The breeze breaks me down,
I trudge along this tiresome road and its only been seven days.
I should be getting closer.
The truth is, I don’t know exactly where I’m headed,
but I tell myself it can’t be worse than where I've been.
The strength, it comes from god knows where,
sometimes I want to fall apart.
To wither away and fade out into the night sky.
Just like a star that is safely covered behind the pollution of humankind.
Confused.
I’m bruised with sadness, battered by lifes mistakes.
I no longer want to be the victim but it feels like the safest place.
Alone in my isolated state I don’t know if I’ll be OK.
Sometimes I want to scream at god and see if a miracle can just take my place.

I’m lazy.
I’m tired.
I always give up.

I want badly for this to change.
I cannot seem to keep my sanity as it always manages to slip away.
In a cage of dark resentment, is where I’m most content.
Finding freedom from myself in sleep when everything turns to black.
I am the cause of my sorrow, the battle is with myself .
I am the person I’m most upset with for my responses to cards I've been dealt.
Now I’m stuck in an infinite circle where I can’t seem to get up and run.
Creating all the madness, I play with loaded guns.
I’m trying to find my balance, on lifes uneven log.
I begin to cross it and sometimes wonder…maybe I've got it all wrong?
Why don’t I just let go, why am I so clasped on?
My tense arm twitches with hesitance as I begin to sketch my dreams.
Finding truth in tragedy, inspired by the maladies that never seem to leave.
I’ve torn out all the chapters, not pleased with all the turns.
I sit with bloodied hands surround by a blur.
Encased by obligations I set upon myself.
What’s the point in trying if it never seems to work.