their unbreakable minds,
so you can only hope they shatter themselves,
only hope they hear the voices of reasons,
see the light of knowledge;
For only then, they can function properly.
If they choose to, that is.

There are billions of colors in this world,
Some we cannot even put a name to.
It is with those colors that we paint our canvas of life.
Everyone creates a different painting,
Even if the colors are the same.
Do you have the bright blue of the summer sky?
Or perhaps a professional gray?
There are colors for what we do, what we think.
Though the colors we cannot explain,
Are the ones that can be anything we feel.
What color is love, pain, anger?
That is where the art gets unique,
As nobody can agree on the meaning.

Is this my fate to share this curse alone,
befriended only by the shadows I create,
along with life-given sorrows unwanted?

Is this my fate to watch others change like tides,
moving in and out of my life's beach,
never permanently staying?

Is this my fate to lose my head,
all else that made me alive and well,
replaced by hollow longing?

I would not wish this curse on anyone,
especially someone I care for,
but someone would have to care for me,
when I finally go under from it all;
The everything that is nothing.

I've taken up a part-time job as a chew toy,
and a full-time job as a broken bird.
My wings, once white and magnificent,
now have shriveled and vanished,
for I am Icarus and have flown too close to my sun.
Men without faces to beds without feelings,
is this truly what I wanted?
Or am I the ultimate *******,
stuck in a constant scene with no safe word,
taking hit after hit because I feel I deserve it.
I find myself at the feet of Eros, beautiful in his godhood,
and I pray, I pray, please tell me I'm worth more than this,
tell me I can love, though I know not what love is,
nor if I deserve it,
tell me I can make something out of this chaos I have flown into.
And as he smiles, I feel my vision blurring as I hit the mattress,
that ****** mattress on the floor, plush with a false sense of security, but firm in its reminder of what I am;
he cups my face and stabs me,
"This is nothing,"
and so nothing I am.

A creak in the door, your heart skips a beat,
You try to catch your breath, and you hear the sound of walking feet.
Your heart pounds and you race off to get outside,
But the door seems cemented shut, oh no! Got to hide!
But you know you cannot escape one who is unstopped by walls, floors, and objects,
And all of its evil subjects.
Your close your eyes and hope it goes away, to end all this impending doom,
And yet then you sense something coming into your room.
You cannot move, it feared you still,
You cannot struggle, it holds your will.
Your eyes creak open, but not by your choice,
Then when you think you're done for, the sun comes up and saves you; rejoice!

You cannot 'choose' a cat,
it must be the other way around.
Why else would they scratch and hiss;
They simply don't want to be there,
even if you'd really like them to.
My dearest friend was almost evicted,
for she didn't get along with my family,
didn't care for her mother or siblings,
but we let her stay,
for she chose me.
She'll curl into my lap, so trusting,
purr with content when I'm around;
No, it's not my fault she's unkind to most people,
there aren't a lot of people I like either,
cats simply choose who they like and stick with them,
nobody can change that,
or even hope to know that,
until they are chosen themselves.
If they are never, well,
then they weren't meant to own a cat anyway!

So you decided to rip my emotions out,
so you decided to stab my back,
so you decided to poke holes in my lungs,
so you decided to shoot me down,
so you decided to put me in my place,
so you decided to be my ruler,
so you decided to be my mind;

So, you decided to go insane?

Here I lay, between enemy lines,
Throwing sedatives to both sides,
I cross my heart and hope to die,
Rather than have it divide.
Holes fill my system from un-aimed words,
Ripping me to shreds, it really hurts,
Others try to step in, but I push them,
Out of the line of fire, to safety,
Perhaps, where I should be,and
After all, these aren’t their wars,
Or anyone’s really,
They’re mine.
And I shall fight to keep peace,
Within myself,
Within everyone,
Until there is nothing left of me but recovering words.

I can still feel the whispers of past bruises on my skin,
still hear your horrid screaming in my ear ringing,
still flinch whenever people come too near,
whether they be friends or family;
All because of one's silly games.

I still get paranoid as I speak my thoughts,
still get anxious when confessing feelings,
still refuse to put both feet in trust,
to anyone, even myself;
All because of one's silly lies.

I still bend to the painful expressions of others,
still throw myself to the sharks for the better,
still use myself as a shield for the undeserving,
for they're more deserving than I;
All because of one's silly traps.

Mistakes made thrice,
a curse from life,
giving me Lemon after sour lemon.
Perhaps a Clementine should come around,
tiny blessing as they are,
and give me a taste of sweetness for once.

Darling child, lay softly down on your bed,
drift away from harsh times,
escape from what's in your head,
fall asleep to nursery rhymes;
Let your happiness be bred.

Dearest girl with a rose in your hair,
smile at those who give you grief,
smile at those who cause despair,
smile at those who give no relief;
For they are not even there.

Sweet friend, radiating beauty and grace,
let nothing worry you tonight,
as I gaze upon the beauty of your face,
so full of happiness, so full of delight;
I know you will win life's long race.

In the breeze of fall, the leaves blow away,
And sometimes follows with my humanity.
A gentle coming, a sweet melody,
A time where there's space for everything.
The seasons, the worlds mood; starts to change,
And we do too, it's very strange.
Throw a dusty window, lies the fate,
It's fading away at a deathly rate.
So keep your memories and save them well,
For they might bear a story to tell.