Regret? Why should i?
There's nothing to regret. Everything happens for a reason.

In physics every particle in motion follows a single principle.
That principle states that a trajectory of a motion only happens in the minimum action possible.
That explains why apple falls in a straight lines, while lightning bolt moves in a zig-zag. Some might said it was meant to be. I said, it's the least action principle.

We are particles in motions. Our conscience appears because of that principle.
Brain communicates using an electric charge carried by a particle called electron. And guess what? Electrons are particles.

We are just bunch of moving particles. Following a principle called the least action principle.
We are particles in motions. We always move with the minimum action possible.
Whether we liked it
or not.

So, indeed it is. Everything is indeed happen for a reason. To spend the minimum action.
That's why we're in love. Because at that moment that's the least action possible.
That's why we're left alone. Because that's the least action possible.
That's why we fall. Because that's the least action possible.
That's why we're trying to get back up. Because that's the least action possible.
That's why we gave up. Because that's the least action possible.
That's why,
we are the way we are.

So why should we regret? We spend the least action possible.
Unless, the least action possible is by regretting.
Unless, the least action possible is to stop moving.

I dreamt about you last night
Well, not about you technically.
It's about my life
Without you in it.
My life
With zero sign of your existence

It felt real,
Every inch square of your skin
                                I didn't touch
Each expression in your face
                                 I didn't see
Every moment in time that
       I didn't spend with you
Each memory
We never made

I had a dream last night
A glimpse of life without you in it
                         And
As i woke up
I realized,
It was just called yesterday
And today, i have to experience it
Again
And again
                        Everyday

Oh no no no,
Don't get me wrong
I don't love you,
and never will.

If that's what it takes to be with you
Then, I will never love you
in every way that you would probably love.
in every way possible.

Oh no no no,
I can look you dead in the eye and say that
I don't love you
and never will.

If that's what it takes to look you in the eye
Then, I will never love you
in days and nights
in loneliness or in presence

Oh no no no,
There are no single statement that's true
That I don't love you,
and never will.

If that's what it takes to love you,
If loving you means stop loving you,
If loving you means not loving you they way it supposed to
Then, i don't love you
and never will

There's a strange man staring blankly at me.
With black circles around his eyes,
Pale skin, messy hair, and doesn't look well-groomed.
His skinny body covered in a bad fashion-sense.
He looks daunting.
Nay, he looks into nothing.

There's a strange man staring blankly at me.
An unfamiliar face i never saw before,
Dark brown iris surrounded by stained white around it.
He's just looking at me, i'm not even sure what he wants.
Does he need help?
Does he do that just because?

There's a strange man staring blankly at me.
Cold, like a rifle barrel in a gun point.
Sharp, like a 5.56 millimeter waiting to be fired.
And yet his eyes, doesn't spark anything.
His face is flat and emotionless.
No intention to kills but showing no mercy.

There's a strange man
Lives in my mirror.

Not a single vowel,
and yet you got the idea.

I don't know if i'd still be exist. Next time, maybe there'll be no next time. I don't know if it'll be a lost of opportunity or it is simply simplicity.

The truth is, i'm as clueless as dementia. It feels like i'm so close to forgetting who i am. I don't know you, yet i know you better than i know myself right now.

Insomnia was my late night snack i often enjoy. Now it feels empty. Like a broken bucket that can't be filled, it will always be empty. I don't know if you took something as you leave, i feel like i'm losing something. No, i don't think it's my sanity. Or maybe it is, because in my broken head live the idea of you never leave. Although in my broken heart, i know you were never here anyway. They conflict. They contradict. They sick.

Now, everything that happened are simply. I don't want to overthink things, yet i'm thinking about it overly. The fact that you said "maybe". I know it was just maybe.
For me, "maybe" means that there are possibility.
Or maybe, "maybe" means just maybe. I don't know if you're talking literally or hypothetically.
In my broken head, there's hope. In my broken heart, there's a shout to stop.
I don't know. I'm as clueless as dementia.

The truth is, i'm not just wishing you were here. I wish you wish i was there. Because maybe, if you wished that, i'll make it true. Truer than you. But maybe, just maybe, hypothetically, beside you is where i'll be. If your wish really is the same as me.
But i know, maybe is just maybe. Or maybe it's probably?
I don't know. I'm as clueless as dementia.