I thought I'd marry the first girl I ever loved
We'd have a beautiful wedding
And it was all choreographed from above

We could attract our opposites
Meet in the middle,
Compromise and then we'd settle.

But I slept through an existential nightmare
Where black clouds rolled
Like marching bands at midnight

And my guitar strings don't sing for you anymore
And we don't talk on the phone,
At least not like we did before.

So I'll stick this needle in my arm
And draw the poisoned blood from my heart
Before it reaches my brain and distorts my reality

Because my reality is lonely
And the truth is you don't want to be seen
With someone like me

As a young man he took the doctor's pills
Because he was alive but didn't want to be.

As a man he took someone else's  pills
Because he didn't feel alive but wanted to.

As an old man he took his own pills
Because he wanted to stay alive but couldn't help dying.

I woke up one morning with my insides in a knot
I froze to death from icy sweat, my body getting hot
And an angel stood beside me and he whispered in my ear
"For every day you misbehave I'll take another year"

So I stumbled to get out, empty bottles on the floor
And was aiming for my city as I crashed out through the door
I hurried out only to find I was a single soul
Everything was silent but a hellish belling knoll

The angel stood before me and cackled in my face
"In all your wildest fantasies, this here is the place!"
But here were no burning rivers or pillars made of fire,
The pain that came and scarred the most was from my own desires

What I wanted most in life was nowhere to be found
And the landscape that surrounded me was empty all around
I knew I'd never die again and would dwell here endlessly,
No one to keep me company and no drugs to keep my sanity

I woke up the next morning with my insides in a knot
I froze to death from icy sweat, my body getting hot.
And an angel stood beside me and she whispered in my ear
"The only way to stay away is to give up all your fear"