I left this carnival,
or so it seemed to be.
My views have
Changed. Good or Bad?
I won't be the one,
To say in the coming years.

Girls with hula hoops,
Boys watching in awe,
How fantastic the
Colors seemed to swirl.
Like the fallen leaves
On a windy day.

But not the trees
are mainly bare, as
the circus crowd
Gathers around to
Catch the acrobat if
they should Fall.

Outside on the dirt path,
is me. sitting in thought,
Talking to more then myself.
The trees, grass, and
The earth listened to
my many tricky questions.

Why can't life be
Like tonight.
With all the vendors,
music, and travelers.
I tried to hide from
the rising sun, instead
my body made me absorb,
every bit of light.

The sun was the reminder,
To return home and
be in this other life.
More free then the
bird floating above me,
I thought of people
and the whole world.

No money left in my
money clip.  I found some
water.  I saw the ring leader
of the carnival and,
She eagerly smiled
"Life is what you make it."

No help this was, as
more and more contradictions
Sprang from my mouth.
Again she just smiled, so
Pretty was her smile.

Early that morning,
I tried to talk
to other beings, spirits,
but no truth was found.
Then like a lightning
bolt hitting a tree,
and causing fire everywhere,
The answer hit me. On
the ride home, I had
The same pretty smile,
as her.

The bluest sky can't bring back the leaves,
That are red and brown.
They sit collected at the side of the street,
as cars go and speed by.
With never ending destinations and plans,
How can we stop and look,
at things the World gives. So natural and free,
No inventions are required.
The green grass can only grow so thick,
Before blades cut it down.
Why not let it grow and let it be?
In the suburbs and farms,
The wind's heard, rustling the remaining leaves,
along with the smell,
of home during the spring. When the cows,
have the lingering odor.
By this time, the leaves return green,
It'll be long before,
The leaves crumble and turn brown,
and red.  Maybe by this
Time, people will notice them,
collected along the street.

I went out around quarter till ten.  The fun was starting up. The concerts were starting and the music I felt.  Moving my hips to the upcoming popular song, I saw this girl I'll never forget.  She had roses and lilies in her hair.  How pretty she was, I was afraid to talk.  I tried to mention a few words as she walked by.  How wonderful she moved, and so gracefully like the setting sun.  A few hours pass I'm walking home.  I glance to the right and there she appeared! I crossed the rural road and actually to my surprise spoke.  How great the conversation was.  I felt the connection how the trees feel the wind that blows. Inviting me back to her house. A party was starting. Everything was fine until we arrived at her house. Following her around I did since I didn't know any other person there. To the bathroom I went, came out, and music was now playing.  I saw her, disgustingly with another dancer.  I sat on the couch, thought, and made up my mind to leave.  As I did, another girl approached me, as pretty as the first.  We left together, back to another concert. Late it was, but we were dancing in the moonlight.  Coffee she wanted so I went to find some.  I got two cups and walked back to find her.  Then I saw her, her lips were locked. I dropped both cups.  I went home.  Early in the morning or late at night, I'm not sure which one it was.  I sung Happy Birthday to myself and couldn't sleep.  Both of these girls were on my mind.  How cruelly they acted to me.  Using me, I couldn't understand what I did.  I'll send them a message I thought.  So, I went and grabbed the message from the drawer and back to the concert I walked.  Both of the girls were at the concert with the guys they were lip locked and dancing with.  Not even leaving a note, on the stage I went.  The girls saw me and started to wave.  As they did I pulled out my .45 and to my brain it went.

she wears this mask
so divine behind it
How I want to tell her
I lover her so
But I know, it
will get me nowhere

Somehow I think  
she knows my fatal
secret.  She hides the
fact I love her so.  I can't
understand why I love her.
All I know she's not mine

The white line races past
My eyes steady and try to cast
Everything blurs and ties
Even the horizon can fool the wise

we were the ones pushed and shun
Architects pieces crumbled and done
This can only be nature’s pun

dream of screams and cry for lies
Who’s destined to fall and die
Who’s pulled and dragged for the climb

Only darkness from the sun
All our hearts weigh a ton
Changing the world
after the initial twirl

All our sources are drained
If everybody is blamed
How can we redeem and claim?

When our traces are sought
and when everything is lost
We stayed and what was the cost?

Through mistrust, and our father’s guns
all that is left is the fabricated sun

The fog lifted from the cold pond water.
Bodies jump and dive, naked in the moonlight.
Thinking of nothing else. Not even the degree
of this cold pond water.  The trees around are
all undefinable to the eye this night. In the universe
they were, as the stars are shining bright.
Laying in solemn wonder, a soul with
nothing but love on his mind. The one he
loves, their heart's away someplace in another
lover's eye.  Jealousy grows while trying to
find how to get her love in his dying eyes.  
More and more bitter his feelings arise. Looking
at the stars for answers to his most
unanswerable question.  Slowly, he grows weary,
and his thoughts are dreary. Entering into another realm
his senses stir.  The lover of his life is sitting
on a blanket, in the grass. Her thoughts racing,
she tries to hide them. She goes to walk and it's
him she sees.  The suns out by this time and the
fog dissipates but dew remains.  Back to the
blanket they go. No word was spoken between
them as, he reaches for her hand.  Embracing
it happily, they lay on the blanket in the grass.  
Keeping each other warm on this cool damp
morning.  Happy times they were, and more
then holding hands occurred.  The only thought
on his mind, how lovely she was. He never
wants to let her go. Both are laying, discretely
sleeping.  When the unexplainable noises of
nature sound.  His eyes grow wide and looking
over to the right were she was, Now Gone.

While I’ m walking along
I wonder where we belong

Why is it I, who sees the light?
Why is it you, who loves a fight?

While I’m walking along
It’s you that I forever long

Why do you seek the one
That is forever gone?

While I’m walking along
you alway say I’m wrong

I lie in and bed and often wonder
Why is it me the one left to ponder?

While I’m walking along
I just want to sing you a song

I sit and gaze upon our actions
while nobody scolds the factions

While I’m walking along
It’s you and I that should prolong

Why is it so hard to dare a dream
Who wants to work and redeem?

While I’m walking along
It appears I am not as strong

when you’re sure to know it all
You will surely be the one to fall

When you’re acting big and tall
No one will give a friendly call