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grace Aug 2014
months have gone by
and you're still on my mind.
i've been doing a lot better
but i'm still not fine.

you're everywhere
and we can't even speak.
when i hear your voice
my stomach gets weak.

i can't avoid you forever,
but i'll definitely try.
why is it that i
can't look you in the eye?

i don't even know
if i want you back,
but i miss you a lot
that's a fact.

i miss your face
and i miss your smile.
it's sad i haven't seen it
in a while.

i can hardly breathe
when you're in the room.
i really want to
speak to you soon.

when you catch my eye
i turn the other direction.
are you trying
to get my attention?

i still feel hurt
out of the blue.
i can't help but wonder
if it hurts you too.
grace Jul 2014
even in a sea of people
your eyes still decide to meet mine
grace Jul 2014
can you believe at 3:24 am
i'm the only one awake
no one to talk to
my mind is alive
the thoughts rushing
please don't remember
the drunken decisions
the selfish actions
the hurtful notions
make me forget
because i cannot bear to face them when my mind is not altered
  Jul 2014 grace
Darby Rose
This city is ******* the life out of me,
in such a fast and glamorous manner.

I want to run away.
Wanderlust does not even begin to describe the extent of what I am feeling.
Cabin fever, no,
I have cabin flu.
I am coughing,
and sneezing,
and wheezing bits and pieces of my soul amidst mucus in my lungs.
I am losing myself,
stuck within the confines of every habit
and being
that has overtaken me and I have grown so accustomed to over the years.
It is time to cut ties.
Be alone, and free.
Isolation is the key to discovering the authentic me.
I love this city so ******* much. And I'll likely always come back, and I will never hesitate to call it home. But right now, I must get out.
grace Jul 2014
i watched you change right before my eyes
it was the most painful thing to see
so gradual i barely noticed the difference at the time
but now i see it clearly

perfect is what you were
we took a wrong turn
is that what landed you here?
how am i still sane?
why didn't i change?
can you not see all that is wrong?
i we wish could rewind to the crossroad,
but even with faith it seems impossible

you will never be him again
we will not replay
repeat
but God, i wish we could
even if it meant breaking my heart again
June 19th, 2014 10pm
grace Jul 2014
It's quite sad how that connection always lasts.
It could be days, weeks, months.
But it's as if we start right where we left off.
Like an unfinished autobiography.
As soon as a word comes out of the other's mouth,
we can't help but smile at one another.
As if there wasn't a tragedy that went on between us.
It's been a week.
And I know it will be there the next time we see each other.
But I fear the day that the connection between us ceases to exist.
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